Chapter Two Aletta #2
Aletta blinked away tears, imagining how frightened so many families must be right now, how terrifying it was to think that someone might turn a Jewish person away for fear of retribution.
She knew it would break her father’s heart to ever be put in that situation, but she also understood he would do anything to protect his own family – most likely above all else.
It was a choice no one should ever have to face, but as she thought of the handful of Jewish children in her class, she wondered what might change.
Would they even be allowed to stay at school?
Would they be spared because they were children?
She glanced at the clock on the wall then as she dried the final dish, knowing she’d have to go soon to meet Cecilia. Being within the four walls of her apartment was beginning to suffocate her – no offence to her parents – and she needed to breathe in some fresh air and sit with her friend.
Aletta cleared her throat so her parents knew she was coming and that she could hear their conversation. They both fell silent and looked up when she entered the room.
‘Unless there’s anything else I can do, I’m going to meet Cecilia at the park.’
Her father smiled up at her, and she walked over to press a kiss to his cheek. She turned to her mother, touching her hand as she leaned in to kiss her too.
‘Don’t stay out past dark,’ her mother said. ‘We have to be careful now, even in our own neighbourhood.’
‘I won’t, I promise,’ she said.
Aletta went to her room, dabbed a touch of perfume to her wrist, put on some lipstick, and collected her bag. It felt strange to just go about her normal routine on the cusp of so much change, but if ever there was a time she wanted to be with her best friend, it was now.
When Aletta arrived at the park, she saw Cecilia sitting on the ground, her back resting against their favourite oak tree, a cigarette dangling from her fingers.
Aletta lifted her hand in a wave when Cecilia looked over, crossing the park and dropping down beside her, close enough that their shoulders were touching.
Cecilia offered her the cigarette and she took it. Aletta didn’t smoke often, but if there was ever a time to partake, it was now.
‘How did your parents react?’ Cecilia asked. ‘Is your mother all right?’
Aletta passed her back the cigarette and rested her head on her friend’s shoulder. ‘She’s better now that she’s had time to process it, but I can tell how scared they both are. I wish I could be a fly on the wall, listening to what they’re talking about now that I’m not home. How about yours?’
‘My mother was near hysterical,’ Cecilia said. ‘The moment she heard it on the wireless she ran to the boys’ bedroom and started to pack their clothes into suitcases.’
Aletta took another puff. She knew what Cecilia was telling her.
‘So, the decision is made? About the boys being sent away?’ Aletta asked. ‘How long do you think you’ll be gone?’
Cecilia was silent for a moment. ‘They, well, they want me to stay in the countryside now, too. They think I’ll be safer, and they want me to look after the boys so they’re not too much trouble for my aunt.’
Now it was Aletta who was silent. She’d never imagined being without Cecilia – never thought that anything would truly part them.
‘You could come too,’ Cecilia said softly. ‘We could look after the boys together?’
Aletta kept her head on her friend’s shoulder.
‘I can’t, not now that I have my own class.
I can’t just leave.’ She sighed. ‘It’s just so hard to imagine that everything’s changing, that the life we know .
. .’ She stopped talking, not even wanting to finish that sentence.
She also didn’t want to give up her job, but that decision might be taken out of her hands now.
She had no idea whether they would even be allowed to continue teaching.
‘My father told us that there are Dutch citizens doing everything they can to stop the Germans from advancing. They’ve even placed explosives on railway lines,’ Cecilia said. ‘They’re trying to stop the Nazis, but . . .’
Aletta lifted her head to look at her. ‘But what?’
‘Aletta, there’s, well, there’s something else I’ve been wanting to talk to you about,’ Cecilia said. ‘Something I’ve been sitting on for a while, since Thomas left.’
Aletta sat up properly and turned to face her, wondering what she could possibly have to say when they usually told each other everything. But she supposed if it was to do with Cecilia’s older brother, then it might have been a family secret.
‘The night Thomas left, he told me about an underground movement. He said there’s a group of people getting together to prepare for some sort of resistance against the Nazis.’
Aletta felt her eyes widen. ‘A resistance?’
‘He told me that they need more people to join, that they have meetings every week, but my parents forbade either of us from so much as speaking about it again.’
It had only been a few hours earlier that Aletta’s heart had raced as she’d hurried for home, but it was beginning to pound all over again.
‘What sort of things do you think they’d be doing?’ she asked. ‘Who are they hoping will join them?’
Cecilia lit up another cigarette and took a long drag before passing it to her.
‘I don’t know. All he told me was they were looking for as many young people as possible to be part of their underground network, to work against the Nazis, and he said there’s a similar movement taking hold in France.
But it would be a very dangerous affiliation now. ’
Aletta let her head fall back against the tree trunk as she digested Cecilia’s words.
She’d never heard anything about an underground movement, but if Thomas had mentioned it, then she didn’t doubt it was true.
She couldn’t deny that she was curious about the types of things they might do, and the people who might join such a group.
‘Would you ever consider joining?’ Cecilia asked. ‘Do you think your parents would let you? I mean, your father is already taking a stand by keeping his Jewish clients, right?’
‘Me? Joining a resistance movement?’ Aletta thought about it.
It wasn’t that she objected to the idea, but she didn’t even know what she’d have to offer them.
‘I don’t know. I mean, I’d like to think I was brave enough to be part of something like that, but .
. .’ Would I be brave enough though? To fight against the Nazis?
‘I know what you mean. I don’t know if I could do it.
’ Cecilia sighed. ‘Thomas told me they meet on Thursdays, but I’d have to write to him in code if I ever wanted to find out more.
Just promise me that you won’t tell your parents what I’ve told you.
I don’t want them thinking I’m a bad influence or anything. ’
‘I won’t, I promise,’ Aletta said. She doubted she’d ever be brave enough to go along to something like that, anyway.
They sat for a while in silence before she finally spoke again. ‘Do you really think they’ll make you stay in the countryside? That you won’t come home until the war is over?’
It was Cecilia dropping her head to Aletta’s shoulder now. ‘I hope not. Just promise me that you’ll write, because I don’t know what I’ll do without you.’
Aletta didn’t admit that she couldn’t imagine a week without her, let alone an entire war, and it only made her want to enjoy sitting in the park as darkness slowly fell around them all the more.
Without Cecilia, she would feel like she had no one.
When Aletta arrived home, she let herself in, locked the door and then took off her shoes. She didn’t want them clicking on the floor if her parents were asleep, but when she tiptoed down the hall, she saw the light was still on in her father’s office.
She was about to walk in when she heard her mother’s voice, so she leaned back against the wall instead. It wasn’t that she wanted to eavesdrop, but she found it impossible to walk past without listening.
‘I just feel like there should be more that I can do,’ her father said, and she could imagine the way he would be massaging his temples with his thumbs as he spoke.
‘They trust me, and they keep turning to me for help, for guidance, and it doesn’t matter which way I turn.
We’re running out of options to keep them safe. ’
‘You’re doing more than most,’ her mother said. ‘Truly Jan, you are, and I’m so proud of you for it.’
There was silence for a moment.
‘Those that are still here . . .’
‘Shhh,’ she heard her mother whisper, and she heard a shuffle and imagined that she now had her arms around him, comforting him. ‘One of the reasons I fell in love with you was your compassion, but there’s only so much one man can do. Can you help to arrange any more marriages?’
He shook his head. ‘I think the window for that has closed, and if Hitler continues on his current path of success, then it’s anyone’s guess what their fate will be.’
Aletta knew her father had been helping some of his Jewish clients to find non-Jewish husbands for their daughters.
He was the one who arranged payment, and she’d heard him say that some of the couples barely even met, they certainly didn’t live together, it was simply a business deal that involved the groom being compensated with a large sum of money.
But if it kept those girls safe, then she supposed it was worth every guilder.
‘Just promise me that if I’m caught helping them—’
‘Don’t say it,’ her mother said. ‘We will get through this together, as a family, like we always have. You just have to be careful, promise me that? Promise me that you’ll be careful.’
‘I promise,’ he murmured.
‘I love you, Jan, and I couldn’t survive you being taken from me, do you hear me? I couldn’t survive it.’
Aletta slid down the wall, quietly, until her bottom hit the carpet, and she pulled her knees up, hugging them tight.
The way her parents loved each other was something she’d never had to question, but hearing the worry in their voices, knowing how scared her mother already was at the risks he was taking, told her that she didn’t need to tell them about the resistance movement.
She’d never be brave enough to be part of it anyway, and the last thing her mother needed was something else to fret over.
But it wasn’t just her parents she was worried about.
Many of the children in her class were going to be frightened, and not just her Jewish ones.
They would all be scared about bombings and the uncertainty of what came next, and she resolved to do everything she could to keep things as normal as possible for them during school.
No matter what happened, she would keep teaching; she would show up for them every day, so at least while they were in her class, they could feel safe.