Chapter 10 #3
‘So,’ Ottilie said, choosing not to address Zoe’s dubious compliment, ‘he’s moved here from Spain? And it’s just him and his daughter?’
‘As far as I know,’ Zoe said. ‘Billie’s mum died…
’ As soon as she’d said it, Zoe wished she hadn’t.
It wasn’t exactly confidential information, but it had been shared with her during a clinic appointment.
‘Please don’t spread that around the village,’ she added. ‘I’m not sure it’s common knowledge.’
‘I won’t say a word,’ Corrine said, though it was clear from the expressions on their faces that all three women wanted Zoe to share more.
She wasn’t worried about trusting them, but things often slipped out when people didn’t mean them to.
If information she’d been given at clinic became gossip in the village, Billie might think she was the culprit and never share anything with her again.
Zoe couldn’t allow that to happen, and so she decided that was all she was going to give out for now.
If Billie or Alex wanted people to know their circumstances, then they would let them know, and it wouldn’t come from Zoe.
‘I have to say’ – Corrine lowered her voice – ‘that Alex. He’s easy on the eye…’
Ottilie’s mouth fell open, and Stacey burst out laughing.
‘Corrine! You little madam! Better not let Victor hear you say that!’
‘Well…’ Corrine blushed. ‘I’m only human – how could I not notice?’
‘I’m surprised at you for looking,’ Stacey said.
Ottilie let out a giggle. ‘Ignore her, Corrine. I noticed too. Of course, I’m madly in love with Heath so there’s no contest, but even I’ve had a little look.’
‘Well, I wouldn’t kick him out of bed for eating crackers,’ Stacey said.
‘You’re spoken for too!’ Corrine replied with a half gasp, half laugh.
‘I know, but like Ottilie says, no harm in looking, is there?’ She turned to Zoe. ‘Looks like it’s on you, as the only singleton here. You’ll have to take him on.’
‘God no!’ Zoe said, reaching for her cup. ‘Another man is the last thing I need right now. I can’t get rid of the one I’m divorcing without taking on anyone else.’
‘He’s still hassling you?’ Ottilie asked, her expression now one of sympathy.
‘Not hassling, exactly,’ Zoe replied, though she certainly felt hassled. ‘But he’s around…makes his presence felt…’
‘Turns up when he’s not wanted,’ Ottilie finished for her.
‘Does he?’ Stacey asked. ‘That must be awkward.’
‘It’s not ideal,’ Zoe agreed. ‘We always said we’d stay friends, and I know he’s only looking out for me, but I wish he wouldn’t.
Is that a bit mean of me? I mean, we’re getting divorced because we don’t want to be together as a couple any more, but he’s acting like nothing’s changed, we’re still married and I’m just working away from home. It’s…’
Zoe paused. Everyone was hanging on her every word, and despite how much she liked and trusted the women around the table, she suddenly felt like the newest subject of village gossip. She was doing a good job of making herself that. Had she overshared? It wasn’t like they could do anything to help.
‘I take it you’ve spoken to him about it?’ Stacey said.
‘You don’t know him. He’d be so upset and offended if I said something like that.’
‘Would it matter if he was? You’re getting divorced anyway.’
‘He’s having a tough time of it at the moment, and I don’t want to make things worse.’
Stacey picked up her cup. ‘Sounds to me like you’ll have to say something whether you want to or not. Otherwise you’re going to have him coming around all the time, and you just said you didn’t want that.’
‘I know. It’s hard.’
‘I don’t think it is,’ Stacey said, and Corrine nodded her agreement.
‘Sometimes,’ she said gently, ‘you have to be cruel to be kind.’
‘She’s right,’ Ottilie said. ‘Would it help if I had a word with him? I could say you?—’
‘I appreciate the offer,’ Zoe said, ‘but I don’t think it would be a good idea to get anyone else involved. I’ll talk to him when I find the right moment.’
There was a brief silence, and Zoe couldn’t help but feel it contained some silent judgement of her words. They all doubted she’d pluck up the courage to say what she needed to. She doubted it herself most of the time, though she knew she’d have to.
‘Magnus wants to know when you’re going to come to film club,’ Ottilie said. ‘You know it’s a rite of passage for all new Thimblebury residents that they have to go to Magnus and Geoff’s little cinema.’
Zoe turned to her. ‘Really? Must I?’
‘Well, you’re new, and Magnus loves having new people there. I think you’d make him ever so happy, even if you only go once.’
‘Oh, I don’t know. I don’t really like arty, high-brow films. I don’t understand them.’
‘Neither does anyone at film club,’ Stacey said, and Ottilie let out another giggle.
‘That’s true! Most weeks you’re more likely to get a showing of Dirty Dancing than The Piano . It’s only a bit of fun, an excuse for everyone to get together.’
‘I don’t know…’ Zoe sipped at her tea. ‘I don’t think so. Besides, it’s such a trek down the hill at night – I don’t know if I can be bothered. I mean, I know I do sometimes go into the village after dark, of course, but still…the road can be challenging later on…’
‘I mentioned that, and Victor’s planning to put lighting up,’ Corrine said.
Zoe’s face fell. ‘Oh, I didn’t mean…You didn’t tell him I was complaining?’
‘No, don’t worry. Melanie had been saying for years it needed lighting, but then she got so used to driving it, she gave up nagging us.
I did say to Victor when you first moved in that we ought to make it a bit safer for you.
In fact, I think Victor had a conversation about it with the new fella at Hilltop too.
They share some of the road, after all, so they might do it between them. ’
‘That would make me feel a bit easier,’ Zoe admitted.
‘And as for film club,’ Corrine continued, ‘we could do our own up here. I’d be glad of the company of someone who wants to watch something other than Gardeners’ World and war documentaries of an evening. You’d all be more than welcome to come and have a little film night with me.’
Zoe gave a warm smile. She suspected that what Corrine was really saying was that if Zoe ever felt lonely in her little cottage all that way out of the village, she should seek company at Daffodil Farm.
‘Perhaps we could ask that young girl at Hilltop too,’ Corrine added thoughtfully. ‘She’d likely say no, but there’s no harm in making the offer. She seems right lonely, and it must be hard being in a new place where she doesn’t know anyone, and pregnant to boot.’
‘I get the impression she doesn’t mind her own company,’ Ottilie said. ‘Not that I’ve spoken much to her.’
‘I think there’s more to it than that,’ Zoe put in, and when the others turned expectantly to her, she simply shrugged.
‘Sorry, you know how it is. I can’t really say more than that, but I do feel she needs the company more than she’d ever want to admit.
I think she’d do a lot worse than come over here to be spoiled by Corrine every once in a while – even if it was only for the cake. ’
‘She needs feeding all right,’ Corrine said. ‘It wouldn’t hurt to take some good home cooking over to them. I think I’ll make a pie and take it over tomorrow.’
‘That’s me officially jealous.’ Ottilie smiled. ‘I’d be your instant best friend for life if you were making me a pie.’
Corrine beamed at the compliment. ‘You know my guardian angel can have one any time she likes.’
Corrine and Ottilie shared a look of understanding and deep affection, and Zoe felt a pang of real jealousy.
Or rather, not so much jealousy but longing.
She was envious of how settled Ottilie was here, how much of a shared experience she had with other women in the village, whereas Zoe felt keenly her status as recent arrival.
She had work to do before she became a real part of the community.
She’d persuaded herself she didn’t care, that she had no plans beyond her six-month trial at the surgery, but that wasn’t true.
She wanted to belong because ever since she’d lost the baby and then Ritchie, she’d felt lost in life too.
Reflecting on it now, however, it struck her that was one thing she had in common with Billie.
Perhaps, she thought, that was the way to connect.
If she could use her outsiderness to some advantage, then perhaps she could turn it into a force for good.
‘If you’re going over tomorrow, Corrine,’ she began slowly as the plan formed in her head, ‘I’d like to come with you – if that’s all right.’
Stacey laughed. ‘Aye, aye! We set her a challenge to take on the new man and she’s gone for it!’
‘No!’ Zoe laughed herself, though it was more self-conscious.
‘That’s not it at all! I only meant it would be good for me to check in on Billie, and this is a way to do it that won’t seem obvious.
Like Corrine said, she seems lonely, and that can’t be good for a girl of her age, especially one who’s pregnant. ’
‘Yeah, you keep telling yourself that,’ Stacey fired back with a grin. And then she looked up at Corrine. ‘This cup of tea is all very well, but weren’t we promised a girls’ night? Shall we open the wine I brought up?’
‘I can’t drink it,’ Ottilie reminded her, but Stacey’s grin only spread.
‘Aww, shame, we’ll have to drink your share, won’t we? It’s a hardship, but for you, I’m willing to bear it.’