Chapter Seventeen
“And who ate your porridge this morning?” Don asked and slapped him on the back.
Darryn scowled, trying to concentrate on the computer. “I’m working.”
He shared an open plan office with his brothers.
They each had smaller offices they used when they needed more privacy, but they all preferred this open space.
Usually, it worked very well, because it made discussing their work easy.
But maybe he should have worked in his own office for another day or two.
He had been avoiding joining them here over the last two weeks since Hannah’s departure. Damnit, his brothers were all ecstatically happy, and he was miserable, even more miserable than he’d been before he told Hannah he loved her.
Since Hannah’s departure, they’d talked over the phone, they’d Skyped, they’d texted, they’d emailed one another, but it wasn’t the same as being with her, being able to touch her, to smell her, to love her.
He slept alone, he got up in an empty bed and empty house, he had his meals alone, and he hated every minute he was not with her.
And to add to his frustration, he found he kind of clammed up when he was talking to her over the phone or via Skype.
He had never been good with words. Showing her how he felt about her wasn’t a problem.
The problem was she wasn’t near him, so he couldn’t demonstrate what he felt.
And the longer she stayed away, the worse it became.
He didn’t want to talk to her about his day, his work. He wanted…her.
He was being irrational, but damnit, ever since he first laid eyes on Hannah Sutherland, his brain had stopped working rationally.
He somehow thought if he was among his brothers, he might not miss her so much. It wasn’t working, and to add to his frustration, he had to sit there and listen to his brothers’ smart remarks.
“How are you feeling?” Dale asked. “Head and shoulder working again?”
“I’m fine.” Darryn growled and continued looking at his computer.
“He doesn’t sound fine to me,” David said. “What do you guys think?”
“It’s not as if he’s been Mr. Sunshine over the last two years, but lately he’s downright grumpy,” Dale complained.
Irritated, Darryn looked up. “I’m right here, you know? You want to say something to me, say it.”
“I don’t know why you’re so grouchy. I thought you got the girl,” David said innocently.
“Yes, damnit, I got the girl, but she…she’s in New York. She’s working,” he snapped and again tried to concentrate on what he was supposed to be doing.
“Women work,” Dale said. “Zoe still works as an interior designer. She flies to London in two weeks.”
“And you don’t mind?” Darryn asked.
“We discuss our schedules and, whenever possible, I go with her.” A grin nearly split his face in two. “Just so happens I can go with her this time.”
“Caitlin still sees patients,” Don said.
“Of course it helps that she now has her rooms adjacent to the house. With Donato getting bigger, it’s more difficult, but we try to work our schedules out so one of us is always with him.
It’s not always possible of course, but we have the loving grandmas on standby. ”
“And Dana still teaches. I actually thought she would stop working once we were married, but she loves what she does.”
“But they don’t work halfway across the world all the time,” Darryn said. “She’ll be back in a week’s time, but then she’s off again somewhere and then she’ll be away for months!”
“Oh, man you’ve got it bad.” David grinned. “Have you told her you loved her?” Dale asked.
“Of course, I damn well told her!” Darryn exclaimed. “What a bloody stupid question!” A blessed silence fell over the office.
Darryn tried to concentrate on his work.
“You could go with her when she has to be away,” Dale said.
“Yeah, what you do, you can do anywhere and, frankly, if you’re going to be this grumpy every time she leaves, you may just as well go with her,” David said.
“And…” Don began, but Darryn had had enough. Swearing, he got up and grabbed his computer.
“I’ll be working in my office,” he snarled and stormed out.
*
“Enjoying New York?” Caitlin asked, and Hannah smiled as she closed her apartment door behind her.
Balancing the cell phone between her chin and her shoulder, she kicked off her shoes, threw down her bag, and flopped down on the couch. “It’s spring over here, so yes, New York is lovely.”
“And the rehearsals for the show?”
“It’s fun. I’m enjoying it.”
“But?” Caitlin asked.
“But nothing,” Hannah said, trying to sound cheerful. “We’ve been so busy, and the days are crazy, I…”
“Miss Darryn?” Caitlin interjected, clearly amused.
Hannah sighed. It was no use, Caitlin knew her too well. “Yes, I do. Something crazy. I’ve been in love with him for two years, during which time I hardly saw him but now, after we’ve been together, I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, damn it, I can’t stop thinking about him! This is crazy!”
“Surely you talk over the phone or Skype?”
“Yes, of course we do, but with the time difference and our schedules, it’s not always possible.”
“But you’re back in a week?”
“Yes, but I have to leave again after a month. I have to be in Europe from middle of June probably until October. And then I’ll have to go to New York for the Victoria’s Secret’s show, which means I’ll only be back, oh hell, I don’t know when!” Hannah nearly wailed.
“Sounds to me like you have decisions to make,” Caitlin said softly.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean you’re obviously not happy being so far away from Darryn, and there is a very simple solution.”
“Oh, yeah? And what is that?”
“Marry Darryn, stay with him. Help manage the children’s foundation you’re involved with from Cape Town, and do the odd modeling gig whenever you feel like it.”
Hannah didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “Simple? There is nothing simple in your suggestion! First of all, I’ve worked very hard to be where I am today; I don’t know whether I want to simply drop everything for a man.”
“So when will you want to stop, do you think?” Caitlin asked.
“I don’t know, there never has been a reason to think about quitting. In a few years, probably, when I’m ready.”
“So the fact that you’re now in a relationship doesn’t change how you feel about being away so much?”
“Am I? In a relationship, that is? Which brings me to my second point: I can’t marry a guy who hasn’t asked me to marry him!
Yes, he told me he loves me, but he hasn’t said it once since I’ve been in New York.
We could be brother and sister the way he talks to me.
It doesn’t sound as if we’re in a ‘relationship.’ Maybe he’s found someone else, maybe—”
“Hannah, stop!” Caitlin exclaimed. “Listen to yourself!” She sighed.
“You’re a gorgeous woman. Any man would be lucky to be near you, and Darryn has been in love with you ever since I met him.
You’ve been through this horrendous ordeal with a madman, and when Darryn finally knew what was going on, he left without a suitcase to be with you.
And, Hannah, once the Cavallos fall in love with someone, that’s it for them. Look at all of them!”
“The obvious difference is they all wanted to get married. Darryn hasn’t said a word again about love, never mind about getting married. And it’s fine. I’d rather know now that he’s not going to stick around, than find out later like Mom did.”
Caitlin sighed audibly over the phone. “Oh, Hannah. You were younger than me and Zoe when Dad left. I didn’t think his leaving would also leave a scar on you.
Dad is…Dad.” She laughed. “I don’t think I ever told you, but when I realized how I felt about Don, I wanted to see Dad.
I wasn’t sure why. We met at the Waterfront, and while we were talking, he was shamelessly ogling a woman at a nearby table.
And then I realized—Don is so different.
He has eyes only for me, like David has for Dana, and Dale for Zoe.
Not all men are like Dad, thank goodness.
Watch the brothers and their dad. Their eyes are stuck on their loved one—it’s a wonderful thing to see. ”
“You sound like Mom,” Hannah said glumly.
“Darryn loves you, we can all see that.”
“But he hasn’t said anything again!”
Caitlin giggled. “Well, sweetie, it so happens that you have a mother who writes romance novels. I’m sure you can steal some of her ideas to make the telephone conversations …
how shall I put it? More interesting? Come to think of it, Mom’s stories may be too tame for what you need; I’ll send you a link for a book I heard about.
And remember, the poor man doesn’t always have to be the first to say or do anything.
We are twenty-first century women. I mean, look at you—you didn’t even wait for your knight in shining armor to rescue you from the dragon’s clutches—you clobbered the dragon with your high heel! ”
A giggle escaped Hannah’s lips, and soon she and Caitlin were laughing uncontrollably.
“Thank you, I needed a good laugh,” Hannah said after the giggles finally stopped.
“Call him. I’m sure he’d love to hear from you,” Caitlin ordered before they ended the call.
*
By five o’clock the next morning, Hannah was still wide awake, staring at her ceiling.
She couldn’t sleep. She’d cleaned her apartment, made sure her schedule was up to date, sent out emails, and scrolled through the books on her tablet, struggling to find something that would interest her.
And although she’d began reading one or two of the books, her mind was too busy to focus on the words in front of her, and she’d switched off the light at midnight, hoping to fall asleep.
But thoughts of Darryn kept her awake. No, make that longing for him kept her awake. She missed him. Badly. And Caitlin’s words also kept turning in her head. Marry Darryn. Stay with him.
Could she do that? Could she give up everything she’d worked so hard for? Her career was at a point where she was able to choose the jobs she wanted to do. If Darryn insisted she stop working, would she do that? Did she want to do that?
Her phone beeped. She sat up, switched on her bedside lamp, and looked at her phone. It was a message from Caitlin with a link. Frowning, she opened the link.
The link opened on a site where a book was advertised. On the cover of the book was the muscled chest of a very sexy cowboy. Giggling, she remembered Caitlin did say something about sending her a book she’d heard about.
She bent down to pick up her tablet where she’d dropped it the previous night and, sitting back against the pillows, opened the e-reader, clicked on the muscled torso, and started reading.
A few pages into the book, she grabbed an envelope that was lying on the side table and began to fan herself. Oh, my goodness—did people do this?
And the more difficult question: could she do this? Did she have the guts to pull this off? Out of breath, she put down the tablet, several interesting thoughts racing through her head.
She’d never thought of herself as brazen, but when she was with Darryn she had absolutely no shame. Loving him the way she did, it was easy to give everything of herself to him. But wow, this…? She glanced at the story again. This was taking bold to a whole new level.
Well, she wanted to know if he still loved her, still wanted her. This was one way to find out.
She picked up her phone and scrolled to Darryn’s number. Her finger hovered over his name. Inhaling deeply, she finally pressed it.