Chapter 3 #3
Irena set her head to the side. “Is the opera really so bad?”
“Of course it isn’t. It’s been my life, it has been…it’s been the making of me. But I want something more from this life. Certainly the aesthetics of the music are well worth attaining. And if this were all there was to it…”
“But this is all there is to it, isn’t it, dear?”
“Pray, do not pretend you don’t know of what I speak.”
“Oh?”
“There’s the jealousy that goes along with the trade, for one. There’s also the backbiting, the hypocrisy, the gossiping.”
“Oh, I suppose you have a minor point there.”
“Alas, it is a major point, Irena. And it’s one I can do without in my life. What I desire is a family and a man who is not only worthy of me, but who loves me. William is such a man. You will see. William is kind. He is gentle.”
“He is ruled by his mother.”
“Perhaps. Is that so bad?” Suzette shrugged.
Irena frowned. “It could be…if the woman decides she does not care for you.”
“She likes me.”
“She likes you now. But what is she going to do if you take one false step?”
“Come now. You know this is almost impossible. Think of the many operettas I have performed in. Have I ever missed a cue? Have I ever sung an off-key note? Flubbed the music?”
“But don’t you see? This is all part of the problem, child.
You are from the stage, from the opera. His mother will never forget it, and she will be looking for a chance to take you to task…
any misstep. And you know as well as I do that when someone is antagonistic toward you, you are more inclined to make mistakes. ”
“It’s going to be all right. I love William. He loves me. Even if his mother raises questions about me, he will defend me.” Suzette raised her chin. “I know he will.”
She looked around. They were talking in the entryway of Buffalo Bill’s tent. Across a narrow pathway from this main tent stood the Indian encampment. Suzette knew it was there, but she stood with her back to it, as though by ignoring it, it would go away.
“Irena, could we please be on our way? I feel we do not belong here. Besides, William is waiting for us.”
“He will keep for a little while. The show is entertaining enough to hold his attention.”
“Yes, but why should he have to ‘keep’? Come. I know this show may seem exciting to you, but—”
“It is exciting, Suzie. And indeed, when one reaches my age, it is well to find some aspect of life which is…enjoyable.”
Suzette breathed in passionately. “You are not so old. And even if you were, which you are not, you don’t look your age. Now, please. I miss William. Please accompany me as I walk back to my seat.”
“I cannot.”
Suzette raised her eyebrows. “Oh? Why can you not?”
“Because I promised Buffalo Bill I would sing at his reception tonight. Did you know the Queen will be attending?”
Suzette closed her eyes, but only for a fraction of a second. “You promised Buffalo Bill? Oh, Irena, no…”
Irena placed an arm around her granddaughter’s shoulders. “What has happened to you, Suzie?”
“What do you mean?”
“What I mean is…” Irena frowned. “Was your upbringing really so bad? I’ve always thought you had the best of all worlds.
You had me with you always. You had your parents, also, when they weren’t busy with an opera.
Now, certainly I’ll admit there is jealousy in the trade, as you say.
But what field of endeavor excludes jealousy? ”
“There are many I can think of.”
“After all,” Irena continued, as though Suzette hadn’t spoken, “your mother never entertained other men, your father never kept other women. They loved each other. They still do, and they love you.”
“Yes, but…”
“And you and I, we used to have such fun.”
Suzette set her lips together. “I have grown up. That’s what has happened. And, forgive me for this next observation, but I think it’s time you grew up too.”
“Ouch!”
“Tell Buffalo Bill you made a mistake.”
“I will not.”
“Shall I tell him for you, then?”
“No, child.” Irena’s voice was firm. “I’m still your grandmother, Suzie dear.
I know you are proud of the fact you are marrying for love instead of using William to further your career.
And I am happy to see you are proud and are attaining entrance into the world of your choosing. But do not interfere in my life.”
Suzette grimaced. “I suppose what you say is fair. But then, by the same token, you should not interfere in mine, and especially not in public, singing a funeral march.”
“I am your grandmother. All good grandmothers interfere in their granddaughter’s lives.”
Despite herself, Suzette smiled then quickly hid it. “You know it’s not true.”
Irena cocked her head.
“Oh, I give up,” said Suzette. “Very well. Have it your way. Sing for Buffalo Bill. But I will return here after the show. I will sit and watch as you charm the Queen as easily as you captivate a crowd. But afterwards, promise me we will go.”
Irena nodded. “Yes. I promise. Then we can go.”
Suzette swung her head back and forth, admitting defeat. “Good. I guess this is all I have to say. If you’ll excuse me, I am going back to William.”
“Very well, child.”