Chapter 11 #3
I shrug. ‘I suppose so. I’ve not really thought that hard about it. I’m mostly just getting on with building my new business at the moment.’
‘So, you’ve put yourself in the middle of a protective bubble.’
‘A bubble?’
‘Yeah. Here’s another question for you. When did you last have a challenging experience?’
‘Does coming here with you count?’
She bats a playful hand at me. ‘Funny.’
‘I thought so.’
Her expression turns serious and she looks me right in the eyes now, her gaze steady. ‘Okay. A different question then. How much more money and success do you need before it’s enough?’
I look away from her and gaze out to sea. ‘Honestly, I don’t know.’
‘Seriously? There’s no point at which you think you’ll be satisfied?’
Again, I shrug. ‘I guess I want to push it until it feels right. I’m not about to retire right now, anyway. I’d be so bored. I love what I do and I have no idea what I’d do if it wasn’t this.’
‘But all the time? Even during holidays and weddings?’
‘You do what needs to be done when it needs to be done with this kind of work. That’s what makes or breaks a company. Especially when you’re in a competitive field.’
‘Aren’t you worried you’ll make yourself ill? Or lose all your friends? Or miss meeting the person you’re meant to be with for the rest of your life?’
I swallow hard, feeling antsy now at this line of questioning.
It’s starting to feel a bit too close to the bone.
‘Nope. I’m not worried about that. I’m only in my late twenties.
I’ve got loads of time before I need to think about settling down.
If I ever do. I’m not sure if I’m cut out for marriage anyway. ’
‘But what if you miss noticing the person you’re meant to be with because you’re too busy looking down at that thing?’ she asks, gesturing at my laptop.
‘That’s not something I’m worried about.’
‘You really aren’t worried you’ll leave everyone behind – or that they’ll leave you – and you’ll be lonely?’
‘It’s not going to be forever, this pace of working.’
‘You sure about that? I see how much of a buzz you get out of it. You don’t think you’ll get obsessed with reaching the next big number?’
‘I can control it.’
‘Really? I mean, you don’t seem to have any idea about what enough is.’
I press my mouth into a smile. ‘Not right now, maybe. But it’s going to be fun finding out.’
She blows out a long breath. ‘Yeah. Maybe.’
‘You don’t agree?’
Instead of answering that, she says, ‘Okay. One more question for you. Who is it you’re competing with?’
‘Myself mostly. I’ve always wanted to push my limits.
Prove to myself I can be successful on my own merits.
Be the “Black Sheep” who proved everyone else wrong about them.
’ I let out a low snort, suddenly uncomfortable with the way that line of thinking is going.
I don’t want to talk about my family dynamics again right now.
‘Though, there is one guy who I’ve been chasing up the rich list that I’d love to beat,’ I say, to swerve the subject.
‘He’s a real arsehole; a misogynist and a total beast to the people who work for him.
I’d love to get a bigger number than him.
He’d hate to be overtaken by me. He’s never liked me. The tosser.’
Ida lets out a bark of laughter at that. ‘Wow. It really is all about those numbers.’
‘Yep. At its most basic level. I think it often is with guys. More currency, more notches on the bedpost, more inches, like you say.’ I wink at her.
‘You’re blowing my mind,’ Ida says with heavy irony in her voice.
‘It’s about respect earned, when it comes down to it. It doesn’t necessarily matter what the thing is, as long as you have more of it than the next guy.’
‘So, it’s all just a big, grown-up game?’ she says. ‘You’re competing to complete levels and win by getting the highest score – or the biggest number of pounds, in your case?’
‘As a gaming fan, I approve of that analogy.’
‘But when you’re as wealthy as you are doesn’t everything lose its meaning? You can have anything at all in the world that you want, so how can you value things if everything’s up for grabs?’
I frown at that. It’s a good point. ‘Not everything is,’ I counter, uncomfortable with the way this conversation has turned again. ‘People aren’t.’
‘Some people are.’
‘But you can’t buy love. You can buy adoration and respect, but not love. That has to be earned another way.’
She nods at that. ‘Truth.’
Picking up the drink on the table next to us, I toast her with it, then swallow a big gulp of it to try and relieve the tension in my throat, before putting it back.
‘It must be so weird being you,’ Ida says after a moment of silence.
‘Thanks,’ I say dryly.
‘I don’t mean you’re weird. Just that you have different boundaries to the rest of us.’
‘I’d like to think I still have the same boundaries as other people.’
‘How can you? When you know you can buy your way out of any trouble you get into.’
‘Only to a point. Even billionaires aren’t allowed to commit murder with impunity,’ I point out.
‘But you could pay someone else to take the fall for you.’ She grins at this.
‘This conversation got very dark all of a sudden.’
‘Yeah. Sorry about that. I get a bit carried away sometimes. It’s the creative in me. Always looking for the plot twist.’
I smile, remembering the crime thriller she was so engrossed in the other day.
‘But seriously, do you not feel a weight of responsibility to the world?’ she adds. ‘Having that much money?’
‘Yeah, some days I do. I mean, I intend to do a lot of good with it, once I’ve got the breathing space to think about it properly.’
‘You and your friends were pretty young to suddenly become that wealthy.’
‘True. We’re all dealing with it in different ways too. Kit’s splashing the cash about, living his best life, whereas Elliot’s carefully reinvesting it in his hotel chain.’
‘And you’ve started a new business – doing what exactly?’
‘We’re building a piece of software for the finance sector for use in global trading.’
I swear she’s trying not to roll her eyes at that.
‘Right,’ she says. ‘So, you’re just biding your time, waiting for the perfect opportunity to jump in with your billions and save the world.’
I raise my eyebrows. ‘Yeah, maybe I am.’
‘It’s a tricky thing to navigate, I imagine. All that power and opportunity.’
‘I guess. But I think I’ll be fine. I’ve got my head screwed on right and I’m determined to do great things.’
‘There’s nothing wrong with being ambitious, but you’ve got to get the balance of your life right, dude.
’ She leans towards me again, kissing me deeply for a minute, before pulling back a little to look into my eyes.
‘So stop working and come and play with me.’ Once again she starts the rocking motion of her hips on my still semi-hard cock.
Which of course makes it spring right back to life.
‘We seem to have circled back to the beginning,’ I say with an amused grin.
‘We do, yeah. Stop fighting it. It’s an inevitability.’
I know she’s right about that. There’s no way I’m going to be able to concentrate on working when there’s sex with Ida on the table.
Speaking of which, I put my hands back onto her hips, holding on to her tightly while I swing my legs over the side of the lounger. Then I stand up, lifting her with me so she has to wrap her legs around my waist.
She giggles with pleasure as I carry her back into the villa, heading straight for the dining area and an afternoon feast.