Chapter 26
— chapter twenty-six
It had taken Jenna almost a week to feel completely better.
As soon as she got home from dropping Katie off at her parents’ house, she sat down at her desk and opened up the day’s mail.
She’d received three letters from her pen pals that morning.
One was from Liam in Germany, the second was from Laura Beth in Mexico, and the third was from Holly, her Amish pen pal in Pinecraft.
All three letters were full of news and inquiries about her. Holly, in particular, seemed concerned about how she was doing now that so much time had passed after Jimmy’s death.
Have you considered eventually dating again, Jenna? I hope you will. I promise, there’s nothing wrong with opening your heart to the idea.
Jenna supposed it was only natural that Holly would seem so concerned. She was older and had lost her husband years ago. She’d occasionally written that she’d had a difficult adjustment to widowhood.
Feeling as if Holly had read her mind, Jenna decided to write to her first.
As a matter of fact, I have been wrestling with some unexpected things. Holly, the truth is that I think I’ve fallen in love with the best man I’ve ever met. He’s kind to me, and he loves Katie too. But he’s also unsuitable. He’s an Englisher.
Jenna bit the end of her pen, then continued.
I honestly don’t know what to do. My heart is telling me that the Lord must have brought him into my life for a reason, but my brain continually reminds me that I took my baptism seriously and shouldn’t break those vows. I don’t know what to do.
She’d just flipped the first sheet over to write on the back when she heard a knock at the door.
A little burst of happiness filled her. Perhaps Nelson had been driving by and decided to stop in for a spell. As much as she enjoyed the way he and Katie got along, it would be so nice to focus completely on him.
And, yes, to have his attention be solely on her.
As much as she tried to ignore the signs, Jenna knew she was really starting to care for Nelson. She liked him. She liked him a lot. Sometimes when he smiled at her, she felt goose bumps on her arms or a little shiver up her spine. It might be wrong, but she was anxious to feel that way again.
Plus, of course, she needed to thank him again for taking such good care of her when she was sick. She needed to repay his kindness and generosity somehow. Maybe she could ask him if he’d like to come over for supper one day soon. She could make some of his favorite dishes.
If she ever discovered what they were.
When she heard the knock again, she hastily pulled open the door.
And then barely caught her feeling of disappointment as Doreen greeted her with a bright smile, an immaculate white kapp, and a rather pretty teal dress with no apron.
On her feet were white leather Keds. If it hadn’t been for her gray hair and fine lines around her eyes, the woman could have passed for a young bride.
“I’m so glad you are home, Jenna,” she said as she walked right inside. “I didn’t see all of the blinds up, so I wasn’t sure.”
“I just got home from taking my daughter to my parents’ house for a visit,” she explained as she hurried to pull up the living room shades. “I’m afraid I got so busy writing to one of my pen pals, I forgot to pull the shades up.”
While she pulled them up on one side of the room, Doreen crossed and took care of the other set. “You have a pen pal?”
“I do. I’ve got four of them.”
“Four? My word. Are they all friends of yours who moved away?”
“Not at all. Years ago, I came across a woman asking for prayers in The Budget. She was on her first missionary trip and was feeling lonely. I started writing to her. She happened to be in Germany. She moved on, but a friend of a friend started writing, mainly because he was interested in me being Amish.” Realizing that she could talk all day about her treasured pen pals, Jenna forced herself to stop.
“I started writing the others much the same way. They were friends of friends or other folks who enjoy letter-writing as much as I do.”
Doreen smiled. “I love that I just learned about this from you. I feel that we’re becoming good friends.”
“I feel the same way.” Feeling much better about her unexpected visitor, Jenna walked toward the kitchen. “Would you like a cup of kaffi?”
“I enjoy coffee, but it’s warm outside. A glass of water would be most welcome.”
“I’ll be right back.”
Doreen sat down. “Take your time, dear.”
Jenna was a little embarrassed about how she was dressed.
She was wearing an old work dress. The fabric was faded and even a little bit worn in places.
It was also still a little too big, thanks to all the weight she’d lost in the last few years.
“You look like a ragamuffin, Jenna,” she muttered to herself as she filled a water glass for Doreen and a coffee cup for herself.
Well, at least her bare feet were mud-free.
Maybe proper manners called for her to drink water too, but Jenna needed another cup of coffee in the worst way. She placed a few two-day-old cookies on a plate, summoned a composed expression, and walked into the living room. “Here you go.”
Doreen brightened. “You brought cookies too.” She picked one up. “What kind are they?”
“Monster cookies.”
“Those are yummy. Why, I’ve been known to eat these for breakfast,” she said as she pinched off a bite and popped it in her mouth.
Maybe it was Doreen’s exuberance, or maybe it was because Doreen had seemed interested in her pen-pal hobby, but whatever the reason, Jenna felt herself relax. “Are you visiting members today?” she asked.
“Not exactly,” she said around a second bite of cookie. “I mean, I was just visiting a woman out toward Dundee who’s a widow, but I’m afraid she is not a gut candidate for the widows club.”
That was surprising. “I’m assuming she’s a recent widow?” What else did a woman need to be in order to join?
Looking more serious, Doreen nodded. “She is, but she’s rather a sourpuss.”
Even though the woman was a stranger, Jenna felt as if she should stick up for her. “Perhaps she’s still grief-stricken. Grief can make a person act out of sorts.”
“I don’t disagree with you there. Grief takes all shapes and forms. But . . . in this woman’s case, I got the feeling that her grieving is not what has soured her mood.” She took a sip of water. “I might even go so far as to say, she’s probably been unpleasant to be around for years.”
The outlandish comment startled a laugh from her. Mortified, she covered her lips.
Doreen’s own lips looked like they were trying hard not to curve up on the edges too.
“Don’t be embarrassed, dear Jenna. I know I sound shocking.
But to be honest, I’ve gotten tired of always saying the correct thing.
Sometimes I’d rather err on the side of .
. .” She frowned as her voice drifted off.
“Honesty?”
“Exactly.” She popped the last of her cookie into her mouth, then leaned back and crossed her legs.
“Anyway, after hiring the driver to take me out there, he dropped me back home, and then I started getting organized for tomorrow’s meeting.
” She brightened again. “And that, my dear, is why I am here.”
“Oh?”
“Beth Ann was going to host, but I’m afraid she got called out of town. One of her daughters is due to deliver her seventh babe. The due date was set for next month, but I guess the midwife and doctor are thinking that she’s going to deliver early. As you might imagine, she needed a helping hand.”
“Sivva kinner. That is a lot.”
“I know! I was glad the Lord decided that three was enough for my body to take. Four more might have made me batty,” she added with a wink.
“Or at least in need of earplugs.” Katie’s adorable laughter made her smile, but it could be shrill at times. Just imagining six other bodies creating noise made her wince.
“Right? Seven children must make for a loud and boisterous household. But a happy one too, I imagine.” She smiled. “In any case, Beth Ann is now out of town and we are in need of a hostess for tomorrow. What do you think?”
“About what?” She took another sip of coffee, wondering how rude it would be to fill it up again.
“Hostessing, of course.”
“Hostessing?”
“Indeed.” Doreen looked around the room. “To be sure, your haus is small, but it has the benefit of being secluded. I bet you hardly see anyone driving by.”
“I don’t see too many Amish folks. Mainly vehicles.” Mainly Nelson.
“See, that’s a good thing for our almost-secret club.
” Sitting up a little bit straighter, she added, “Plus, the weather is supposed to be mighty nice. We could all gather in the backyard. I bet there’s plenty of room there.
Let’s go look, shall we?” Doreen stood up.
“Is the back door through here?” She pointed at the kitchen.
“Yes,” she answered before she could stop herself.
“Wonderful.” Doreen charged forward without waiting for Jenna to lead the way.
She followed slowly, grimacing as she spied both the morning’s and last night’s supper dishes in the sink.
She really should not have lingered over her devotional that morning or been so anxious to write her pen pals when she got home from her parents’.
She should’ve washed those dishes the moment she got out of bed.
Whether Doreen noticed the dirty sink or not was up in the air. Because she opened the back door and stepped right outside. “This will be so nice,” she called out as Jenna hurried out to join her.
Nice? Looking at everything with an appraising eye, Jenna frowned. “I don’t know if my backyard is suitable for company or not.”
“No?”
“It’s . . . um, much like a field.” Sure, the man she paid to mow the grass had come recently, and a gardener had also stopped by last Saturday to trim some of her bushes.
But other than short grass and pruned bushes, she didn’t think the space had much going for it.
“There isn’t much here.” No cove of shady trees. No firepit. No beautiful flower garden.
“I disagree, dear. Look at all the space! We could have a nice-sized gathering.” Doreen pointed to her right. “We can put two card tables over there to hold drinks and snacks.”
Jenna could maybe envision it. If she had two card tables. Or if she wanted to host a meeting. However, she did not. She couldn’t exactly come right out and tell Doreen that, though. Could she? “I don’t have any fold-up tables or chairs. Where would everyone sit?”
“That won’t be a problem. I’ll ask everyone to bring a chair.”
“Women won’t mind carting around a chair?”
“Oh, not a real one, child. You know what I mean. One of those folding contraptions one buys to take to the park.” She clapped her hands. “It will be great fun. Like a picnic. But not.”
It wouldn’t be anything like a picnic. Like . . . not at all.
Turning to her, Doreen stared at her intently. “Jenna, I know this isn’t something you’re comfortable with, and you are probably feeling overwhelmed.”
“Yes. Yes, I am.” Somehow she was supposed to get everything together and host in a day?
“We really are in a bind. Desperate.”
“Desperate?”
“We really want to have a meeting, dear. Plus, I think it would be good for you.”
At the moment, all she could think was that this meeting was going to give her an ulcer.
“Everyone needs to get out of her comfort zone from time to time. This will shake things up a bit.”
“This will certainly do that.”
“I reckon it will,” Doreen said softly. “Please say yes. And don’t think you’ll be completely responsible for setting everything up.
I’ll have Violet and Anne stop by with some card tables and water bottles and such.
All you will have to do is offer some easy-to-carry-around snacks.
” She looked at her intently. “And a good attitude. What do you think, Jenna? You have such a pretty smile. Could you try to make sure everyone feels welcome?”
Doreen was making hosting sound so simple. “I could do that,” she murmured before she could stop herself.
Triumph seemed to gleam in Doreen’s eyes. “So, does that mean you’ll host the next meeting of the Amish Widows Club, Jenna?”
Feeling like she was caught between a rock and a hard place, Jenna nodded.
“I’m so glad.” Doreen reached out and clasped her left hand with both of her own. “Danke, Jenna. I’m so grateful.”
What had she just done? Feeling as if she were looking through a foggy haze, she cleared her throat. “You are welcome,” she replied. “I am glad to help.”
The other woman released her hand and gave a little clap. “Well, now that that’s settled, I must be on my way. Plus, I’m sure your mind is spinning with all the things you’ve got to do.”
“Ah, yes. I suppose it is.”
“I’ll have the message about tomorrow’s meeting on the recording within the hour, and I’ll come over an hour before so I can help you get everything in order,” Doreen added as she headed to the driveway.
Moments later, she gave Jenna a little wave and then climbed onto her electric bike.
Off she went, leaving Jenna’s house in almost the exact shape as before. Only her head seemed to be in disarray.
Why had she agreed to host so quickly? She’d only attended a few of the meetings. She barely knew most of the women. What would they think of her small house? Or having to bring a lawn chair and sit in the backyard?
She gazed up at the sky. Plus, what if it rained? What would she do then?
“I suppose if it rains, you will get wet,” she murmured to herself.
The idea of all the women coming over with lawn chairs in hand, then having to seek shelter in her house while it poured was almost laughable. They would be packed inside like sardines.
But there was no need to dwell on that, Jenna decided as she walked back inside her kitchen.
She couldn’t stop the rain any more than she could stop the sun from rising. When Blue began walking in a figure-eight pattern between her legs, taking care to rub his glossy black-and-white coat against her calves each time he made a pass, Jenna picked him up and cuddled him in her arms.
“Why didn’t you show yourself while Doreen was here? She might have been allergic to you and scurried away to the next unsuspecting widow.”
Blue studied her face with his lovely silver eyes. “Mew.”
“Mew, indeed, cat.”
Returning to the couch, she sat down and ran her hand along Blue’s back. Listened to him purr. Thought again about how easily Doreen had convinced her to agree to hosting.
But maybe it hadn’t been much of a decision anyway. She’d known from the beginning that the women took turns hosting the group.
Sooner or later, it would’ve been her turn.
Or maybe she’d agreed because Doreen strong-armed her. Maybe Doreen—and the Lord—were determined to remind Jenna that there were other women who had been going through some of the same things she was.
She didn’t have to handle everything on her own. She could find their support . . . if she allowed herself to receive it.
Maybe that was what was going on.
After all, it wasn’t like she could ever have a future with Nelson. She needed to remind herself about that.