39. Theo
Theo barely breathed until he spied Sarah at the departure gate for the flight back to Brisbane. She’d ignored his calls and texts, and he’d almost given up hope of ever seeing her again. But she was finally in his sight.
But now that he knew she was safe, a wave of anger washed over him. How could she just disappear like that? Especially with Bodie lurking around as her almost-certain stalker. Theo had experienced an endless cycle of worry from the moment he realised Sarah was unreachable yesterday evening. He’d cancelled on the dinner with Dan, Yu-jin, and the team, and when he realised Sarah wasn’t back at the hotel, he’d wandered aimlessly through the streets of Tokyo. But he knew there was zero chance of running into her unless she wanted to be found. He’d even contacted Gabe and asked for Bodie’s number, but Bodie hadn’t answered his phone either. And when he’d finally gone back to his room, he’d noticed her stuff was gone.
He hurried over to where Sarah was sitting. She didn’t see him until he was practically standing over the top of her.
She finally looked up, and he tried to define the expression on her face. Was that guilt? Fear? One thing was for sure. It didn’t look like she was happy to see him. His heart sank.
He sat beside her. ‘Hey.’
‘Hey.’
‘Are you okay?’
‘Not really.’
‘You should have come back to the hotel last night. I was worried about you.’
‘I went back briefly to get my stuff, but I don’t think me staying there would have been a good move.’
‘What do you mean? We could have talked things out.’
‘I’m not sure there’s anything left to talk about.’
‘So that’s it? You’re done?’
‘I just can’t see how we can make it work.’
Theo wanted to keep fighting for their relationship, but he was exhausted—and it seemed like Sarah wasn’t open to any further negotiation. He couldn’t force her to stay with him through sheer will.
‘Okay,’ he said quietly.
He saw a brief flash of something resembling surprise in her eyes, but it quickly turned to resignation. ‘Okay,’ she echoed.
The return flight was a red-eye, and they boarded just before 8pm. Theo was glad he could pretend to sleep on the way home so he wouldn’t have to make small talk with his now ex-girlfriend.
It felt like they’d barely dated in the first place. How could she now be an ex?
Sarah must have had the same idea, and she put on the airline-provided sleep mask as soon as she sat down.
He watched her for a few moments before nodding resignedly and switching on an in-flight movie. A thriller or action movie would be best. Nothing with romance.
He found a listing for Die Hard and pressed play.
John McClane would keep him distracted.
By the timethe plane landed at six thirty the next morning, Theo felt like death. Sleep had been elusive, so he’d watched four of the five Die Hard movies without a break. He hadn’t even been hungry and felt guilty he hadn’t been able to appreciate the business class offerings.
Once they were back in Brisbane, they lined up to go through customs, but they didn’t speak. He’d never had to spend so long with someone right after a breakup before, and it was hell.
After collecting their bags, Sarah gave him a small wave and disappeared through the arrival gate. He followed more slowly, not wanting to crowd her.
Was that it? Were they actually really, completely done?
He dragged himself to a taxi and drifted off in the back seat as the driver took him home.
His apartment still felt strange and new, and he wondered if he should go sleep at his mother’s place instead. But with Levi and Alexis living in the same building, he didn’t want to risk running into Sarah if she were to visit them.
He left his luggage inside the front door and unpacked his toiletries.
After a quick shower, he changed into an old pair of shorts and T-shirt and fell into bed.
Sleep came quickly.
After what felt like no more than five minutes, there was a knock at the front door.
He wanted to ignore it, but it got louder and more persistent. He stumbled out of bed and yanked open the front door.
‘What?’
Levi and Elias stood there. They grinned, not at all put out by his attitude. Elias held up a bottle of whiskey. ‘Drink?’
Theo wrinkled his nose. ‘Isn’t it a bit early for that?’
Levi tapped Theo’s watch. ‘I thought this thing cost a fortune. What time is it telling you right now?’
Theo glanced down. Wait. Was it 6pm?
‘I thought I’d only slept for a couple of hours.’
‘Jeez, dude. I thought you’d be used to reacclimatising after all the travel you do.’
‘Yeah, well…’ He didn’t want to say he’d never gone through a breakup on a work trip before. ‘I’m not sure I’m in the mood for drinking.’
‘Sarah told Alexis what happened. That’s why we’re here.’
‘Oh.’
The guys gently shoved Theo aside. Levi sat on the couch in the living room while Elias went in search of glasses. After finding three and filling them with ice, he brought them over to the coffee table and poured the whiskey. He handed one to Theo, who reluctantly accepted it. He really didn’t think drinking was a good idea, but one couldn’t hurt.
‘What happened?’ Elias asked.
‘I assume you saw the news articles.’
‘Yeah, but that’s just the tabloids. They have Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston reuniting every few weeks. Nobody believes them.’
‘Well, not nobody. And Yu-jin was acting like she wanted our relationship to be real. I don’t understand her at all. She wasn’t even that into me when we actually dated.’
‘Maybe she’s finally realised what a catch you are?’
‘I don’t think so. I’m sure it’s a strategic move for her career.’
‘What? And Sarah was jealous?’
‘No, I don’t think so. I mean, it might have been part of it, but I think it was more she thought she was dragging me down.’
‘But you explained that wasn’t the case?’
‘Of course I did. But I’m not sure she believed me.’
‘That sucks. Sorry, dude.’ Elias topped up the whiskey.
‘You’re not really just going to let her go like that, are you?’ Levi asked. He’d been quiet up until now. He held his glass between his knees and swirled the liquid, the ice clinking softly.
‘I don’t know that I have a choice,’ Theo replied. ‘Sarah said that she didn’t think we were meant to be and… maybe she was right.’
‘Bullshit,’ Levi said, looking up at Theo.
Theo was a little taken aback by the vehemence in Levi’s tone. ‘What?’
Elias sat back and watched them, a crooked grin on his face.
‘Look, I know I’m not the most… romantic guy on the planet.’
‘Understatement,’ Elias coughed into his hand.
Levi shot him a glare before turning back to Theo. ‘Be that as it may, I saw the way you were around her and the way she was around you. Even I could tell that the two of you were in love.’
‘Well duh. I never said I didn’t love her,’ Theo said.
‘So why are you giving up?’ Elias asked, sitting forward and re-joining the conversation.
‘Because maybe love isn’t enough.’
There. He’d said it. He’d always believed it, hadn’t he? His love wasn’t enough. He’d loved his dad, but that hadn’t been enough to make him stay. Why should he expect anything else from someone who wasn’t a blood relation?
‘Bullshit,’ Levi said again.
‘Concur,’ Elias said, lifting his glass in salute. ‘The problem isn’t love, my friend.’
‘So what is it, then?’
‘The problem is that you don’t believe you’re lovable.’ Elias raised his eyebrows as if he surprised himself with his insight.
‘As much as it pains me to say this, I agree with Elias,’ Levi said.
Elias looked shocked at his brother’s response. ‘Bro,’ he said, reaching over to lay his hand on Levi’s shoulder.
Levi shrugged it off, his eyes on Theo. ‘If you love Sarah, and I know you do, then you shouldn’t give up. You need to fight for her.’
‘And what if she still says no?’
‘Then at least you know you tried,’ Levi said.