Chapter Six – Mira
Chapter Six
Mira
‘You didn’t need to dress up for me,’ Cassius remarked as I walked further into the cell. ‘But I’m glad you did.’
‘I’m glad you like the outfit,’ I replied, ‘since I bought it with you in mind.’
As I’d expected, Cassius seemed pleased by my honesty. Subterfuge appealed to him – but he respected boldness more.
He leant back in one of the plush chairs and I took the seat next to him. All that separated us was a small table; I set down the bottle and two glasses, pouring a decent amount of wine into both.
‘So,’ I said, crossing my legs, ‘how about that drink?’
Suspicion and intrigue battled for dominance in his midnight-blue eyes. He didn’t trust me much more than I trusted him. But that was what made this so entertaining.
He reached for the glass closest to my end of the table. I raised an eyebrow. ‘Worried I’m trying to poison you?’
‘Are you?’ He swirled the red liquid in his glass.
‘No,’ I replied, matching his nonchalance. ‘If I was going to kill you, I think I would do it with a blade. If memory serves, I’ve already had that chance.’
‘How could I forget?’ Cassius’s tone was light, but he still hadn’t taken a sip.
‘You’re not really afraid of me, are you?’ There it was again: that disconcerting, misplaced sympathy. ‘I know Odessa told you that the Kalurians wanted you executed, but I never considered killing you.’ Not seriously, anyway.
‘You locked me up for months.’ It was impossible to tell what Cassius was thinking; there was no inflection in his voice.
‘I was angry. You betrayed me – in so many ways.’
‘So this was your idea of punishment?’ Cassius looked almost curious. As if he genuinely wanted to know the answer.
‘I didn’t know what to do with you.’ I threw my hands in the air. ‘You’re an enemy prince in an enemy nation. What would you have done in my position?’
‘A set of proper chambers might have been a bit more palatable.’
‘Except I know you. How long would it have been until you found a way to correspond with Roran or Scarlett? I couldn’t risk that.’
‘I’ve told you that I don’t trust my siblings. Especially Roran.’
‘And I’ve told you that I don’t trust you. You’ve lied too many times.’
Cassius stood abruptly. His sudden movement caught me by surprise, as did the emotion simmering beneath the surface.
‘I couldn’t tell you the truth about Odessa.
You never would have helped me implicate the general if you’d known her parents would be executed – and we never could have gotten my father out of the way without removing General Tiran. ’
‘It was more than that, though, wasn’t it?’ I said, sipping the wine. I couldn’t taste my blood, but my stomach churned with the knowledge that it was there. ‘You said it yourself – what use was Odessa in comparison to me?’
‘That comment really bothered you, didn’t it?’ Cassius’s smile – more of a smirk – greeted me as he sank back into his seat.
I ignored his remark. ‘There was another reason I left you down here. Even if I could have trusted your motives, I didn’t trust the Kalurians not to hurt you. They tolerate the other Ravalians, but as Roran’s brother . . . this was the best solution I could think of.’
Cassius sipped the wine, but his eyes remained on my face. ‘So you had my best interests at heart.’
‘Your safety was something I considered,’ I replied, keeping my tone level. He was trying to get a rise out of me, and I refused to give him the satisfaction. ‘One of many factors in my decision.’
‘And can that decision be reversed?’
I set down my goblet.
Cassius took another sip. I had the sense he was thinking very intently, but his voice was measured.
‘You haven’t visited me since my imprisonment.
Coming here, dressed like that–’ he waved a hand over my outfit– ‘bringing wine, being pleasant . . . you want something from me. Do you expect me to guess what that is? Or will you tell me?’
‘Don’t you want to spend more time reminiscing first? Looking back on all the good times?’
Where my voice had been sugary sweet, his was deadpan. ‘If that’s what you prefer.’
I sighed and stood, even though it meant acknowledging he’d called my bluff. I crossed the cell to stand in front of the tapestries, assuming it would be easier to look at them than it would be to face Cassius.
‘Forest scenes?’ They were strangely simple – and wholesome – for someone who had a reputation for throwing luxurious and debauched parties back in the Ravalian Court.
Cassius strolled over to my side. ‘I find them . . . soothing.’ An edge of amusement entered his voice. ‘Do you disagree?’
‘No. I just – I didn’t think you –’
‘You didn’t think that I might like to stare at something that resembles the outside world, when I’m stuck in a ten-metre cell, day in and day out?’ His words were barbed. Designed to cut.
‘I’m sorry,’ I said, and meant it. ‘I didn’t think.’
‘No. You didn’t.’ Silence stretched between us. ‘There’s another reason I like these. My father used to take me hunting in the forest. Usually Roran and Scarlett would come along, but there were times when it was just us. Those were some of the happiest memories of my childhood.’
I blinked – startled by his uncharacteristic vulnerability. I had noticed hunting scenes in his chambers back in Caleah Fortress, but I’d assumed they were there to intimidate. It hadn’t occurred to me that they held sentimental value.
‘I’m not the monster you think I am, Mira,’ Cassius said softly. ‘Or at least, I don’t want to be. I’m flawed – but I’m not evil. Not like Roran.’
I thought of how Roran had dangled Darius and Nari’s lives in front of me. Only the worst kind of monster delighted in causing pain. Cassius was a lot of things, but he wasn’t sadistic.
My eyes dropped to the scar encircling Cassius’s throat – the scar that Roran had inflicted, when he’d whipped his younger brother at Emperor Kalias’s request. For as long as I’d known Cassius, he had kept that scar concealed, wearing high-necked collars that had become something of a fashion statement.
It was strange to see it on display now, and I felt myself soften towards him.
‘What was it like? Growing up in the Ravalian Court?’
‘If it wasn’t for Scarlett, I probably wouldn’t have survived. Half-siblings or not, we looked out for each other. When I was young, I relied on her more than I . . .’ Cassius’s face suddenly hardened. ‘It doesn’t matter. She proved I was right not to trust her in the end.’
I had my own issues with Scarlett, so I was happy to let that one lie. But I sensed their relationship was more complicated than I could fathom.
‘I knew Emperor Kalias was cruel,’ I said, ‘but I didn’t think he would be cruel to his own children.’
‘I don’t think he saw us as children. We were heirs – a pragmatic necessity, nothing more. In his eyes, only the son who inherited his throne was worth anything at all.’
‘Roran, you mean.’
‘Roran,’ Cassius agreed. ‘Sometimes I wonder if he was just a boy once, like me, before our father trained him to become a monster. But I can’t remember him well enough to know for certain. Scarlett might, but I’ve never asked her.’
‘So you really have no intention of helping Roran? Even if he offered you a position in his Court?’
‘Anything Roran offered me would be short-lived. He would kill me the moment I was no longer useful.’
I recalled Roran’s laughter when I had tried to make a trade for Cassius, and I didn’t doubt it.
But it was Cassius’s matter-of-fact tone that really hit home.
I felt as though I was getting a real glimpse into his world – a world in which family were reluctant allies at best and mortal enemies at worst.
For someone who had grown up like that, always fearing for his life . . . was it any wonder that Cassius had lied and schemed and betrayed? What would I be like, if I’d grown up in the Ravalian Court?
‘What are you thinking about so intently?’
I told him.
Cassius laughed lightly. ‘I can’t imagine you being as ruthless as me or Roran, so put it out of your mind.’
‘How can you say that?’ I was genuinely shocked. ‘I crossed so many lines in the Ravalian Court, made so many decisions that I regret, and–’
‘And you made a different choice in the end. I didn’t understand it at the time, but I do now.’ Cassius smiled at my confusion. ‘Mira, you turned away from revenge. You let go of your hatred for Emperor Kalias and chose to sail to Kalure.’
‘It didn’t make a difference, though,’ I said sadly. ‘Aric and Lillian were still caught in the crossfire.’
‘I heard that boy yelling at you.’ Cassius tilted his head, the light of the single fire brazier flickering across his angular cheek.
‘He’s a fool – or maybe Scarlett has his emotions all twisted up and confused.
She’s good at that. Either way, you made the right choice.
You need to stop punishing yourself for it.
And maybe it wouldn’t hurt to tap into some of the anger you felt towards my father. Channel it into defeating Roran.’
I glanced at the bottle of red wine. Cassius followed the direction of my gaze.
‘Velanthe thinks I should use blood magic. That embracing it will allow me to defeat Roran.’
‘And what do you think?’ Cassius asked steadily.
‘That it feels like losing myself.’
‘Doesn’t sound like much of a solution, then.’
I frowned. ‘I was certain you would encourage me to use it. That you’d say the end justifies the means.’
‘Maybe I’m reassessing some of my old philosophies,’ Cassius replied. ‘One advantage to being imprisoned for two months – I’ve had endless time to think.’
‘I thought you’d be furious with me. That you’d hate me for leaving you down here.’
Another shrug. ‘I told you – I’ve had plenty of time to think. Plenty of time to cycle through rage, too. But even when I was furious with you . . . I never hated you, Mira. I don’t think I’m capable of hating you.’
He looked at me with such disturbing sincerity that I had to glance away, my heart beating erratically.
Cassius reached for the bottle of wine, but I stopped him.
‘Don’t,’ I said, placing my hand over his – and then quickly letting go, as if his touch had burned me.
Those striking dark blue eyes met mine. I had the sense that he saw more than I wanted him to, but he didn’t question me. Merely released the bottle and smiled that casual, disarming smile of his, as if things hadn’t changed between us. As if the world didn’t feel like it had tilted on its axis.
‘What do you want from me, Mira?’ he asked lightly. ‘Advice on ruling? Tips on how to beat Roran?’
‘Actually,’ I said, ‘the Kalurian clan leader is on his way here. Roran offered him a deal that I can’t afford for him to take, and V?lund requested a meeting with you. I was hoping–’
‘That you could convince me to behave.’ Cassius’s smile seemed frozen, and it no longer reached his eyes. I hadn’t realised how much I had been enjoying his openness until it was gone – like a door that had been slammed in my face.
‘You knew I wanted something when I came here,’ I said, hating that I was trying to justify my actions.
‘I did,’ Cassius said, more to himself than to me. ‘But I was starting to think . . .’
‘What?’
He didn’t answer. If possible, his expression became even more remote. And I wondered if he’d started to think I wanted his company. That I had been as lonely as he clearly was.
‘I might have come here for political reasons, but I’ve enjoyed talking to you. Far more than I thought I would.’ Inwardly, I winced. Not helping, Mira.
‘Since you want something from me,’ Cassius continued, ignoring my comment, ‘I assume you’re offering something in exchange?’
‘That’s usually how negotiations work, isn’t it?’ I said, echoing his earlier words. ‘Both parties have to give something.’
‘And in your case, that would be . . .?’
‘Chambers above ground. With guards stationed on your door.’
‘ One guard,’ Cassius said immediately. ‘And the option to leave my rooms – with an escort.’
‘Fine.’
‘You’re not going to haggle?’ A hint of amusement entered his voice.
‘I wouldn’t give you the pleasure.’
‘Then we have a deal.’ Cassius’s tone was all business. ‘Do you have a strategy in mind for the clan leader?’
I fidgeted in my seat, unwilling to explain that Velanthe’s preferred strategy was blood magic. Cassius’s sharp eyes noticed my hesitation.
‘Roran offered V?lund control over the Wilds,’ I said finally. ‘I would have to offer something just as enticing.’
‘Ah.’ Cassius didn’t outwardly react, but the way he looked at me made my pulse spike. ‘You’re angling for a marriage proposal.’
‘No,’ I said quickly. ‘That’s not–’
‘It’s the most efficient means to convince him to back you,’ Cassius interrupted.
‘I’m sure I can help nudge him in the right direction, if that’s what you want.
Though I might have to smooth over some of the finer details of our engagement.
Maybe this time you’ll actually go through with the wedding. ’
He stood and crossed over to the door. Despite the fact that he was the one locked in a cell, the dismissal was clear.
After the tentative warmth we’d shared, his coldness bothered me. It made me feel guilty – as though I’d done something wrong. Which was utterly infuriating , considering everything he’d put me through.
‘You have no right to be angry.’
‘What makes you think I’m angry?’ Cassius asked, in a voice as dead as his face. ‘I agreed to help you. Unless you intend to take me to my new chambers tonight, it would seem our business is done.’
I wanted to argue with him. No – I wanted to hit him, but I suppressed the unsettling urge.
‘Leave the bottle,’ he said, when I reached for the wine.
I hesitated. This was my chance. All he had to do was drink it – and I could return later to smooth all this over. To turn him into someone more malleable .
Which was precisely what I should want. To change him.
But even in the midst of my anger, a part of me rebelled against the idea. Before I could think better of it, I snatched up the bottle and two glasses. Let him think I was being petty – I couldn’t care less.
I unlocked the cell and re-locked it on the other side, deliberately avoiding Cassius’s gaze. I thought I saw his eyes linger on the wine bottle gripped in my hands, but he said nothing more.
And neither did I.