Chapter 6 #3
I shrug. ‘I spent a lot of time on my own when I was growing up, so I played a lot of computer games and got quite obsessed, so I’m really good at most of them, as you know.
’ I smile at him and he gives me an accepting nod back.
‘I figured there were going to be more people like me – and you – online and I thought I’d try and connect with them. Just for the fun of it, at first.’
‘And you turned it into a worldwide phenomenon,’ he says with a twinkle in his eye.
‘I wouldn’t go that far. Not yet anyway,’ I say, though my chest swells with pride that he’d describe my show like that. It feels good, being complimented by someone with so much about him he became a self-made billionaire.
‘I didn’t start out wanting to be internet famous,’ I say.
‘I just wanted a bit of attention. I think it all stems from my parents being the working-all-hours type, who didn’t turn up to any of the school functions, like my friends’ parents did.
I was looked after pretty much all the time by various nannies and au pairs, so I was a lonely child at home. ’
‘Sorry to hear that,’ Raffa says quietly.
I shrug. ‘I’m pretty sure that – though they’ve never directly said this to me – they never intended to have children and they certainly never wanted to have any more after me.
Don’t get me wrong, I had a lot of friends and I guess I saw strangers on the internet as an extension of that.
It honestly never occurred to me when I first started my show on HelSkel that it would get as big as it has.
But it seems there’s a real hunger for upbeat entertainment like mine in these challenging times and being an early adopter of the app, practically on the day it launched, there wasn’t a lot of competition on it for people’s eyeballs at first. My show seemed to strike a chord with people and slowly but surely turned into a hit.
I guess I’m not the only person who was lonely and looking for connection with others. ’
Raffa smiles at me, his eyes full of warmth. ‘Okay, I admit it. I am kind of jealous that you get to do such a cool job,’ he says. ‘I’d love to spend my days gaming and getting paid for it. And I’m hugely impressed by what you’ve achieved with your show. It’s awesome. Really.’
I put my croissant back down on my plate, suddenly not hungry any more. My stomach feels like it’s full of butterflies.
He clears his throat and gets up and I watch as he walks over to the sofa and sits down heavily on it.
Abandoning my breakfast, I follow him and sit at the other end, making sure there’s a ‘friendly’ amount of space between us.
I wish he’d let me get closer to him.
Because, despite his compliments, he’s definitely still holding me at arm’s length at the moment.
I push down my frustration.
It’s unfair of me to feel like this. He’s never promised me a thing, in terms of our relationship with each other.
There’s a silence where we both stare at the gently undulating sea beyond the floor-to-ceiling windows.
‘Hey. Will you come seabobbing with me?’ I ask, my voice sounding overly loud in the room now.
He double-blinks at me. ‘Seawhating?’
‘Seabobbing. I saw it in the activities brochure. It looks like a blast.’
‘Err… Well, I’ve got a lot to get through today. I’m not sure how much time I’ll have to do an activity.’ He looks over to where his laptop is sitting on the kitchen counter.
It’s like that thing is his partner that he’s obsessed with and can’t stop thinking about.
‘Oh, come on!’ I say, exasperation getting in the way of my cool.
‘I mean, you can take an hour or two out after lunch, right? You’re not seriously going to work all day, every day while we’re here?
The Maldives probably won’t be here forever and you’ll kick yourself later if you miss the opportunity to have some fun here. ’
He stares at me and I swear I can see cogs moving behind his eyes.
‘Please?’ I say, in my most persuasive tone.
‘I might never get the chance to do it again. I’ve always wanted to try it.
And the reefs are in danger of disappearing because of the rising sea temperature.
The brochure says there’s a brilliant project going on right by here to help save and regrow the coral. We have to go and see it.’
I open my hands in an expansive gesture as inspiration strikes. ‘Think of it like a side-quest, where you can increase your inventory of knowledge and skills. You never know when it might come in useful.’
He refolds his arms, but I can tell from the way a smile is pushing at his lips that I’ve persuaded him. ‘If it really is only an hour. And it’ll have to be this afternoon, so you’ll need to entertain yourself for a bit while I work.’
I hold out my hand for him to shake. ‘Deal. I wanted to do some sunbathing and maybe swim in our pool for a bit today anyway.’
He puts his hand in mine and my whole body gives a little shiver of joy as the warm skin of his palm presses firmly into mine.
How can I find a handshake sexy, for goodness’ sake?
I really need to pull myself together or things here are going to spin completely out of my control.