2. Nyle Brown
“Brown! Don’t go anywhere. We need to talk,” Coach Barnes yelled as I packed up my things.
I inwardly groaned, feeling the pit of my stomach do somersaults at his request. All I wanted to do was go home, shower, and lay down. We’d been out in the heat practicing for two hours. It was exhausting, so I tried to think of something to get him to change his mind.
“I can’t, Coach. My mom is waiting for me, and she said I better not take too long.”
“She knows I need to talk to you, so don’t worry about it. I told her to run to the store and grab you a sports drink.”
My mouth went dry, making it hard for me to swallow the lump in my throat.
I bobbed my head and continued packing up my bag.
A part of me wanted to leave without saying anything.
I would rather walk home than stay behind with Coach, but if I didn’t, I feared I wouldn’t get any playing time.
I feared it would make things worse for me all around, so when all my teammates were gone, I dragged myself and my bag over to him.
My skin crawled when Coach’s hand went to my sweaty, lower back.
His beady eyes scanned over my body as he slowly trailed his tongue over his lips.
When his hands went lower to my butt, I wanted to scream.
I wanted to throw up all over him, but I was too afraid to do anything other than stand there.
“Uh . . . What did you need to talk to me about, Coach?” I stammered, hoping he would get on with it.
God, please let my mama hurry up.
I slightly jolted forward at the firm squeeze he gave my behind. Coach placed his other hand on my shoulder and stared into my eyes. When I glanced away, he demanded I be a man and give him eye contact.
With a tight jaw, my gaze met his. He gave me a lopsided grin and slowly reached around to touch my penis. Before practice, I put on a cup. I wasn’t a catcher, but I had a feeling Coach would try something like that. He had done it on more than one occasion, and I didn’t want it to happen again.
Coach’s eyes expanded, and his wide nostrils flared. Before I had time to process what was happening, he backhanded me so hard that spit flew from my mouth. I held my cheek and silently whimpered.
“Take that shit off right now, Nyle.”
“I . . . I can’t.”
He barged over to me, sat on the bench, and started unbuckling my belt. It was then that I blacked out. I’d learned to allow my mind to go elsewhere, taking me to a place where I was safe, loved, and cared for. A place where I wasn’t taken advantage of.
A place where my mama actually protected me.
The sound of Coach’s low grunts brought me back to reality. I knew exactly what that sound meant. When his hand released my bare balls, I wasted no time stepping away from him and pulling my pants up. I swiped the cup from the ground, grabbed my bag, and started out the dugout.
“Brown?” Coach called out to me, and I stopped in my tracks but didn’t turn around. “Let your mama know I’ll have the money in her account, and you’ll be starting next game.”
I didn’t acknowledge him, but I’d heard him loud and clear.
Off in the distance, I saw Mama’s car parked by Coach’s.
The sight of her sickened me. She sat on the hood of her car with a cigarette hanging from her mouth and my drink in her other.
I didn’t want anything from her, not even a ride, so I started my walk home.
“Nyle! Nyle, where do you think you’re going?” Mama asked, but I kept walking and ignored her.
The sound of her feet shuffling against the concrete behind me made me start running. Unfortunately, she caught up to me and jacked me up by my shirt.
“Let me go, Mama!”
“Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to like that? If you don’t get your ass in the car, I know something.” A few seconds passed before she inquired, “What did Coach say?”
“You know exactly what he said.”
“Money?” I nodded my answer, and the grin that spread her thin lips enraged me. “Good. I’ll make sure I get you something good with it too. Are you starting next game?”
“Yeah.”
“You must know, Nyle, I only want what’s best for you. To get to the top, you gotta make sacrifices.”
My blaring alarm woke me from my dream. Sweat covered my entire body, drenching my covers.
I threw them off me and snatched my phone off my nightstand to turn my alarm off.
For a moment, I lay there trying to regulate my emotions.
Anytime I dreamed of my past or my mother, I had to take the time to get myself together.
The older I got, the better I was at not allowing either to dictate my day.
After my talk with God, I was in a better headspace to get up and start my day.
My feet hit the ground, and I removed my sheets from the bed before taking them to the laundry room. I got the washer started, then headed back to my room.
Once my morning hygiene was handled, and I was dressed for the day, I went to fix myself some coffee and a light breakfast. I checked the time to see that my sister, Brielle, would be calling soon. Lord knows I needed to hear her voice.
On cue, at 7:30 on the dot, my phone rang. I slid my finger across the screen and placed it on speakerphone.
“Good morning, Sis.”
“Hey, Nyle. What’s wrong? I can hear something all in your tone,” Brielle replied, and I could hear the concern in her voice.
“Another dream,” was all I had to say. Brielle didn’t need any context. Besides my therapist, my family were the only people I felt comfortable with talking about my past. If it wasn’t for Brielle, the abuse probably would’ve gone on longer than it did.
“Was it her or the abuse?”
“Both. Coach Barnes.”
“Fat fucker,” Brielle muttered. “Are you okay?”
I chuckled at her. “Yeah, I am. I prayed so I’m good. I just hate when I dream about it, but my therapist told me they would occasionally come even in adulthood. It’s been a while since I had one.”
The abuse started when I was seven and lasted until I was eleven.
Renee Brown, the woman who brought me into the world, the woman who was supposed to love and protect me, allowed it to happen.
Hell, she orchestrated it most times. There was a total of three men she allowed to sexually abuse me for her own personal gain.
They would pay her and make sure I was the star of the team.
She tried telling me it was to make me great, but that shit didn’t do anything but tear me down and have me second-guessing a lot of things in life.
Brielle expelled a sigh. “Do you need me to come over?”
“Nah, I’m good. I promise. I need to be at the facility early anyway, so I’m about to head out after I eat.”
“Well, I can come up there, too, if needed. I can bring your niece so she can get some work in. You know she made the All-Star team.”
“That’s my girl.” I beamed. “It’s in her blood. She gets it from her uncle.”
“Whatever. Don’t act like I wasn’t that girl in softball.”
“Birthing pure athletes is the only good thing Renee has ever done in her life.”
Brielle giggled. “If that isn’t the truth. Well, I’ll let you know if we come by. Don’t forget we gotta meet at Nannie’s at six for dinner.”
“You need to be reminding Naheem. You know his ass is forgetful and will swear we didn’t tell him about it.”
“And you know what, you’re right. Let me call him now. I love you, Nyle.”
“I love you too, Bri.”
We ended the call, and I finished my breakfast while checking a few emails and text messages. My first training session started in an hour, so I cleaned up and headed to my facility.
Baseball had my heart. It was the sport of failure, and as many times as I failed, I found success in each one.
Each time was worth it. Not only did it help me grow as a player, but also as a person.
The grit and grind taught me a lot, and I wanted to teach it to other boys who loved the sport, especially the ones who looked like me.
After playing in college on a full scholarship and getting my degree in sports management, I decided to open a baseball facility, but I couldn’t do it in my hometown.
I had to get away. For six years, I tried staying back home.
Our lives were established there, but it also held too much trauma for me.
The fresh start was needed, so I packed up everything and moved to Maven Falls. What I didn’t expect was for my siblings and grandmother to follow me. It was obvious I wasn’t the only person who needed the change.
The things we’d been through were traumatic, especially for me and Nannie.
I made sure I had all I needed and headed to my garage to my truck.
My facility, Batters Up, was a fifteen-minute drive from my house.
We were open Monday through Saturday from eight to eight.
The love and success I’d seen through the venture was nothing short of amazing.
Before we opened, Maven Falls didn’t have anything like that.
Camden Cove was the closest city to us that housed baseball facilities, but it was an hour drive.
I secured the perfect spot in the city, and we were constantly busy.
When I pulled up, I saw the openers were already there.
The sound of the machines warming up greeted me.
The facility was about fifteen thousand square feet with cages, pitching machines, turf mounds, and much more.
There was an equipment store at the front where members checked in.
They could either rent or buy whatever they needed.
I’d envisioned the space many times before, and each time I walked in, I was in awe of how far we’d come.
“What’s good, Nyle?” Weston greeted me with his arms outstretched and a bright smile. We embraced in a brotherly hug and headed back to my office.
“Not much. How’s it going this morning?”
“Good. Everyone has gotten their tasks done. We’re just waiting to open.”
“That’s what I like to hear.”