Chapter Thirty One
NATALIE
I stretched out on my couch, wishing more than ever that I had AC.
How was it this hot in here in September?
It was definitely cooler outside. I went to the fridge, opening it and standing in front of it for a couple seconds, but that only made it worse.
The living room seemed much hotter after that.
I couldn't believe Jake and Maddox had gotten into a fight over Vince. The guilt was choking me. Had I been too naive to think I could simply start a new chapter in my life and Vince would stay in the past where he belonged? Maybe I’d fooled myself into taking everything as a positive sign: meeting Jake, falling for him, and then getting this job with Maddox.
I sat on my couch, putting my legs under me. I felt utterly defeated.
The hurt on Jake’s face killed me, but I knew I needed time to think things through, and if he were here, I couldn’t do that.
Why couldn't Vince simply have cornered me at home?
Why did he have to go and make a spectacle at my workplace?
I was so mad at him. He'd broken that tender peace Jake and Maddox had finally found. I’d seen them over the past few weeks.
They'd definitely gotten closer. Now they were at odds again because of me.
The last thing I wanted was to drive them apart.
I remembered Jeannie's joy at her birthday, seeing all her grandsons together at the same table.
I messaged Larissa, desperately needing to talk to another human being.
Natalie: Hey, can I call you?
She replied a few seconds later.
Larissa: Sure.
Then she actually called me. I answered right away.
"Are you okay?" She sounded frantic.
"Why would I not be?"
"Because you're not a phone person. You prefer to message."
"True. I'm just feeling like crap. I miss my parents and my sisters. And with you gone too…"
She laughed. "I like where I am on your list of priorities."
"You know I love you."
"I know. What happened?"
"Vince happened."
"He showed up at your work again?"
I’d told her about the incident last week.
"Yes. And this time Jake was there too. He got mad that I didn't tell him, then got mad that Maddox didn't tell him. They had a fight, and then Jake and I had a fight. And I simply want to wake up and feel like none of this ever happened."
"Oh, poor baby. Wait, Jake left you alone? I'll kick his ass."
"No, he wanted to come with me. I just told him I needed to be alone."
"Why? If I had that hunk of a man, I would jump his bones every chance I got. I definitely wouldn't tell him to leave me alone."
"I don't know. I just… I was so distraught watching them fight."
"You have to do something about Vince."
"I know. I've been far too relaxed about it, but obviously he's just going to keep bothering me, and that won't do." I couldn’t believe I’d brushed this off for so long. To be honest, until he showed up at work, I genuinely thought he’d give up.
I didn't like conflict, but I wouldn't allow anyone to simply walk over me like this. His temper was even worse than I remembered. We fought a lot, and he often yelled, but he’d never behaved like this.
"Whatever's happening with him, he’s definitely on a destructive course, and I want him out of my life ASAP.”
"What are you going to do about Jake?"
"Right now, I don't know. And I don't want to talk about it anymore. I want you to distract me. Tell me something cool."
"Well, I didn't want to spoil my secret yet, but honestly, coming to Bali is the best thing I ever did."
"I'm so happy for you. How long do you think you'll stay away? No pressure."
"I might extend my stay here a bit longer. I like it, and people seem to really respond to the online classes I shoot out here."
"It does look very soothing."
She was always posting yoga classes with a backdrop of lush green scenery. Sometimes I was so relaxed by the view and the sound of birds chirping and water flowing nearby that I forgot to do the routine altogether.
"Natalie, we can't not talk about Jake."
"I know, but not tonight. I know I'll lose him, so I don't think I can talk about it at all." My body was physically rejecting the idea. My stomach cramped, my heart was heavy, and my throat was itchy.
"Okay. Then I'm going to talk about something else," Larissa said. "I'm going on a date tonight."
"Tell me all the details. Wait a second. My phone is beeping. Mom is calling," I said, surprised. She was usually asleep at this time. "Sorry, I need to answer so I can make sure nothing's wrong, okay?"
"Sure. We’ll talk another time. I have to go film a class anyway."
“Okay. Bye.” I switched calls, putting the phone back to my ear. "Hey, Mom. Is something wrong? Why are you up?"
"We’re having a party. And, darling, I have to say, it's quite a doozy."
My parents were partying at… what was it now? Two o'clock in the morning on the other side of the ocean. I chuckled. "Good for you. I'm glad."
"I figured I'd give you a call. I know it's late for you, but I just had this feeling."
She always said she had a sixth sense when it came to her daughters needing her. That had always proved to be true.
"Mom, you’re really good at this."
"Darling, tell me everything."
I hesitated because I hadn't told them about Vince showing up last week either. But I had to brace myself and fess up. I didn't like to have secrets, not with my parents or anyone. Look what happened with Jake.
Mom listened carefully, the way she always did.
"Oh, baby girl," she said when I'd finished. "I'm so sorry we're far away from you. Dad and I can book the fastest flight back we can afford and be with you."
"No, Mom. Don't do that, okay? My sister needs you more than I do." Right now I wasn't sure that was particularly true, but I couldn't be so selfish. I'd get back on my feet, whereas my sister had a colicky baby to deal with. She definitely needed my parents more.
"There's nothing you can do about Jake and Maddox. Don't blame yourself."
"You don't know them, Mom. They just recently found a balance."
"If it's so precarious that one fight was all it took for it to destabilize, then it wasn't very good to begin with."
I disagreed with Mom but didn't tell her so. I didn't want to hurt her feelings. She was only trying to help.
"Natalie, you’ve always tried to fix stuff without anyone interfering.
If you had trouble at school, you didn't want anyone involved.
Not your sisters, or your dad, or me. I respected that we're all different.
I knew you'd always love us because we were family.
I know how you feel about Jake, but don't let him doubt it, okay? "
"Thanks, Mom."
She was right. But the truth was I didn't know if it would make a difference. But I loved him to the moon and back, and I wanted to make sure he knew that without a doubt.