23. Gavin #2
Dani proceeds to tell me about her conversation and my blood boils.
How this man worked so hard to get her, just to completely ruin it by not only treating her horribly, but by being an all-around douche, is beyond me.
But I’m so proud of her when she tells me how she stood up for herself and called him out.
I just need to make sure he doesn’t do something drastic because of it.
Sam doesn’t seem to know the difference between love and control, and that can be very dangerous.
“I’m sorry you had to deal with that. I’m sorry you had to deal with everything today. Do you want to take the day off? No one would blame you.”
“Hell no. If anything, working is a great way to get my mind off things.” She grabs my wrist to look at my watch. “In fact, I really should get back to it.”
I smack her lightly on the butt as she heads for the door. Dani opens it, then glances back, tossing me a quick, discreet air kiss before slipping out.
I’m completely gone for this woman—and absolutely screwed.
A few hours later, I notice Dani across the newsroom, nose deep in her computer, as if there’s nothing else in the world. That laser-focused intensity of hers still gets me every time. It always has. Her last show wrapped over an hour ago, but she’s still here, chasing something.
That’s my girl.
I make my way over to her, sitting on the edge of her desk.
“You do realize it’s past time to go home, right?”
She doesn’t even look up. Just waves me off.
“What has you so locked in over there?” I peek over her shoulder to see what’s on her screen. But it’s a bunch of bullet points that I can’t make heads or tails of.
“Just an idea for a new story. It’s still in the development phase, so no need to poke your nose in just yet.” She reaches over to turn off the screen, and spins around in her chair to face me. “Ready to go home?”
“Not going home. I’m taking you out.”
“You’re what?”
I kick her chair with my foot, sending it rolling towards the opening of the small cubical space. “Let’s go.”
I hear her fight back a small giggle. “Gavin, I’m not dressed to go out.”
“You’re dressed fine. Meet me at the truck in three minutes.” I don’t even wait for her to answer as I’m walking past her towards the exit.
It’s a quick fifteen-minute drive to where we’re going. We pull into a beach parking lot, and I jump out first, rounding the truck to open the passenger door for Dani.
“What a gentleman.” She smiles.
I hold out my hand for her. “Milady.” I grin.
“You’re such a dork.” It still doesn’t stop her from taking it and threading our fingers together. “So, is this another beach surprise? Got a swimsuit hiding somewhere?”
“No, no, nothing like that. I thought we could grab Mexican food at the shack you love so much, then sit and eat on the beach while the sun goes down.” It’s summer, so the sun’s been setting a lot later lately, perfect for when we get off work.
The smile she sends my way electrifies my whole body. Damn. She has no idea what she’s doing to me, does she? Or maybe she does. God, I hope she does.
She reaches up, fingertips brushing my cheek. “You okay?”
I blink, realizing I’ve been staring like an idiot. I shake myself back into the moment. “Yeah. Of course. Let’s go get you that food.”
I’m the last thing but okay.
The hole-in-the-wall is right next to the beach, and we get in the short line, going back and forth on what to get.
“It all looks so good,” I say. “What do you normally get again?”
“I switch between the carne asada and pollo asado burritos. And of course, today I can’t pick!”
“Then don’t.” I tilt my head toward the counter. “We’ll get both and share.”
“Sounds perfect.”
We get our food and make the short walk to a clear sandy area, a few dozen feet back from the shoreline.
I lay out the large blanket I brought with us, and we make ourselves comfortable.
It’s still warm enough we don’t need jackets, and the light breeze off the ocean is welcome after being cooped up inside all day.
Dani takes a large bite from her carne asada burrito, and I can’t help but laugh at the groan she makes.
“Good?”
She nods, still chewing, savoring each moment. “Best burritos in town.”
“I wouldn’t know. Haven’t had any since I’ve been here.”
Dani’s eyes go wide. “What? How is that possible?”
I shrug. “I don’t like Mexican food.”
“Hold on.” She puts down her food and wipes off her hands.
“Pennsylvania Mexican food doesn’t count.
Technically, you haven’t had real Mexican food, so you can’t say you don’t like it.
We’re fixing this right now.” She holds up the untouched pollo asado burrito and forces it towards my mouth. “Take a bite.”
I open and rip a big piece off.
“Holy crap, this is good.” It’s juicy and full of flavor. My eyes roll back as I fall onto the blanket.
“I told you!” Dani laughs uncontrollably.
“I will never question you again.”
We get back to our food, switching our burritos back and forth, even though she has to fight me a few times for mine.
After some small talk, and just watching the water, I decide to take a risk. “Can I ask you something? And I need you to really answer, not just tell me what you think I want to hear.”
She looks at me, slightly worried. “Okay?”
“When I didn’t show up… when I made that call… Did you ever debate coming after me? Being the one to fight for us?”
Her eyes shift away from mine, before finding their way back. She exhales. “I did. Every day. For a long time.”
There’s a stillness in the air. As if every seagull suddenly flew away, and the ocean froze in place.
“So, why didn’t you?” My voice is barely a whisper. “Why didn’t you try?”
“Because I didn’t want to be the only one fighting.”
I feel that in my chest. The ache. If only she knew the truth.
“You left,” she continues, voice shaky. “I waited. I waited longer than I should have, if I’m honest. I told myself maybe you needed space.
Maybe you’d come back on your own. But I also told myself…
” She takes a deep breath. “I told myself if I have to chase you just to keep you, maybe I’m not really being chosen at all. ”
I reach out to stroke the side of her face. I want to say something, but I let her finish.
“It wasn’t about pride,” she says. “It was about self-respect. But the truth is, I never wanted to stop fighting for us. I just wanted to know you were willing to fight too.”
I nod. It hurts, because if only she knew the real reason I pulled away. But it makes sense, considering what she thinks happened. But—I think it’s time to finally come clean. Just not now. Soon. I’ll find the right time. I’m done keeping secrets.
“I thought I was doing the right thing,” I force out. I reach for her hands, slowly stroking the backs of her palms. “I wasn’t then,” I say honestly. “Willing to fight, I mean. But I am now. And I know words don’t fix everything, but I’ll keep showing up. If you’ll let me.”
She looks at our hands, her thumb brushing against mine.
“I want to believe you.”
“Then let’s start there.”