Chapter 15
Chapter
Fifteen
It was with a heavy heart when his path, at last, brought him back to her. As he silently crept up on her, he found her to be still hidden beneath his blanket, there, under their tree.
Coming up next to her, he startled her when he spoke. “Do not worry. It was only the footprint of a doe and a broken stick I found which caused the sound of a stick cracking. We are safe here, I think, but—”
She sighed. “Will I ever become used to you sneaking up on me?”
“Next time I will make more noise so I will not surprise you.”
“I would be grateful.” With a teasing smile aimed directly at him, she opened up the blanket surrounding her, whereupon he saw she was not fully dressed. Indeed, she was sitting before him in a see-through white slip.
While he groaned, she said, “Come, you look cold, and I am warm beneath your blanket. Here, share the warmth with me.” Her smile was so alluring, he almost lost all his good intentions, right then, right there.
He swallowed. He stared at her.
When she continued to speak, saying, “I would love to return the favor you have done me. Indeed, I would seek to indulge you with those very secret seductions you have shown to me this evening…” Only the survival of his people and their destiny held him back from her. And even then…
“Come,” she urged again, and she patted the ground next to her. “Let us have more fun.”
He swallowed several times before he was able to find his voice. “What you suggest would be most pleasant, very much. But, we have managed to avoid detection thus far, and I fear if we stay here longer, we might risk others finding us.”
“Oh? There is reason for you to believe we are in danger of discovery?”
He paused while he debated if he could resort to the white man’s way and tell her a lie.
He opened his mouth to do so, but discovered he couldn’t.
He was not a white man, and lying to his wife was not a deed of honor.
Alas, all he found he could say was, “No, we are not in imminent danger of discovery, but—”
“Then please, sit beside me here,” she said with a sweet smile.
He paused a moment while he collected his wits. Could he distract her? “Ah… Do you hear the music?”
“Music?” She set her head to the side.
“Hau. Is not the Song Bird singing tonight? Perhaps it is her voice I hear.”
“Your ear must be quite acute then, for I detect nothing more than the drums from your encampment.”
“And yet, I think your grandmother is singing tonight. We should go back there now.”
She frowned at him. “You would rather return to the party and listen to Irena than to join me and…”
He knelt next to her and picked up her hand, holding it within his own. “Listen to me, my wife, for I must speak to you solemnly.”
“Very well. I am listening,” she purred softly, and brought up her hand to run her fingers down his cheek.
He inhaled sharply. “For reasons I cannot tell you, we must not repeat what we have done this night, not until I have finished the quest I am bound to do.”
Her brow furrowed, but she didn’t say a word.
“Perhaps it has been a fault of mine to not open my heart to you until now. From the start, it has been my intention to cause you to change your mind and take me for a real husband. That this requires intimacy is a circumstance I have desired. But this has been unwise, I fear, and I can no longer give you the familiarity a wife deserves…until…”
Her frown deepened. “Until…”
“You recall my informing you about my people’s misfortune?”
“Yes.”
“I have come to realize I must complete my mission. Only after I free my people will I be at liberty to make love to you again.”
“Oh?” She sat unmoving for a time, then said, “Indeed? And when will your mission be complete?”
“Very soon, I hope. But in truth, it could last my lifetime.”
“Your lifetime?”
“Hau. I fear it could be so. Do not fret overly much, however, for I believe I am close to solving the mystery which keeps my people enslaved.”
“Oh.”
“Will you wait for me?”
“I have little choice. As you might remember, I have my own problems, and keeping you as my husband is a good solution to them.”
He nodded. “So it is. Then perhaps I have much luck this night, for it is not my desire to lose you as my wife.”
She withdrew her hand from his and carefully sat up. “Then this one time tonight is all we are to have?” Her frown deepened. “What was it all about, then, when you told me that if I should change my mind, you would be more than willing? Do you remember saying this to me when we were first married?”
“Hau. It is true. But I have been reminded by my spirit protector of my duty to my people.”
“Your spirit protector?”
“Yes.”
“Your mission…your people…?”
An uneasy silence stretched out between them.
She turned her face away from him, and he was at once presented with her beautiful profile.
He sighed, and she went on to say, “I do believe this is similar to what happened between myself and William. One night of love, and then… Are you spurning me as well?”
She came up onto her knees, sitting back against her calf muscles.
His blanket was around her shoulders and her cloak, upon which she reclined, looked to be as soft as the feathered down of a goose.
It was spilled out over the ground around her, making her appear as if she sat in the middle of a cloud.
He had never seen anything or anyone more exquisite.
“Spurned?” he asked. “I am uncertain I know this word.”
“It means to slight an…invitation…”
“Slight? I do not understand. Does not slight mean very little of something?”
“Yes, sometimes it does, but not in this case.” She tightened her lips, and her voice took on an edge. “What would you have me do, spell it out for you? I think, Mr. Lion, that you know well what it means. Your English is very good, I must say.”
He frowned. “I try to be very good. But I do not understand. Why are you becoming angry with me over a word?”
“I am not becoming angry with you. I am…all right…I’ll define it for you. Slight…it means to snub, to…rebuff, to insult one.”
“Insult? What have I said that is insulting?”
She sighed. “I no longer wish to have this conversation with you. I think you are right. You should take me back.”
“Take you back? Hiya, no, not like this. If it helps, I should tell you about what happened when I was gone from you tonight. Indeed, what is happening to me now is not because of you. Perhaps I should have made myself plainer from the start. My spirit protector reminded me that I cannot take any woman to my bed, no matter who she is, until my duty to my people is complete.”
Suzette had already come up onto her feet. He followed her up, but she looked anywhere but at him. Instead she was slipping into her clothes as fast as she could. If she had heard his explanation, he would not know it, for all she said was, “Thank you for the walk, Mr. Lion, but I—”
He reached out for her hand, touched her, but she jerked away from him. She stepped back, putting some distance between them.
As though to fill the gap, he said, “I do what I do because I must. I do not slight you, and believe me, if I could make love to you without possible harm coming to my people, I would do so.”
“So now I am the cause of you possibly harming your people?”
“Hiya, no, it is only—”
“You expect me to believe this?”
“About my people?”
“No, your excuses.” She shoved her arms into her dress. “Perhaps the problem is not your people, but rather your will. Maybe gaining what you needed from me has caused you to think you can insult my intelligence with your excuses.”
“Do you think I lie?”
“Yes, I do.”
He drew back, stunned. “Though I realize the white man can have a forked tongue when the occasion suits him, you should know there is no greater insult than to call an Indian a liar. In the minds of my people, there is no dog so low. I will tell you the truth one last time, and I dare you to believe me. I wish very much to have more relations with you...more times like we had tonight. But, for a time, because of my mission to free my people, I must not. Do you understand?”
In response, she sent her chin into the air.
“Forgive me, but I still cling to the notion you are lying, and I think you try to play me for a fool. What is it? What is the real reason? Is it despite the laws on the reservations, you already have another wife, as you once told me so long ago? That you dare not tell me about it, for fear of…? Or another girlfriend, perhaps, who will be upset to learn you have had this pleasant interlude with me?”
“If what you say were so, I would tell you about it.”
“You? You would? When most men would not?”
“I would not have taken you for a wife had I another. What I say to you is the truth.”
“Is it? Very well then. I will consider it. When I go home tonight, I will think much over what you have said, and I will decide then if I trust what you say or not. But at this moment, it stretches credulity.” Bending down, she picked up her cloak and swung it over her shoulders. “And now I must leave.”
She turned and started to go, whereupon he reached out to detain her. “I will see you back.”
“No, I will see myself back to the party, Mr. Lion, thank you very much.” She turned away from him and paced several more steps forward.
He followed her, and as he did so, his frown deepened. He placed a hand on her shoulder. “Do not leave yet, let us talk about this more…and tonight.”
“No, I need to think clearly, without the influence of you being beside me.” With this said, she shook off his hold, picked up the front of her dress and ran from their sheltered glen as though pursued by the white man’s devil.
He watched the place where she had been for a long, long time, and eventually he followed her, if only to ensure she returned to the party safely. He understood her upset. He could only hope that upon further thought, she would come to believe him.