Kingston
L andon burst through my doorway and interrupted my thoughts, not for the first time, in a state of complete disarray over Quinn Everly.
“, you have to do something about this.”
Did he think I’d gone blind?
Did he not see how obvious it was?
I glanced at the plans in front of me, the outlines for the conversion of the cabins requiring my approval in the midst of everything else. “I am doing something about it, Landon.”
He shook his head adamantly, the wavy strands of his dark hair flying. Another dead giveaway for his distress. “No, something else. Something—I don’t know. But this plan is?—”
I raised my eyebrows as I would to anyone who questioned my decisions. Landon retreated. Even though he looked furious about it.
Good.
“Landon, I don’t understand why you’re so worked up.”
I spoke calmly as I crossed out a trap door design and checked my approval on another, and I caught the clenching and unclenching of his fists from the corner of my eye.
“You knew the plan. You understood what you had to do at the Knights’ Quorum, and I thought you’d accepted it.”
I sighed, failing to see the point in second-guessing choices anymore. My every move had been recalculated three times over. I could only act and move on to the next.
Defending that strategy to Landon, when he knew the consequences I’d faced—when I’d been burned for wavering over my last decision—took more patience than I had today.
“I’m aware you didn’t like it. Neither of us wanted it to go this way. But Quinn responded better than we could’ve hoped. Why question it now?”
“Yes, but that was before?—”
I lifted my eyes to find him fighting back the truth. “Before what , exactly?”
He opened his mouth to say something and then clearly thought better of it. His teeth ground together so hard, I heard the squeak of his molars.
And instead of being honest, like I needed him to be, he shifted focus to my actions. “It was before you had one of the girls who jumped Quinn at your side all night!”
I masked my response. Because if I gave away even a hint of how I felt, I wouldn’t be able to stomach what I had to do.
“Vivian is one of the Maidens, Landon. It’s my job to give them all attention throughout The Quest. Failing to do my job to satisfaction is part of what got us into this mess, and I won’t be taking that chance again.”
He growled, “I want to wring her neck for touching Quinn.”
“I don’t like what she did, either.” I waved my hand and stifled the words I wanted to say. “But again, it worked out in our—in Quinn’s favor. Didn’t it?”
Landon paced the room, pulling at his hair and working through what he wanted to tell me in his head. I set down my pen and picked up the glass beside it, taking a sip as I waited.
Amber liquid trembled in the crystal tumbler.
His expression warred between furious and pleading. “, you saw her tonight. With him . If she gets paired with Max Dread, he’ll do everything he can to get rid of her.”
“Really?” I set the glass down, running my finger along the rim. “That’s not the impression I get.”
Landon’s head snapped up. “What do you mean?”
“Max doesn’t want to get rid of Quinn, Landon.”
That did nothing to ease his anxieties, of course, and his voice rose, in pitch and intensity.
“What the fuck does he want with her, then?”
I arched a brow. “You mean…besides the obvious?”
While I knew it wasn’t nice to bait him, he was hiding things from me, and I could only mask so much. I also wasn’t in the most forgiving mood after seeing the marks on Quinn.
Including the bruises on her neck.
Landon clenched his jaw. “Yes, besides that.”
“He wants to turn her against us.”
Of the possible explanations I could offer for my current working theory, that was the kindest of the three.
“And you’re just going to give him everything he needs to do that?” He paced the room, spiraling so forcefully he could’ve drilled down to the earth’s crust. “Jesus, , please tell me that wasn’t your plan all along. Please tell me you didn’t make me?—”
“Make you what, exactly?” I snapped, my tenuous hold on my self-control threatening to break. “Because I believe my orders were perfectly clear. Unless there’s something you need to share with me?”
He scrubbed his hands over his face. “No. But Max?—”
“Isn’t part of this, for now. But moves were made that I couldn’t have anticipated, Landon, so I had to adjust my strategy. His interest in her works in our favor. His motivations aren’t something I have time or energy to address. They’re irrelevant so long as his intent remains the same. Keeping her here. Helping her win.”
Rising from my chair, I met him in the center of the room.
He’d stopped pacing, at least. But his eyes jumped between mine, searching tirelessly for answers I still couldn’t give him.
His amnesia remained a blessing and a curse.
Landon knew he trusted me, but he didn’t remember why. He knew we’d protect each other, but he didn’t remember we already had. And he knew we were best friends, but he didn’t remember before .
If I told him everything, I believed he would forgive me.
But I didn’t know if he’d forgive himself.
And I had no doubt my father would keep his promise. Teaching Landon a lesson the only way the Camelot Society knew how. Reminding him of the price for stepping out of line.
Neither of us would survive those consequences.
So, I stayed silent.
Praying something deep inside him held onto the truth.
“Landon, I’m asking for your trust. I’m asking you to believe me when I say that I did the only thing I could do to avoid losing her for good.”
His face crumpled. “You saw her tonight. She’s?—”
“Still exactly what Camelot Court needs.”
I grabbed his shoulders. Tension rippled down his biceps as he tried to contain his emotions, and the wrinkles in his rumpled appearance drew taut.
“Landon, that fact remains. And I believe it now more than ever after the way she walked into that room.”
“Yeah,” he spat, dropping his eyes. “Two steps ahead of you.”
“Exactly.”
He lifted his head, and I hoped I’d gotten through to him. I wanted him to understand. I wanted his trust.
But at the end of the day, I’d prepared myself a long time ago to move forward without it.
“If you can’t trust me, trust her.”
“I do trust her. It’s everyone else. It’s him I don’t trust.”
“If trust is conditional without cause, Landon, it isn’t really trust. She hasn’t done anything to give reason for doubt. She’s as steadfast in her pursuit as ever. More so now. And she deserves your faith in her. Without fear or limits. If you…” I couldn’t bring myself to say it before him, so I let out a breath. “In the end, she’ll see the truth. She’ll know the faith she placed in you wasn’t wasted.”
“And you?”
Me? While I appreciated the question, I’d accepted that what I wanted didn’t matter a long time ago. In regard to a lot of things, including Quinn, it was a dream slipping more out of reach with every move I had to make.
“In the end, with or without her faith in me restored, she’ll be Queen. That’s what matters. It’s all that matters. And I’m fully prepared to be taken off the board if that move means we win the game.”
Landon gripped my arms, his eyes darting to my chest where the brand still burned over my heart. Fear bled into his voice, drawn from something buried deep inside him. “Please, don’t let it come to that.”
Even without all his memories, Landon had only needed to see me rub the wound to remember the damage one man could do. To know we’d been locked in a deadlier game than he’d originally thought. Only that convinced him to heed my order and go with the backup plan.
It reassured me for the time being, at least about having him on my side, but there’d been a time when Landon wouldn’t have needed any proof to take direction from me. When he would’ve followed me, even if we took a circuitous path, trusting that I’d lead him where we needed to go.
I didn’t want to believe I’d lost him, but I couldn’t anticipate where his feelings might lead him.
And if I couldn’t predict the moves of even one piece on the board anymore, then whether I could avoid taking myself out of the game remained to be seen.
I hoped it wouldn’t come to that, but I couldn’t reassure him or myself of it. Not without divulging more.
Not without breaking him.
And…sacrificing him instead.
While it remained a move I’d make if absolutely necessary, I couldn’t do it unless all my other options ran out.
I wouldn’t.
So, I gave him the only truth I had. “I’m trying, mate. I really am.”