Chapter 15 #2
‘No, I’ll have a snowball. It’s Christmas, and I don’t want to be the only person sitting here without one.’
Ottilie handed Anthony to Heath. ‘I’ll get you a drink, Flo. We’ve still got some of that scrumpy you like… that’s nice and flat, and it’s got a kick to it. Will that do?’
‘It’s not gone off, has it?’
‘No,’ Ottilie said with patience that Zoe marvelled at. ‘It hasn’t gone off. Hang on a minute.’
Alex checked his watch. ‘We should be going.’
Zoe drank the rest of her snowball. They still had twenty minutes until she had to be there, and it would only take five for them to get to the hall, but he’d said what she’d been thinking – it was time to make an escape.
Ottilie and Heath knew how to handle his cantankerous grandmother, but Zoe found her trying at the best of times.
She often thought it said a lot for Ottilie’s gentle nature, and the fact that she was far more patient than Zoe could ever be. She got up with her empty glass.
‘I’ll just go and let Ottilie know and make sure she’s all right with anything Louisa might need.’
Ottilie was staring into space when Zoe found her in the kitchen.
‘Hey… everything all right?’
‘Huh…?’ Ottilie blinked and then smiled. ‘Oh, yes. I was just having a mum moment.’
‘What’s that?’
‘Baby brain. Does it ever go away? I feel as if I can only think in cotton wool some days. I have to admit it worries me, the thought of going back to work like this.’
‘You’ll be fine. I’m sure everything will sharpen up when you’re using your noggin a bit more.’
‘It is true that the most taxing conversation I have these days is checking with Heath that he’s changed Anthony’s nappy before we go to bed.
Unless you count the mad, one-sided conversations I have with Anthony.
I’ve got goo-goo gaga down to a fine art.
I could teach a degree in it.’ She reached for the cider and poured some into a glass.
‘We don’t have to leave Louisa if it’s too much for you—’
‘Oh, stop it! Would you just bugger off to your panto? We’ll be fine. It’s for a couple of hours at most – even I can manage that. And Flo’s here now. She can be snippy, but she is good with kids.’
‘I’ll take your word for that. I’d run a mile at the thought of her babysitting me.’
‘It’s lucky neither of ours can run then, isn’t it?’
‘I’d crawl. I’d shuffle on my belly if I had to.’
Ottilie laughed and reached to pull Zoe into a hug. ‘I’ll see you later. Have fun at the panto. Between you and me, I’d rather be here with two babies than sit through that.’
‘In about an hour I might agree with you,’ Zoe replied. ‘Thanks again for this. She might not know it, and it’s hardly the event of the century, but I think Billie really needs this night off from motherhood.’
‘I’m sure you’ll all have a lovely time.’
Alex came in with his and Billie’s glasses. ‘Where do you want these?’
‘In the sink, thanks,’ Ottilie said.
Alex dumped them and then turned to Zoe. ‘All sorted? Ready to go?’
‘Ready,’ Zoe said. ‘Ready and looking forward to it.’
As promised, they’d arrived early to help Magnus with tickets and seating guests, and even though it was the time they’d agreed, he looked distinctly harassed as he rushed over to meet them at the door.
‘Oh, thank goodness… I thought you might not come!’
‘Well, we’re here and reporting for duty,’ Zoe said. ‘Everything going all right? No divas throwing tantrums backstage?’
‘No, but Fliss’s costume doesn’t fit… though it did last week, so goodness knows what she’s been eating. And half the glitter has come off Charles’s wig… the front door of the house keeps falling down, and Stacey’s already pissed. Geoff told her not to open the wine this early, and she knows how—’
‘Breathe!’ Zoe put a hand on his shoulder, and Alex went around the other side and did the same.
‘It will all be great,’ he said.
‘And if Stacey is pissed, and the door to the house falls down, the show will be all the funnier for it. Whoever wants a perfectly rehearsed panto anyway?’ She was about to add more words of encouragement when she noticed some new arrivals at the door.
‘Our first guests,’ she said, nodding at them. ‘I’d better go and do my job.’
‘Oh, bless you,’ Magnus said. ‘I’m very grateful for your help.’
‘Happy to give it,’ Zoe replied. She turned to Billie. ‘Want to give me a hand while your dad does the stewarding bit?’
Billie followed her, but there was really very little for her to do.
Most of the guests stopped at Zoe with their tickets and had a chat because they all knew her well from the time she spent almost every day in the village and around the surgery, where Billie wasn’t so easily recognised.
She didn’t go down into the village nearly as much, and she didn’t interact with many people when she did, and so it was hardly surprising to Zoe.
But it was sad, Zoe thought, because the lack of attention paid to her only served to reinforce what she suspected Billie was already feeling – that she didn’t belong in Thimblebury in the way that Zoe and Alex did.
And Zoe didn’t blame her for it. Billie had tried, but it hadn’t always been easy.
It didn’t help that the only people she had become close to, like Fern and Maisie, hadn’t come.
In fact, there was nobody under the age of thirty in the room, and Billie must have felt the effect of that too.
‘Do you want to do the tickets and I’ll hang coats up for people?’ Zoe asked after a ten-minute stint where Billie had only been able to stand at her side and watch her work.
‘I’ll take the coats,’ Billie said. ‘You’re faster at this bit.’
She brightened up at the sight of Georgia and Brett coming in. Georgia had a sparkly dress on, and Billie gave a low whistle. ‘It’s only the village hall, girl!’
‘I know.’ Georgia laughed as she took off her coat and gave a twirl. ‘But where else am I going to wear it? I never go out, and it makes a nice change from being in a tracksuit covered in baby sick.’
‘Tell me about it!’ Billie said. ‘Want me to take that?’ She nodded at Georgia’s coat.
‘It’s all right; I’ll keep it with me in case I get cold… or in case Emilia decides to phone me and make me go home because she can’t cope with William. She’s only babysitting under extreme duress as it is. If he kicks off, she won’t be happy – and he’s teething so it’s likely.’
Billie nodded and looked strangely redundant again as Zoe exchanged a brief word with Georgia herself.
If she got a chance later, she’d ask Georgia if she could find time to visit them at Hilltop, or else they could go to see her.
For a while, despite the fact that Georgia was a good thirteen years older than Billie, just as Zoe was, they’d bonded over their babies, and Georgia was such a lively character she could have bonded with anyone anyway.
Zoe could tell Billie liked her. But like everyone, she’d become embroiled in life and the visits had lessened.
After another ten minutes, Zoe scanned the seats. The hall was a buzz of anticipation, ringing with the lively chatter of people catching up, the air warm from the heating and with the aromas of the complimentary mulled wine provided by Geoff, the stage sparkling with tinsel and lights.
‘That’s everyone in,’ she said. ‘And it’s nearly time to start, so if they’re not in by now, they’re going to have to find their own seats and hold on to their coats. Your dad’s already sat down.’
Billie nodded, and they went to join him.
A couple of minutes later, the lights went down…
and then went back up again… and then down, and then back up, and then everyone started to laugh, and the poor landlord of the local pub blushed as he tried to get to grips with the lighting desk.
And then Magnus stepped out onto the stage before he’d managed it, with a shrieking whine from his microphone that had everyone covering their ears.
When they’d finished laughing at the various technical malfunctions, he introduced the show, and then the lights went down and stayed down, and it began.
In the end, though Zoe had been looking forward to the performance, she hadn’t been able to concentrate on it.
As hard as she tried, she couldn’t help but notice from the corner of her eye how restless Billie was, almost from the start.
She’d watch for a minute or so, and then she’d glance towards the doors, or else pull out her phone to look at the screen, and Zoe wondered if she was checking the time.
And she’d let out frustrated bursts of breath, or else fiddle with her hair, or the fasteners on her shirt, or twiddle the silver ring she always wore on her middle finger.
Things went on this way for twenty minutes.
There was another twenty to go before the interval, but Zoe was already wishing it here, just so she could talk to Billie to see what the problem was.
Maybe it was simply a case of her missing Louisa, concerned about what might be happening at Ottilie’s.
That would certainly explain the constant checking of her phone.
When she could stand no more, Zoe leaned over and whispered to Billie. ‘Are you OK? Not worrying about Louisa, are you?’
Billie shook her head, gaze on the stage.
She quickly realised she wasn’t going to get much more than that, and so Zoe sat back in her seat, but not before she noticed a silent question from Alex.
She shook her head to signal that it was something she’d have to fill him in on later.
The rest of the audience were laughing, but Zoe, distracted by Billie, had missed the joke.
So had Alex, distracted by their exchange.
Not wanting to miss the next one, Zoe turned her attention back to the performance, but not before she heard a loud sigh coming from Billie, who was looking down at the phone in her lap again.