Chapter 15
Priest
It didn’t take long to get my girls up and into the truck.
I glanced into the rearview mirror and saw their wide eyes and worried expressions.
They knew that night time drives weren’t normal, therefore it must be a bad thing.
I fucking hated this. I didn’t want to be dragging them all around Tucson this late at night.
There’d been something in Wendy’s tone, though. Something she hadn’t wanted to say over the phone. So in the end, I’d woken them—Caitlyn insisted, silently, on coming with us—and here we were driving to the house.
I’d paid for at home care for Wendy. It was the option that had given my girls the most time with her.
Seeing their mom at home, although bed ridden, was still infinitely better than at a hospital.
I parked in the driveway and Jenny and I helped the girls climb out. As one unit we went into the house.
We were quiet about it. I didn’t want to wake up the night care nurse. Not until I found out what was going on.
“My babies,” Wendy called out softly as we came into her bedroom.
“I’ll be out here,” Jenny whispered to me, pausing by the door. Caitlyn went over and took her hand, wanting to wait as well.
I nodded and brushed a kiss over each of their foreheads before going into the room and shutting the door.
Wendy looked like hell. She’d lost even more weight since she’d left the hospital and her cheeks were gaunt and pale. The girls climbed onto her bed and she cuddled them close.
Despite the problems we’d had, Wendy had been a good mother to our girls. They were her world and I knew this wasn’t easy on any of them. It was fucking killing me, to see my daughters’ hearts breaking this way.
I gave them space, leaning up against the wall near the door. I watched, a silent guardian, as Wendy hugged, kissed, and whispered to them. These were her goodbyes. Had she gotten news from the doctor? She didn’t look well, but didn’t seem like she was fading either.
The last thing I was going to do was interrupt my children’s last moments with her to ask. There were tears. They even threatened to spill from my own eyes as I watched my daughters sob in their mother’s arms. I blinked them back, determined to be the rock they needed.
“I love you all so much,” Wendy whispered. “Go on now.”
The girls cried and flung themselves against her. Her eyes met mine and she silently begged for me to intervene. One by one, I picked up my daughters and carried them from the bed. Opening the door, I handed them over to Jenny.
She squatted down and they fell into her arms, sobbing. Jenny’s worried eyes met mine and my heart kicked in my chest when I realized she was crying too. The fact that she’d shed tears for Wendy, for my girls, just showed what a huge heart she had, and why I could never let her go again.
Turning my head, I saw Wendy watching Jenny and our girls from the bed. There was a speculative look on her face. I couldn’t begin to know what she was thinking at that moment.
“May I speak to her?” she asked me.
My brows shot up and I frowned. I didn’t get a chance to voice my thoughts before she spoke again.
“I’ll behave,” she promised with a tired smile.
Stepping out into the hall, I spoke quietly to Jenny. “She wants to talk to you.”
Jenny’s curls bounced as her head snapped up in surprise. Her eyes darted from me to Wendy, but she nodded. I squatted down and gathered my girls close, letting them lean into me as they cried. For their sake I needed to hurry this along, whatever it was.
Watching as Jenny stepped into the room and walked over toward the bed, I smoothed my hand over Gabby’s back.
It shuddered under my palm and though she wasn’t making a sound, I knew she was sobbing.
She tried so hard to hold it together for her sisters.
I wished she didn’t feel she had to be that strong. She took after me in nearly every way.
The girls settled down and I could just barely hear the conversation between the two women.
“Priest and the girls told me that I have you to thank for watching them while I was in the hospital.” Wendy stopped and a wry smile passed over her lips. “And for the clean house and food in my freezer.”
“Oh. I like to keep busy,” Jenny said with a tentative smile. “I hope you don’t mind that I made myself at home.”
Wendy blew out an audible breath, as though something were paining her. When the words finally came I knew it was them that caused the reaction, not the illness coursing through her body. “I don’t mind. I wanted to thank you.” She paused again, building up her nerve for something.
I watched them like a hawk. It didn’t matter how sick Wendy was, I wouldn’t allow her to say anything bad to Jenny. In the order of my priorities, Wendy was at the bottom of the list. I took care of her for my girls.
“May I ask you for a favor?”
Jenny’s wide eyes flicked over to me. I shrugged and waited, along with her, to see what my ex-wife wanted from her. Jenny made an encouraging noise, so Wendy went on.
Wendy’s eyes moved over and settled on the little girls in my arms. She kept them there as she spoke to Jenny.
A single tear tracked down her face. My heart turned to stone.
Seeing the only tear that Wendy had cried through this entire ordeal confirmed my suspicions. I knew why she’d called us over here.
“I see the way he looks at you,” Wendy told her. Jenny didn’t seem to know what to say, so she remained silent. “They need a mother. Will you help him watch over them?” Wendy’s eyes finally locked onto Jenny, as she waited to see what Jenny would say.
Jenny’s jaw dropped and it looked like she tried to speak only to have nothing come out. She cleared her throat and tried again. “I’m not sure that’s my choice to make,” she said quietly, looking over at me again. Her cheeks flushed and she dragged her gaze away.
Wendy smirked at her. “Trust me. I’ve known him almost my entire life.
” She paused as though it was just hitting her that this was the end of that life.
Sadness seemed to creep over her. “He’s going to keep you, Jenny.
” Her hand gripped Jenny’s wrist as desperation moved in.
“And I need to know that my girls will grow up with a mother to help take care of them.” She swallowed hard.
“As much as I want to be the one to do that, I can’t. So, I’m asking you.”
Both Jenny and I knew how hard it was for her to be asking this favor. Jenny’s other hand came over the top of Wendy’s in a reassuring grip. “I’ll be their mother. I’ll love them as fiercely as if they were my own,” she promised.
The breath exploded out of me. I hadn’t realized I’d been holding it. Hearing those words from Jenny set both Wendy and me at ease.
Wendy let go of her arm and settled back against the pillows again. “Thank you.”
Jenny nodded, reaching out to squeeze Wendy’s hand again before she left her side. I passed the girls, who’d calmed down by the time the exchange was over, over to Jenny. She started to usher them out toward the living room.
I quietly thanked her, waiting for her nod of acknowledgement, then shut the door, barricading myself inside with Wendy. I turned and studied her. The machines she was hooked up to were beeping and clicking.
She sniffled into a tissue and I gave her a chance to compose herself. When she finally looked up, I saw the resignation in her eyes. My heart sank. This was hard on her, and was going to be so much more difficult for my daughters. It made my chest ache for them.
“Grant.”
I went over and sat on the edge of her bed. My hand covered hers and I marveled at how bony it had become. I swallowed hard as she began talking.
“I can’t do this.” Tears filled her eyes. “I hurt so badly, Grant. I can’t keep going.” A sob tore from her throat. “But I can’t end it on my own.” She swallowed hard, squeezing my hand and her voice came out as a whisper. “I’m too much of a coward.”
My eyes closed briefly and I rubbed my thumb over the back of her hand. Somehow I’d known tonight would be her last night, but it hadn’t occurred to me when she’d called what she would ask me to do.
When I opened my eyes again she was watching me with a pleading look. “It’s not fair to ask this of you, but…can you help me? Please?”
Jesus. I’d done some shitty things in my life. Some that were considered heroic. I’d killed a lot of people, but I’d always managed to convince myself that they deserved it. Could I end the life of my ex-wife? The mother of my children?
One look into her eyes told me how serious she was. The desperation there conveyed more about the pain she was in, and how badly she needed it to end, than words ever could. This was well past begging. This was nearly a demand. So, could I do this?
Yes. Because she was in pain and begging me to.
The real question was, could I do it without losing myself?
Could I keep this from my girls without it tearing me apart.
They wouldn’t understand. I’d never be able to tell them the truth.
For just a moment I hated Wendy for putting this on me, for what the price would be.
That feeling faded quickly though. If I were in her position…
I would ask someone, too. It just so happened I had more people in my life than she did. Which meant this was up to me.
“Alright. Give me a minute.” I’d locked the bedroom door, but there wasn’t anyone pounding or begging to get back inside. I knew Jenny was taking care of my girls.
Pulling out my cell, I hit a number and waited while it rang.
“Hey. Where are you?” Lockout asked.
“Wendy’s.”
“I see.” His tone was grim. He knew me being here in the middle of the night wasn’t a good thing.
I took a deep breath. “Lock. There’s something I need to do. I thought I had Cade’s number, but I don’t.”
The silence on the other end of the line was deafening. Finally, he spoke. “If you’re calling the Austin MC for something, I’m going to need to know why, Priest.”