Chapter 11
MARTHA
Our room was lovely with a view out over the beach and it was so nice to dump our bags and take it in turns to have long, luxurious baths.
We’re a good team, Erin and me. We aren’t known to argue and we share a mutual respect. Erin doesn’t talk to me like I’m an old woman and I don’t treat her like a child.
We had until the following night when the ferry left at ten to take us back to the mainland and on to our next checkpoint and I was very much looking forward to exploring this beautiful archipelago.
Hotel staff told us of pretty nature walks with a small chance of seeing their large black bears.
Although they said that fall was the best time of year for a sighting.
River otters and bald eagles, Haida ermine and pine martens were also a possibility.
And if we went out in a boat there was a chance to see humpback whales, sea otters, orcas and dolphins.
It was a lot and I had to rally some enthusiasm when my bed and a cup of tea were calling.
Harrison and Sam would be the first to leave with a twenty-minute head start.
Femi and Liz would be close behind them and then the girls, the twins and us.
It was going to be another scramble for lifts to Skidegate and I could see conversations already happening between the contestants and the hotel staff, but they wouldn’t help us.
Cally had said they’d been told not to. And really, what did it matter?
There was only one ferry back to the mainland.
No one was going to miss it. This part of the journey we were all doing together.
I guessed that once we were travelling further east, the options would open up and there would be more chance of getting a decent lead. I certainly hoped so.
Erin and I left for a sedate walk onto a woodland trail with the promise we’d be back for the beach barbecue we would all be having later. Noah looked set to follow, but I smiled sweetly and asked for us to have some private time.
‘Can you take the small camera?’ he asked. ‘If you see any animals of interest, get some footage, would you?’
‘Of course,’ I said and he showed us how to operate it. Really, it was a point and press scenario, I was pleased to see.
Once we were fully onto the trail with the group far behind us, I reached for Erin’s hand.
‘I have an idea for the next leg of the journey,’ I told her.
‘We don’t know where that will be yet.’
‘I know but it doesn’t matter. I overheard someone on the ferry talking about a haul back.’
‘What’s one of those?’ Erin asked.
‘It’s where an RV place gets you to take one of their motorhomes back to another of their branches. Apparently it’s free and in some cases they cover the cost of the fuel too. If we can get to one, we could really go for that.’
‘That’s brilliant,’ Erin said. ‘And we’d save money on accommodation too as we could sleep in the vehicle.’
‘There’s no guarantee a vehicle will be available, of course, but we should definitely try.’
The trail took us for a gentle stroll to a lake where a picnic table encouraged us to rest and admire the view.
It was warmer today and the chilly breeze of the previous day had dropped.
We both had a top layer of fleece on though, as the temperature wasn’t as warm as we’d expect back at home in late May.
We’d been rushing for three days and now, to be able to sit and simply contemplate was lovely.
The water was still and had beautiful reflections of the green mountains and the fir trees.
More bald eagles soared overhead and I turned the camera on to capture the image as they circled the water before disappearing into the trees.
I knew it would only be a matter of time before I would have to say it.
‘Your mum would have loved this,’ I said wistfully as I looked out over the lake.
‘You know, I find it so hard to truly enjoy a moment like this because in the back of my mind I’m always thinking that Clare is missing out.
I tell myself to remember all that she achieved and all she got to do and see, but it will never be enough. ’
‘I know,’ Erin said quietly.
‘Is there anything you want to say about her?’ I asked. I felt as if I was always prompting Erin to talk about Clare. It was so important to keep her memory alive. It wasn’t lost on me that Erin wasn’t always forthcoming. Or really, ever.
‘Erm, it doesn’t really work like this for me,’ she said. ‘I know that in a beautiful setting or at an unusual time you always think about her but I don’t. She comes to my mind at other times. It doesn’t mean I didn’t love her.’
She added this so quickly onto the end I reached my hand out to touch her shoulder.
‘I know, love,’ I said. ‘Of course it doesn’t mean that.’
We sat quietly for a while and I could see Erin’s mind whirring behind her eyes. I felt bad then because I knew she was trying to come up with something to pacify me, so we could have this shared moment, somehow.
‘Whenever I think about the possibility of having children, my thoughts always centre on them not having a grandmother. That’s silly, isn’t it?’
Well, it wasn’t quite the heart-wrenching speech I thought Erin might be inspired to give in this beautiful place but I accepted she wasn’t me and she was allowed to remember her mother in any way she wanted.
‘They might well have a grandmother if their father’s mother is still alive when they are born,’ I said. ‘It’s not usually a one-sided situation.’
‘Yeah, well, I don’t even have a boyfriend to impregnate me, do I.’
‘You’re a beautiful young woman with so much love to give,’ I said. ‘There is someone out there just for you and they will be someone far more deserving than a prat called Hamish who likes to run around with an egg-shaped toy stuck under his arm.’
Erin smiled then and we sat in silence for a while, each with our own thoughts.
* * *
The barbecue was set up on the beach in front of the hotel. Everyone was there. They’d mostly managed to drop their competitive edge and were happily chatting when Erin and I arrived.
We had both made an effort with our appearance. Hair washed and blow-dried – which would be a last until the next checkpoint – best of our packed clothes, which were jeans and reasonable tops, and Erin had applied full make-up, which surprised me as she didn’t usually go in for that.
‘It’s for the camera,’ she said, but that didn’t work for me as we’d had a camera in our faces for the last few days already and she’d done little more than tie her hair back in a ponytail, wash her face and smear some moisturiser on it, which was a tad more than I had done to be fair.
The food was delicious. Big tuna steaks seared on the grill with bowls of salads and fresh bread.
There were jugs of ginger ale and bottles of water which was welcome because it didn’t cost us a penny.
I’d been keeping a close eye on our cash and had learned from snippets of conversation that others had been less frugal.
‘How’s your race going?’ asked Harrison who had somehow managed to sidle over without me noticing.
‘Brilliantly,’ I said brightly in response.
‘Look, Martha, it’s been a long time and I want to say how wonderful it is to see you. You really haven’t changed a bit. You still have that same beautiful smile.’
I nearly choked on my drink but managed to swallow it down.
‘I can’t imagine where you’ve seen that,’ I said, perhaps a little haughtily.
‘I see you smile at others,’ he said. ‘Look, I never really understood why you… ghosted me, I suppose the young folk would say. I didn’t think it could just be because I won the race.
You weren’t the sort of woman to take it so personally.
I rather hoped we’d cross the finish line together, you know. ’
‘How on earth was that going to happen after I missed the train,’ I said.
The absolute cheek of the man. How could he even say that with a straight face.
‘Yes but, look, listen, what happened back then, well, I feel differently about it now after watching the footage and I have a theory.’
‘Oh, do bugger off, Harrison. You race your way and I’ll race mine,’ I said.
‘I have a theory too. You did everything you could to win that race and you didn’t care about who might get in the way.
And I don’t feel any differently about what happened back then.
’ And then I did smile at him. I dialled it right up but he can’t have thought it was that wonderful as he slunk off back to Sam.
A little late, I noticed Noah and his camera near the barbecue.
He would have easily captured every word.
I didn’t look forward to seeing that on the TV.
Piece-to-camera
Cally: So, how do you feel your race is going, ladies?
Erin: Brilliantly! We’re doing really well with our money and managing to get lifts. I think we’re really strong contenders.
Cally: Martha, tell me about your motivations.
Martha: Motivations?
Cally: I mean, what made you want to race again after fifty years?
Martha: You invited me.
Cally: Yes, of course, but what I mean is, why did you decide to say yes?
Would you say you’re a very competitive person?
I’ve watched the footage of that first race and it makes for compelling viewing.
There seemed to be a bond blossoming between you and Harrison back then.
I must say, I was hugely invested. And then it seemed like you got left behind somehow and he won.
Has that stayed with you? Are you motivated by a need to beat him this time?
Martha: No comment.
Cally: Ha! You know this isn’t a police interview, don’t you?
Martha: It feels like it.
‘Cut. Okay, thanks both. Are you all right, Martha? You don’t seem your usual chirpy self,’ Cally said as we got up to leave.
‘Chirpy’ was not an adjective I’d label myself with and right now I still had Harrison’s face in my mind telling me it was wonderful to see me.
I didn’t consider myself a violent person but standing near that barbecue with his silly smiling face, I could easily have at least poked him in the eye.
Harrison was the chirpy one. So much for me letting it go.
‘Just a bit tired,’ I said.