Chapter 75 Kailin
KAILIN
"The greatest power often reveals itself in moments of greatest weakness."
—Shaman Saphir Fatewever
Each step up the stone staircase felt like scaling Mount Hope all over again, but without the benefit of a full night's sleep.
My legs burned, my lungs protested, and my head throbbed with each heartbeat.
Had I not been leaning heavily on Alar's arm, I likely would have ended up sitting down on one of those stairs and waiting until they sent a couple of medics for me with a stretcher.
"We can take another break if you want," Alar said, his voice gentle as he supported more of my weight. "The shaman will understand if you're a few minutes late."
I shook my head, immediately regretting the motion as it sent another wave of dizziness washing over me. "No, I just want this to be over so I can sit in a chair and faint."
He chuckled, tightening his grip around my waist. "It won't be much of a meeting if you sleep through it."
When Alar and Shovia had woken me with the summons from Saphir, I'd barely been able to drag myself from bed. The dreams or visions or whatever they had been had left me completely drained. Even now, after showering and eating a hearty breakfast, my limbs felt like they were filled with lead.
"I still don't understand why Saphir didn't just come to you," Alar muttered. "He must know what state you're in."
"How would he? I bet nothing like that has ever happened to him."
Alar stopped the climb, letting me catch my breath. "Did he tell you that?"
I hesitated. "After last night, everyone knows my secret, and you can guess what all those meetings were about, but until Saphir tells me what I can and cannot say, I'd rather not remark on what he shared with me."
"I get it." Alar propelled me up another step. "He told me some things that I'm not allowed to tell anyone either."
"I hate secrets," I murmured. "They feel like lies."
"Perhaps the shaman couldn't leave the command center," Alar suggested. "The riders are not back yet, so I assume things are still chaotic in Podana."
"The Shedun have been dealt with," I said. "But the riders are still dealing with the aftermath."
I knew there were casualties, but I hadn't asked Onyx for details. Once he'd told me that things were under control and I could rest, I fell into a dreamless, healing sleep. If not for the shaman's summons, I would have probably slept until tomorrow.
What I had done should have been impossible.
It made no sense. Yet here I was, climbing these stairs to report to Saphir and try to explain the unexplainable. I had no clue what to tell him except for the fact that I felt depleted as if I'd fought in the battle myself.
"I hope it never happens like this again," I whispered. "I mean, unless there is another emergency, and I need to warn everyone. If things like this keep happening to me, I'm not sure I will survive it."
If I were already bonded to a dragon, the immortality would have protected me, but there was a limit to what my body and mind could withstand while I was still human.
"Elu forbid." Alar leaned over and kissed the top of my head. "Do you know what triggered the dream?"
"No clue. I must have sensed something and tuned in."
Alar nodded. "Shovia told me that you had a bad feeling before the Shedun attacked your village. Maybe you've always had this ability within you."
I'd forgotten about that. So many details from that night were hazy in my memory, and if not for my journal entry from right before the attack, I wouldn't have remembered feeling uneasy mere hours earlier.
Perhaps Alar was right, and I'd always had the ability to sense the thoughts and feelings of birds and animals, and when they got nervous, I felt it too.
Finally, we reached the landing of the twelfth floor, and I leaned against the wall to catch my breath and regain some semblance of composure before facing the shaman. Alar stood close, his hand still on my waist, his eyes scanning my face with worry.
I was so immensely grateful that he had offered to accompany me even though he hadn't been summoned, and not just because I needed his strong body to lean on. I needed the man I loved to lend me his inner strength as well.
"Thank you for doing this for me," I said.
"No need to thank me. I would never have let you make this climb alone in your condition. I'll wait outside the shaman's office and help you back down when you're done."
"You're a lifesaver." I squeezed his hand.
I felt incredibly lucky to have him by my side.
He chuckled. "You are the lifesaver, my love. You saved countless lives last night."
The young cadet stationed outside Saphir's office, the same one from my previous visits, looked up as we approached. "Cadet Strom," he acknowledged with a nod. "Cadet Tekum?"
"I'm just here to assist Kailin. She was drained by the experience, and climbing eleven floors has been difficult for her. I can wait here, if that's okay with you." Alar waved a hand at the two chairs facing a fireplace that was not lit. "Or I can wait in the corridor."
"You can wait here." The cadet rose to his feet.
As the guy opened the door to Saphir's inner office, I wondered why the shaman didn't have a permanent assistant and chose a second-year cadet instead.
Stepping through, I saw Saphir standing by the window with Moki perched on his shoulder.
At my entrance, the shaman turned and dipped his head in greeting as if I were already a shaman and he was paying me respect.
Moki clapped his tiny hands, then jumped off Saphir's shoulder and onto the desk, where he proceeded to bounce up and down while projecting festive images into my mind, with many cat-monkeys like him dancing in a beautiful meadow with fauna that wasn't found on Aurorys.
"That's enough, Moki," Saphir admonished.
Looking like a chastised kid, Moki changed the images to a party with human children dancing in a more familiar environment.
"Forgive him," the shaman said. "Moki gets overexcited sometimes. He believes that the incredible manifestation of your power last night warrants a celebration." He waved at the chairs in front of his desk. "Please, sit down. You look ready to collapse."
"Thank you." I gratefully sank into the chair. "If not for Shovia and Alar waking me up, I think I would have slept until tomorrow. The experience was draining." It was my subtle way of complaining about his summons.
I believed that I'd earned the right, but on second thought, I realized that I hadn't done anything all that amazing. I hadn't fought the Shedun like the riders and the ground forces had, and they were all still working on clearing the dead and getting help for the wounded.
"You can return to bed after we are done here," Saphir said. "I wanted to get your perspective before you had a chance to forget any details of what you experienced. Onyx reported that you'd severed contact the moment he told you things were under control."
"I didn't want to stay and see the carnage," I admitted, closing my eyes for a moment and taking a deep breath before leveling them at the shaman. "How many casualties?"
His face fell. "The numbers are still coming in, but so far we’ve counted one hundred and six patrol members and sentries that were murdered before the main attack.
During the battle itself, one hundred and eight ground force soldiers fell fighting the Shedun, and there are many wounded soldiers who are being treated by the healers.
Some might not survive. One dragon was injured by a projectile but managed to land safely rather than crashing.
The healers are tending to him now, and his prognosis is good.
We don't have the number of civilian casualties yet, but thanks to you, there weren't many. "
I swallowed hard. "That's still too many."
"It is," Saphir agreed, "but it could have been much worse. Without your warning, the death toll would have been in the many thousands. The people of Podana were saved, Kailin, thanks to you and your foresight."
I shifted uncomfortably at his praise. "I'm not sure it was foresight.
Since I started drinking the tea, I have been dreaming about merging my consciousness with that of small animals and birds.
It was disturbing, especially since most of what they did was hunt or be hunted.
I must have been tuning into their consciousness somehow.
The alarm they experienced when they sensed the Shedun emerge from the ground must have reached me.
I saw the Shedun amassing forces outside of Podana, preparing for the attack. "
For a long moment, Saphir regarded me with an unreadable expression.
"What?" I finally asked. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Have you eaten today?" he asked, the abrupt change of subject catching me off guard.
"I... yes. Alar brought me a breakfast tray to bed." I hesitated. "I didn't have much of an appetite at first, but Alar insisted that I needed to replenish my reserves and practically spoon-fed me."
"Good," Saphir nodded, looking oddly smug, as if he was privy to some private joke. "I'm glad to hear that Alar is a good partner."
"He's the best."
Saphir's expression grew even more self-satisfied, as if he was taking credit for matching us up.
"I didn't," he said. "It was Fate's doing."
I felt heat rush to my cheeks. "You're reading my mind again."
"Not on purpose," he assured me. "You were just thinking very loudly. But considering that you've just shared your dreams with hundreds of dragons and some of their riders, you shouldn't be too bashful about me taking a peek."
"I still don't understand how that happened.
" I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear.
"It wasn't voluntary, at least not in the beginning.
I was just dreaming. But when I realized the danger, I cried for help, and luckily Onyx heard me even though he was asleep.
I was also able to reach Nyxath per Onyx's instructions. "