Chapter 33
Chapter Thirty-three
Peyton
Everywhere hurts. I try to open my eyes but I don’t have the strength to even lift an eyelid. I can hear whispers of conversation around me. My ears tune in to his voice, the only man I’ve ever loved.
“I want the best plastic surgeon flown in. I don’t care about the cost; I will not have her look in the mirror every day and be reminded of what that monster did to her.”
“We have a good plastics department here, I’ll have a word.”
“No. I don’t want good, I want the best. She gets the best.”
“Leave it with me.” I hear movement and then a hand closes over my own and a whisper soft touch brushes along my cheek.
“Come back to me, sweetheart. Open your eyes and show me you’re okay,” his voice is anguished.
I’m right here, Bennett, I’m okay.
But I can’t give him any signs that I’ve heard him, I can’t move a single muscle in my body. Darkness closes in again no matter how hard I fight it.
He’s talking again. His voice soothes me, even if I can’t soothe him in return. He’s always here, every time I’ve come round, I hear his voice. He needs to be getting rest too, someone needs to be looking after him.
“It’s been three days, shouldn’t she be awake by now?”
“Everyone is different. Her body went through a lot. We’re lucky she’s even breathing, Bennett, let’s give her time; her vitals are good, she’ll wake when she’s ready.” My boss’ voice answers.
I am ready, I scream in my head, but apparently my body doesn’t agree as darkness closes in again.
“Do you want to do it again, Mr Miller?”
“Yes, thank you.”
“Okay, I’ll give you some privacy.” I hear splashing and then a warmth on my face. A sponge bath, he’s giving me a sponge bath. I smile to myself, of course it doesn’t show on my face, though. I still haven’t been able to make myself wake-up.
“The police came again today,” he murmurs to me.
He’s always talking to me, letting me know he’s here, I just wish I could let him know I’m here too.
“I’ve been cleared. It’s unofficial, they’ve still got lots of reports to fill out, but they found the video he made.
I-I…” his voice breaks and I feel the hand that is wrapped around my own shake.
“Christ, sweet girl, I don’t know how you survived what he did to you.
I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t get to you in time. ”
Yes, you did. You saved me, Bennett. I’m alive because of you.
“Now you listen to me, you incredible girl.” It takes a second for me to place the voice. Jilly. “I need you to wake up, you hear me? I know your body is going through hell and I know you’re healing. But I need you to wake and heal my boy, because he’s not coping, dear. He needs you; we all do.”
I’m trying, Jilly. I’m really fucking trying.
“Darling girl, you look like shit,” I laugh internally as Harry’s voice breaks through, it’s the first time I’ve heard him.
“Your hair needs a wash, your face needs some sunshine and this color? Darling girl, just no. I’m burning this once you’re finally out of it.
” Only Harry could insult someone lying in a hospital bed who’s lucky to be alive.
“I need you to wake up, okay? I need my best friend back, and I need you to take your fucking cat!”
“I need you, Peyton. I need you so fucking bad. Please, sweetheart, open your eyes. Give me those beautiful blues.” I try to open my eyes again, they feel like they’re stuck down with super glue.
“I love you, I love you so fucking much. I won’t make it without you, sweet girl, I can’t live in a world where you don’t exist.” I try to move my hand, the one that’s currently swallowed by his own.
I swear I manage to shift my finger slightly but I can’t be sure.
Every part of me feels heavy; it’s like there’s a giant weight lying on me.
“Peyton?” Did he feel that?
I try harder, focusing every bit of my strength on my hand. My finger brushes against his, it’s miniscule, but it’s there. I know I moved it this time. I felt it, and so did he.
“Fuck, oh, thank fuck,” his voice is rushed and his hand squeezes mine tightly.
“Nurse,” he shouts and I hear feet rushing into the room.
“Mr Miller?”
“She moved her hand, she just moved her hand.” I can hear the relief in his voice.
“Let me get the doctor.”
“Hey, sweet girl.” I feel his hand brush my hair back from my face, and his lips press against my forehead.
“Fuck, I’ve missed you so much.” I’ve missed you too.
“Can you open your eyes for me?” His thumb strokes along my cheek bone.
“I know you’re hurting, and I know it’s hard, but I really need those baby blues. ”
It’s not easy, but with a lot of effort, more than I could have ever imagined, I manage to pry open the lids of my eyes.
I blink rapidly, the light of the room blinding.
Bennett, is off the bed in a flash and the lights are quickly turned off in the room.
He sits himself on the bed next to me and cradles my face in his large hands, his watery gaze meeting my own.
“There she is,” he whispers as a tear falls from his lashes.
He leans forward and presses his forehead to mine.
“I’m never letting you out of my sight.” A scratchy noise fills the space between us and I realize it was my bodies attempt at a laugh.
He pulls back, a look of pure adoration on his face.
“What do you need?” I open my mouth, but it’s so dry, nothing comes out — the Sahara’s got nothing on the current situation of my mouth. “How about some water?” he prompts and I slowly nod my head.
He reaches for a cup and jug on the table beside us, and pours a small amount for me. He places the cup against my lips and slowly tips the liquid into my mouth. I can honestly say it’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted in my life.
“Miss Lawson.” A doctor says as he walks into my room. I recognise him, but I can’t place his name at the moment, we’ve had very little to do with each other for work, and I’ve obviously been completely out of it as his patient.
“Mrs Miller.” Bennett interrupts before the doctor can say another word.
“I’m sorry?”
“It’s Mrs Miller, not Miss Lawson.”
“Oh, right, err sorry, I wasn’t aware.” The poor man is flustered. “Anyway, as I was saying, Mrs Miller, it’s good to finally see you awake. I’m Doctor Sanders, how do you feel?” I manage a shrug, my voice won’t co-operate yet and my body hurts too much to do anything else.
“I’m going to take that to mean that you’re in a lot of pain still?
” I give him a slow nod, and Bennett curses under his breath.
“We’ll up your morphine dosage.” I shake my head at him.
I don’t want to start relying on that, it’s far too easy to get addicted to it, I see it every day.
“We can manage it carefully, you don’t need to worry. ” I just shake my head again.
“Peyton, I don’t want you in pain. Let them give you more for now, we can re-assess when you’re better.” I turn my gaze on Bennett, my eyes narrow on him and I shake my head at him too. “Brat,” he mouths at me with a smile.
“You’re going to be a stubborn patient, aren’t you?” Doctor Sanders says with an amused lilt to his voice.
“She’s been stubborn since the day I met her,” my man mutters. I can feel my eyes getting heavy again, I’m not sure how much longer I can keep myself awake.
“I’ll let you get some rest Mis-Mrs Miller. As you know, it’s going to be a long, slow road to recovery, but it’s good to have you back with us.” He pops my chart back in its slot at the bottom of my bed and leaves Bennett and I alone.
“Get some rest, sweetheart, I’ll be right here when you wake.
” I’m shaking my head before he’s even finished.
“If you think I’m leaving you, you’ve got another think coming.
I will not let you out of my sight, I can’t,” his voice breaks on the last word, and tears fill my eyes at his pain.
“Shh,” he whispers as he sees my own anguish.
“It’s okay, you’re okay, you’re safe now.
” His arms wrap around me and he very gently hugs me, being extra careful not to hurt me.
I need him to get some rest, he looks shattered.
I move my hand a little when he releases me and lift the blanket slightly. He cocks his head at me and I raise my eyebrow at the chair it appears he’s been sleeping in.
“Peyton, I’m fine in the chair, I can’t sleep in there with you.
” He gestures to the small hospital bed.
I just nod my head at him, I’m already fed up with my lack of speech, I’ll be working on that when I next wake up.
“Sweetheart, what if I hurt you?” I shake my head at him, he could never hurt me.
He hesitates but he eventually climbs in with me, he lays on his side, but I gently push him to his back and lay my head on his chest, both of us being careful to avoid all the wires I’m attached to.
“This okay?” he questions, and I nod my head, my eyes already closing as sleep pulls me back under.