Chapter 17 #2
Jameson closed in until he stood directly behind the boys. The puppy saw him first and began to wag her tail and whine. Kace had his hand over Bo’s mouth still. But Bo’s eyes rounded as he twisted and saw Jameson.
“Hi, fellows,” Jameson said quietly.
Kace’s head swung around, and Bo ducked away from Kace’s hold. In the next instant, Bo scrambled up and flung himself on Jameson. Rascal broke loose too, and charged at Jameson, yipping and happy that her adventure was almost over.
Jameson picked up Bo and hugged him back, the swell of emotion pushing into his throat. With his free hand, he fired a shot into the air, hoping Lottie would hear it and return to the ranch.
He whispered a silent prayer of gratefulness. Then, with Bo in one arm, he knelt in the narrow space. “Hey, Kace. It’s good to see you.”
Kace hesitated a moment before lifting his chin. “We’re going to town.”
“I see.” Jameson knew he had to choose his words carefully with Kace. He wanted to respect the boy but also convey that his running off was wrong and he couldn’t do it again. “It’s late in the day to be heading to town.”
Kace glanced up through the tree branches at the now-darkening sky. “I reckoned we could make it most of the way before it got too dark.”
“It’s a long ride by horse and even longer on foot.”
Kace paused as if he hadn’t thought of that.
“Even if you could make it, I don’t think Bo or Rascal could walk the whole way tonight.”
Bo laid his head on Jameson’s shoulder, probably already worn out.
Kace studied Bo and then glanced at Rascal before letting his shoulders slump. “Bo kept asking to go back,” he admitted. “And Rascal’s hungry.”
Jameson nodded. “It’s also not safe out here at night for two boys and a puppy.”
“I was keeping us safe so far.”
“Looks like you were.” Jameson spoke as levelly as he could. “But it’s hard to tell directions in the dark, and you never know what predators might be out.”
Kace’s gaze darted around the dark shadows caused by the trees, his expression holding enough fear for Jameson to see that the boy had already been worried about wild animals.
“I think it would be best to wait until morning if you’re determined to go to town.”
Kace heaved a sigh. “Okay.”
Jameson rubbed a hand over Kace’s head. “In the morning, if you still need to go, then you be sure to ask me first so that I can saddle up our horses and go along.”
“You’d do that?”
“Yes. Any time you need to leave the ranch, I’d like to know and so would your mother so that one of us can ride with you—at least until you’re a little older.”
“Me too?” Bo asked, his head still on Jameson’s shoulder.
“You too.” Jameson pressed a kiss to the boy’s head. “I can’t promise I’ll always be available to ride with you right away. But we can talk about it and make a plan.”
Kace was looking at him with wide eyes. “Would you really do that?”
“If you have a good reason for it, then I would.”
Guilt flashed across Kace’s face. “I wanted to go get the reverend so that you and Mother could get married.”
The boy was na?ve in thinking marriage could happen so easily.
“Listen, Kace.” Jameson wasn’t sure how to educate a four- and three-year-old on how the whole process worked, but he had to at least try. “I hope one day I can marry your mother. But we might have to be patient for that to happen.”
“But if we fetch the reverend, then you can do it.”
“Even with the reverend, your mother will have to agree to it. And she isn’t quite ready for that.”
Bo pulled back. “Why not?”
Because she’d been hurt by Dray and was afraid of getting into another relationship as a result. Because she feared having another failed marriage and ending up like her mother. Because she’d never seen a healthy and happy marriage and didn’t know how to have one for herself. To name a few reasons.
Of course, Jameson couldn’t state any of those.
“Your mother wants to make sure she’s doing the right thing,” he said slowly. “And we three men need to give her all the time she needs to make that decision.”
Kace sat up straighter.
“Will you be patient like me?” Jameson asked.
The two nodded solemnly.
“Good.” Jameson paused, then forced himself to tell them his resolution from earlier. “While we wait patiently, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll stay on the ranch and work and be a father to you.”
“You will?” Kace’s face lit up.
“You will?” Bo echoed.
“Yes. I love you both.”
As soon as the words were out, Kace hopped up and wrapped his arms around Jameson. Bo leaned back in and hugged Jameson’s neck.
Jameson’s heart filled again with that same strong emotion as when he’d located them—or when Cougar had. He embraced them in return and had the sudden picture of his father doing the same thing to him and Coleman when they’d been younger.
For as much conflict as Jameson had experienced with his father during that last year living in Colorado, he respected the way his father had raised him, how affectionate he’d been, how he’d expressed his love, and that he’d always shown it.
In fact, what if his father had been trying to love him during that last year, but Jameson had been too caught up in his own pain and troubles to realize it? Father had approached him several times after Sue Ellen’s death and tried to talk to him, but Jameson had pushed him away.
Even when he and Father had gotten into the big argument, the admonishment to get his life together had been well deserved.
Jameson could admit he’d been in a horrible spot, especially with his drinking.
Father had encouraged him to go east and attend college and do something productive with his life.
Jameson had wanted to believe his father had said that because he didn’t think carpentry was good enough or that Jameson was good enough.
But deep down, he knew Father loved him for who he was and had probably suggested going east to college not to be like Coleman but so that Jameson could get away from the hurt and heartache and have the chance to start over.
Had he been too harsh on Father all this time? Was it time to make peace with him?
Jameson finished hugging the boys, then released them. He supposed becoming a father for oneself put all the grievances against one’s own father into perspective.
“We need to be heading back.” He gently set both boys on their feet. “Your mother is very worried about you, and we can’t keep her waiting.”
Kace’s face fell. “She’s gonna be real mad at us for disobeying, isn’t she?”
“She’s disappointed you didn’t follow her instructions, which I hope you will always do from now on.”
The boys nodded. “We will.”
“Good. In the meantime, there are consequences for every choice we make.”
“Con-seek-ence?” Bo tried to pronounce the word, obviously not familiar with it.
“You chose to disobey her. Now you’ll have to accept whatever discipline she gives you.”
Bo stuck his bottom lip out. “Me don’t like discipline.”
“Discipline isn’t easy. But it makes us stronger.” Jameson reached for each of the boys’ hands and started back to where Cougar was waiting.
His statement to the boys was true in his case too. Father had chastised him and admonished him to change. In the end, Father had only wanted to make him stronger.
Jameson could see now, in hindsight, that Father had been right, that getting away was what he’d needed. The past year had shaped him into a stronger and better man. He still wasn’t sure he ever wanted to see Coleman again, but it was definitely past time to reconcile with his father.