Chapter 20 #2
“Knowing I hurt you this way …” My voice falters. “And knowing I took something from her …” I swallow hard because that’s the part that sits like a stone in my chest.
“She deserved those first two years with her dad. The midnight feedings. The first steps. The first time she said a word that sounded like anything close to Daddy.” My throat tightens around it. “And I’d made a decision that erased that.”
The guilt is constant. Quiet some days. Crushing on others.
“I told myself I was protecting her,” I whisper. “Protecting us.”
I look at him then, forcing myself not to look away.
“I can live with you being angry with me,” I say softly. “I don’t know how to live with the idea that I stole time from my own child.”
The silence between us is heavy.
“Well, you’re here now.”
“Yes,” I say quietly.
“And you’re looking at me like you just expect me to what, forgive you?”
“I don’t expect anything.” I spread my arms. “I just wanted to see you. I needed to see you. To explain.”
Our eyes lock, and all the anger, hurt … and attraction, still burns.
He stands and steps closer to me.
“Do you have any idea how hard it’s been to keep myself from seeing you?” his voice rumbles.
I suck in a breath. “Probably as hard as it’s been for me to not come down to the locker room to see you.”
We’re inches apart now.
“Liam … ” I pause. “Maybe this was a bad idea, me coming here tonight.”
“Probably.”
“You’re still mad at me.”
“Very.”
I still. “Right. Okay.”
But neither of us moves away. Instead, his hand slides to my jaw, fingers warm on my cheek.
“You drive me insane,” he says.
“But I showed up at your door to figure this out,” I counter softly.
“Yeah,” he admits, “you did.”
And then he kisses me.
This kiss isn’t soft. It’s frustrated and a bit desperate. And full of everything that still needs to be said.
My hands grip his shirt like I’m afraid he’ll disappear if I let go.
His arms wrap around my waist, and he pulls me in closer.
“You hurt me. Not once, but twice,” he says against my lips.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“Don’t disappear again, Alie. No matter what.”
“I won’t.” And I mean it.
No matter what happens between the two of us, I won’t because of Seraphina.
The next kiss is deeper. Hotter, messier. And neither of us stops it.
The distance to the bedroom disappears in a blur of hands and unfinished sentences, the tension between us finally snapping under the weight of everything we’ve been holding back.
When we get into the room, he turns me and presses the front of his body against my back, his hands at my waist. His grip is firm, and he tugs me back into him so I can feel his erection.
“I’m not fucking you tonight.”
I lean my head back against his shoulder, raising my arms and winding them around his neck.
“Okay,” I whisper. “Yeah, we probably shouldn’t.”
He brings his mouth to my neck, trailing kisses from my ear to my jaw.
I turn my head, and he traces my lips with the tip of his tongue.
I open with a moan, and our tongues tangle.
His hands slide up my slides and he cups my breasts over my thin dress.
Then he pinches my nipples, which makes me break the kiss with a gasp.
“I’m not fucking you, but I am going to make you come.” He rolls my nub between his fingers. “Happy birthday.”
“Liam … ” I moan when he pulls on my nipple and runs his tongue from my neck to my mouth.
His hands move from my chest to my stomach. “If you don’t want this, just say the word, and I’ll stop right now.”
I shake my head. “Don’t you dare stop.”
He kisses me again, deeper this time, and as he does, I glide my fingers up the back of his head, through his hair, holding him to me. His hands move to the bottom of my short dress, and his fingers skim along the inside of my thighs.
When he reaches my center, he moves the thin strap of my lacy thong to the side.
“Is this all for me?” He slides his middle finger up and down my center.
I haven’t been touched like this since our night together. The sensation is overwhelming, and I can’t find words, so I just nod.
“Fuck. You’re so wet.”
I should be embarrassed by the obvious sound of my arousal, but I’m not.
Instead, my body feels like it’s on fire. And I don’t want this feeling to end.
Liam’s hand falls. “Turn around.”
So, I do.
He takes hold of the hem of my dress and fists it in his hands. Almost like he’s going to rip it right off of me, but he doesn’t take it off.
My palms smooth over the muscles on his warm chest. Then I make my way to the edge of the waistband of his shorts, noticing he’s not wearing any boxers. Slowly, I reach inside and take hold of his erection.
All rational thought flees my mind as I stroke him.
He swallows and closes his eyes for a minute.
I pull my hand out long enough to take the sides of his shorts and pull them down his legs.
I kneel in front of him. His cock is thick and hard and right in front of my face.
I have to get my mouth on him. I slide my hands up his legs and wrap one around his thigh before moving it up to his ass and the other around his cock.
I lick the crown first, tasting him. He groans as I wrap my mouth around the head, then take him deep to the back of my throat. I gag, so I pull back, but keep his cock in my mouth.
“Alie, fuck.”
I look up through watery eyes and see him looking down at me. I see heat, desire, and something else I can’t name right now. He sweeps my hair into his hand, tugging, then starts rocking his hips with the rhythm of my mouth.
I’m so turned on by him, by this, that I can feel my slickness along the inside of my thighs.
Pausing, I look up at him and hold my hand out. “Spit.”
“Jesus, Alie. You’re gonna kill me.”
He spits into my palm, and then I wrap it around his shaft, coating him as I run my hand up and down. Then I lick up his length to the tip, then wrap my lips around the crown and suck.
“Come here.” He releases my hair, then reaches under my arms and pulls me up.
Then he sits on the edge of the bed, and he slowly pulls the ties on the straps of the dress, making it fall and pool at my feet. “You’re so beautiful. Just like I remember. And I fucking love that you’re not wearing a bra.”
“Doesn’t work with this dress,” I pant.
He kisses across my stomach, then up to my breasts, twirling his tongue around my nipple, making it pebble even more than it already was.
Then he releases me and scoots back to the middle of the bed.
He holds his hand out to me, so I climb on and straddle him.
His hands grasp my waist. “Come sit on my face. I need to taste you.”
“Okay,” I say, voice husky to my own ears.
I reposition myself so my knees are on either side of his head.
He grabs my waist and pulls me to his mouth. Then he leans in and swipes his tongue through my center, oh so slowly. “I love the way you taste. I’ve never forgotten.” He flicks my clit with the tip of his tongue and slides a finger into me.
“Wait, I want to make you feel good too.”
I move to his side and turn my body, repositioning myself over his head. Taking hold of his dick with one hand, I spit on his cock, then slide my hand up and down his shaft.
“I love the way you feel in my mouth,” I say, then wrap my lips around the head and suck, making his hips buck.
He pulls my hips back down to his mouth, and he circles my clit with his tongue as two fingers slip inside my pussy.
We find a rhythm together, and it’s not going to take long for me to erupt.
My body feels hot all over, my heartbeat pounding in my chest. The feel of his tongue and fingers inside me and tasting his salty pre-cum in my mouth …
it’s almost too much. A tingling sensation spreads through me, and my pussy starts to contract around his fingers.
I release his dick with a pop, but I don’t stop stroking him.
When I moan, he pumps his fingers in and out of me, and then he sucks hard on my clit, making me come. Then, before I can catch my breath, ropes of cum hit me on my chin and chest. It’s so fucking hot that another orgasm rushes through me.
His hands move to my thighs, and he holds me gently. “You, okay?”
I nod, trying to speak. “I’m more than okay.”
But I’m also a mess now, and I need to go clean up. So, I lift off of him and shift to the side.
“I just need to go clean up a little.” I turn to look at him and smile.
“Come here first.” He pats the bed next to him.
I lean toward him, and he runs a finger through his cum—from my chest to my chin, then into my mouth.
I take hold of his hand and suck on the finger in my mouth, looking him in the eye while I do it.
“Fuck,” he whispers. “You’re so fucking sexy.”
I twirl my tongue around his finger and slowly pull it out of my mouth.
“Be right back.” I get off the bed, then go clean up in the bathroom.
When I get back to the bed, I lie beside him, my heart still racing, now for a different reason. I’m not sure what to say or do now. So, I just rest my head next to his, curling into his side. I absent-mindedly start tracing patterns across his chest.
He’s quiet, but not distant. More like he’s lost in thought.
“What do we do now?” I whisper.
He exhales slowly. “Now,” he says, voice rough but steady. “I meet my daughter the right way.”
Tears fill my eyes. “Okay.”
He tips my chin, forcing me to look at him. “What we just did doesn’t erase the anger or hurt. It’s going to take me some time. But, we'll figure this out.”
It’s a promise, but I know we haven’t reached forgiveness yet. I see it in his eyes.
But it does feel like something real. And for the first time since he walked out of my office, I feel like everything might just be okay.