Chapter Twenty-One
Talking to Dashiell really is helpful. When he says no one will ever hurt me again, it gets me thinking.
I have the two most powerful wolves in this pack on my side.
Maybe I shouldn't worry about anything and follow my happiness.
If Axe wants me, what reason is there for me not to give him a chance?
Joel means nothing since the rejection. I'm free.
Maybe this is my good karma, alpha Axel.
I've been tormented for years to end up in a protective man's arms. This is definitely something I need to consider.
I doubt anyone would find out about us anyway since we don't leave the house much.
After Dashiell leaves, I go to my room and lock the door so Axe can't come in.
I need this time alone to think about everything.
I want to come to this decision with a logical mind.
If I stare into his intense eyes while making a decision, he will sway me.
Now that I've felt his lips against mine, I know my barriers would drop around him.
I know I said I would leave everything behind and marry a human one day.
But if I went down that road, my connection to my wolf would lessen.
She may become detached and uncontrollable.
Plus, how would I shift if I live a human life in the city in some apartment?
If I stay with Axe, my wolf will stay connected to other wolves.
But then again, my wolf still yearns for Joel, so I'm not sure how she would react to Axe's wolf if I got close to him.
I have to take her and myself into consideration.
***
I've stayed in my room all day and I've planned to for the night as well but my stomach is grumbling.
Even though I'm still undecided and don't want to run into Axe, I'm too hungry, so I head to the kitchen.
After cutting up some chicken, I go through the fridge, trying to find something to have with it.
It's always hard to pair a side with protein.
“Elora.” I jump at his voice and spin around. How didn't I know he walked in?
“Hi,” I murmur.
“Can we talk?” Axe asks, and I nod. “First of all, I want to say I'm sorry if I forced myself on you before.”
“No, you didn't. I mean it took me by surprise but I liked it,” I ramble.
My eyes go wide when I realise I just admitted to him that I liked it. He bites his lip as if to prevent a smile.
“You liked it?” He comes closer and stops in front of me.
“What did you want to talk about?” I ask to end this embarrassing conversation.
“I've been thinking, a lot. I keep going back and forth but I need to ask you this. Then I'll know for sure.”
The next question is going to be the most important one in my life. Even though I haven't heard it yet, it will be. Axe hesitates, averts his eyes, leaning back on his feet, running his hand through his hair. When he looks back at me, he straightens his posture and clears his throat.
“Do you want to give us a chance?” He gestures between us.
“I've been thinking about that all day,” I start, trying to give myself time to think.
“I know I'm older than you. I know you may have worries because of the stories about me that circulated around the pack for years.
I know I have a lot of flaws. I know you're young and may have plans for your life but if you want this, I'm willing to try to be happy again, and I think you're my best shot at it.” Axe's eyes are honest. I can see the vulnerability in them.
“I feel protected with you... but I'm just scared,” I admit.
“Elora.” Axe grabs my hands in his and steps closer to me. “I will never let someone hurt you again.”
“Yes,” the word leaves my mouth before I let myself overthink.
“What?” He lifts my chin up to look at him.
“I owe myself this.”
A beautiful smile stretches across his face, overwhelming me with delight that I was the one who put it there.
That's the first time I've seen him smile.
To see that smile on such a broken man and to be the reason for it makes giving us a chance worth it.
He leans down and softly presses his lips against mine.
His lips move slowly and sensually. This kiss is even better than the first. I wrap my arms around the back of his neck as his go to the back of my thighs and he lifts me onto the bench.
His teeth tug on my lip making an involuntary moan come from me, which makes him growl against my lips.
Oh God. The burst of adrenaline that travels through me when his lips touch mine makes me never want to stop.
He kisses me harder, pushing himself closer between my legs.
I lose my breath when his thumb rubs circles on my inner thigh.
“Axe.” I lean back. “I need you to know something so you don't get carried away.”
“What is it?” His dark eyes stare into mine.
“I'm a virgin,” I confess. He leans his forehead against mine.
“Thank you for trusting me with this.” Axe pecks my lips again then pulls away. I want to kiss him again but he's probably trying to be respectful after my confession. Axe stares at the food on the bench.
“I should finish cooking.” I step down from the bench and look at the food, suddenly not hungry for it. I hate to say I'm hungry for something else instead.
“Can I help? You could teach me to cook.” Axe looks willing to help.
“I'm still learning, but sure.” I chuckle. “How about you get some vegetables and dice them up while I fry the chicken?”
“On it chef,” he says humorously.
We move around the kitchen and there's something serene about it, doing something as simple as cooking together.
Even though we were just heavily making out, now we're making a meal together, I smile knowing we can go from a couple kissing to friends cooking in seconds.
I feel our still developing friendship will make it easier to become partners.
I notice Axe carefully cutting up the food into actual squares, making me laugh.
“What?” he asks, confused.
“You don't actually have to dice them into squares. They should just be small pieces.”
“Well it should be called cutting, not dicing.”
I watch him, now cutting the vegetables in big chunks. We cook dinner then sit in the living room and eat while we watch a movie. When we finish our food, Axe wraps his arm around me.
“Are you going to be secretive now that we're getting closer?” Axe turns to me.
“I don't know,” I mumble.
Getting closer to Axe means eventually opening up. That's not something I look forward to doing. But I guess he's in the same position as me. He'll eventually open up about the grief for his mate and I’ll open up about the abuse I've suffered.
“You don't have to be anymore.”