Chapter 14 #2
Kalpana waved from the top of the beach and walked down towards him.
She had tied her hair back and held her sandals in one hand.
The dress she was wearing was an extremely modest flowy affair, but the wind coming from the sea pressed it against her body, highlighting every curve, so that he hastily focused on her face.
She came to a halt a couple of feet away. ‘Hi,’ she said. ‘Mind if I join you?’
‘Uhm. Sure.’
They walked down the shoreline together.
Sampath sought for something to say that wasn’t ‘you look amazing’. He settled for the most obvious question. ‘So, er … where’s Marcus?’
She turned her face towards the lowering sun. ‘He was supposed to come with me,’ she said. ‘But then he decided he wanted to have a nap instead. So, I thought I’d come out by myself. Have some time to think.’
‘Oh. In that case, I should leave you to your solitude …’
‘No. Don’t. I …’ She turned to look at him, the sunset highlighting her cheek in gold. ‘I have a question you might be able to help with.’
He stopped walking. So did she.
She looked back out to sea. ‘You’ve organised lots of weddings, right? Is it … normal for someone to have doubts about getting married?’
His heart soared. Then his brain punched it back down again.
She was having doubts about marrying Marcus.
Good. Excellent. But he’d only just had a conversation with Ashley about how his job was to make sure the wedding happened without cold feet getting in the way.
If he messed up this wedding, he wouldn’t have a job.
To buy himself some time, he said, ‘Pardon?’
‘It’s silly. I just wondered if other brides felt … worried about whether they were doing the right thing.’ She shook her head. ‘Never mind. It’s just me being silly.’
No matter how he felt about their compatibility, Kalpana and Marcus were both his clients. He had to do his job. He swallowed down the urge to say, ‘No, no, no. You should leave him’ and said, ‘That’s not silly. It happens all the time.’
Hesitation before the event was … so normal. So common.
The relief in her expression was immediate. ‘Really? That’s reassuring to know.’ She gave a small laugh. ‘I thought I was going mad.’
‘No, you’re not.’ He gestured back towards the main beach. ‘Shall we?’
When they were walking again, with him closer to the sea than she was, he said, ‘Marriage is a big commitment. It’s only natural that you should stop from time to time and think about it.
’ This was a script he knew well. He let himself sink into the familiarity of it so that he could block out the screaming in his head.
‘These days, people don’t need to get married to stay together, but it’s an expression of your commitment to each other.
You’re getting married because you genuinely believe you will be happier with that person than you would be without them.
The wedding is just a public celebration of that. ’
‘How do I know that I’m going to be happy?’
‘I can’t answer that. No one can. But you’ll know, in your heart, if it’s likely.’
She was quiet for a bit. ‘How?’
‘Well, think about how you felt when he first asked you to marry him. He asked you, right? Not the other way around?’ He knew the answer – because they’d told him – but he wanted her to remember it.
No. He didn’t really want her to think about it, but …
he wouldn’t be doing his job if he didn’t ask.
‘Yes. He asked me. It was during a romantic dinner in a lovely restaurant. The ring was tied to a champagne glass …’ She looked down and smiled. ‘We got a round of applause from the other diners.’
Of course, they had. Marcus went for the grand gestures and what was the point of a grand gesture without an audience?
His wedding plans – the exotic locations, the photographable details – they were all about the grand gestures.
Not what Kalpana wanted. Or maybe not even what Marcus really wanted.
Just because he was a massive show-off didn’t mean he didn’t have issues he was working through.
‘He had asked my parents for permission already,’ Kalpana said. The pause that followed seemed significant.
‘Was that important to you?’ he asked her.
‘I … guess it was nice. They absolutely love him. As far as my parents are concerned, Marcus is the best thing that could have happened to me.’
‘So, when you met him and fell for him, he made you feel …?’
‘Special.’ There was no hesitation at all, which was a good sign. Or a bad sign, depending on which perspective he was taking. Professional wedding planner Sampath was pleased about it.
‘And now he makes you feel …’ he prompted.
She carried on walking. After a few moments, she sighed, a deep, sad sigh. ‘When he’s there. When he’s looking at me. I still feel special. But he’s so distracted. I … What if he’s going off the idea of getting married?’
He hated that he had to say this. ‘You know, you should probably be having this conversation with him. Planning a wedding is a big deal. Sometimes it feels so all-consuming that it overshadows the whole point of it … which is that you want to be together forever. Sometimes, it’s good to talk about it, take a few days off from focusing on the wedding and just reconnect. ’
She stopped walking and looked at her feet. He stopped too. The sea lapped in. Foamy water swirled around their feet and then drew back, leaving their toes buried in the sand. Kalpana’s toenails were painted sparkly pink. There was something joyful about them.
She wriggled them free of the sand. ‘Yes,’ she said.
‘Yes. You’re right. We’ve been so busy planning this trip and then doing reconnaissance to decide on what we really want for the wedding that we’ve lost sight of what’s important.
I bet Marcus is just feeling overwhelmed by it all.
’ She put a hand on his arm. ‘Thank you, Sampath. You really are very good at this.’
The warmth of her hand on his bare arm was a wonderful jolt.
When she removed her hand, he could still feel the ghost impression of it on his skin.
Resisting the temptation to rub his arm where she’d touched him, he looked across to the sea.
The sun was almost below the horizon now.
He knew from experience that there was no long-drawn twilight.
‘It’ll be dark soon.’ He pointed, with his flip-flops, towards the hotel. ‘You should get back.’
‘Oh, you’re right.’ She turned to leave and looked back over her shoulder. ‘Thanks for listening to me.’
He spread his hands wide and made himself smile. ‘All part of the service.’
‘You’re a good friend.’
He watched her walk away and felt his heart shred itself in his chest.