Chapter 12
With Enhart’s warning ringing in my ears, I spent the following afternoon searching for someone to practice on. I still hadn’t warmed to the idea, but we’d spent so much time on psychal already, and the solstice grew closer with each passing day. Enhart was right, godsdamn him.
I wandered aimlessly through the corridors.
Most of the castle’s inhabitants were asleep at this hour, and I was prepared to abandon my efforts when I spied a tow-headed valet leaning against the wall by the servants’ stairs.
His name was Peter, if I recalled correctly.
He worked the evening shift, so we had rarely interacted when I was a chambermaid.
He was alone, his nose buried in the well-worn book in his hands. Casting a quick glance down the corridor to ensure the coast was clear, I spied on him from behind a bushy fern.
His eyes widened as they raced across the text in his hands.
I exhaled slowly, reaching out with my will like Enhart had instructed.
Peter’s emotions reached me first, his nerves skittering over my skin.
I pushed past them, coming up against something pillowy instead of an icy wall.
It was inviting, almost. As if happy to let me in.
Captain Vindergard threw the frail maiden over his muscled shoulder, her copper hair falling over her face as she squealed with fear …
or was it pleasure? Her round ass high in the air, he marched into his quarters as the drunken cheers from his crew rose around them.
He planned to make her forget all about the husband she’d left behind when her ship took to the sea.
He tossed her roughly onto his canopied bed, grinning as she sank into the pillows, her sea-green eyes wide.
With one hand, he untied his laces to release his bulging—
I clapped a hand over my mouth to thwart the furious giggle that threatened to escape.
Steeling myself, I dove back into his mind, pushing past the pirate’s titillating escapades and into his memories.
An array of moving images appeared in rapid succession—skipping stones on a green pond where the air was warm and thick with the scent of wild sage.
The prickle of lute strings against uncalloused fingers as an off-key note hung in the air.
The slamming of a door as a woman, perhaps his lover, was swept into the arms of another.
Perhaps that explained why he was reading the adventures of Captain Vindergard?
I marveled at the series of memories that seemed almost endless.
I wondered if it was possible to get lost in someone’s mind, doomed to replay their memories over and over.
The thought weakened my hold on him, and the adventures of Captain Vindergard rang in my ears again.
The captain let out a groan as Cassandra’s tongue ran down his—
“Finn?”
I was pulled roughly out of Peter’s mind, my heart pounding as if I had just sprinted from here to the cellars. My eyelids fluttered as remnants of the man’s memories seeped out of my sight. Niamh stood beside me, her eyes wide.
“Are you alright?” she asked.
“Yes, you just startled me,” I said, straightening.
Her eyes flicked down the corridor. “Why were you spying on Peter?”
I retreated down the hall so as not to be overheard, Niamh trailing after me. “I wasn’t. I was just practicing.”
“Practicing what?”
“Prince Enhart is making me practice projecting my psychal magic. It’s like taking a look into someone’s mind.”
“That seems incredibly violating,” she said flatly.
I faltered. “It’s not as bad as it sounds, I promise. Besides, I have to practice if I want to make it onto the council by the summer solstice.”
“I can’t believe you would do something like that.”
“Trust me, if you knew what he was reading you might actually find it kind of funny.”
She didn’t laugh. “Let me guess, you picked him because he’s a servant?”
My palms grew clammy. “No,” I insisted.
Her voice became icy. “You think you’re better than us.”
“You’re putting words in my mouth,” I protested.
“I know how their kind thinks,” she said. “How they treat the staff. You’re becoming one of them.”
I stiffened. “You don’t know how they think,” I countered. “How could you?”
The moment that the words left my lips, I regretted them.
Niamh seethed, her face pinching into a scowl.
I paused. She had always been so even-tempered.
Now, though, the bitter tang of envy oozed from her pores.
Images danced behind my eyes. Niamh sitting alone in my chambers on the night of the Winter Solstice, the whispers from the other maids about my burgeoning relationship with the King ringing in her ears.
She promised she’d always be one of us, she said to Maxence, her eyes red.
“I am still one of you,” I said aloud.
She drew in a breath. “What did you say?”
My jaw snapped shut. I had slipped into her mind without even meaning to. I had done exactly what she was accusing me of. Exactly what I was constantly telling Enhart not to do to me. “I didn’t,” I stammered. “I didn’t mean to.”
“Don’t you ever look in my mind again,” she seethed. She turned furiously on one heel, stomping down the corner and out of sight.
I sat opposite Mordric at dinner, angrily stabbing my meal.
I’d taken most of my dinners alone in my quarters in recent weeks, so exhausted from training that I could barely scarf down a single mouthful.
Tonight, I joined Mordric alone at his invitation.
Enhart had excused me from several nights of training in order to find more unwitting strangers to practice on, but I’d instead spent hours wandering the castle alone, too upset over my argument with Niamh to even try.
“Is something wrong?” Mordric asked, eyeing me warily.
I shook my head. “No.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
He rose, dragging his chair behind him so that he could sit beside me. “I’m not sure if you’re aware of this, but your emotions are usually written quite plainly across your face. Tell me what’s wrong.”
I huffed, letting my silverware clatter onto the table. “It’s Niamh.”
“What about Niamh?”
“We had a stupid argument.”
He took my hand, bringing my fingers to his lips. I sighed as he kissed me there, siphoning some of the bitterness from my heart.
“About what, exactly?” he asked.
“Enhart says that learning to block psychal magic is one thing, but I need to know how to project it, too.”
“I agree with him.”
“Except I can’t get past his wards,” I groaned. “It’s like coming up against a wall of solid ice. He told me that while I work up my strength, I should practice on an easier target to help build my abilities.”
“I see.”
“I tried it, and it worked. But I chose one of the valets to practice on, and Niamh caught me. She’s furious.”
“She doesn’t understand.”
“That’s what I said! Except …” I trailed off as he ran his thumb along my wrist. It was incredibly distracting.
“Except what?” he asked.
“I may have accidentally looked into her mind while we were arguing. Which she didn’t appreciate,” I admitted.
“I see.”
I bit the inside of my cheek, my fingertips trailing along the edge of the thick tablecloth. “Do you think what I did was wrong?” I asked in a whisper.
“No, but it seems like you might.”
The fire crackled as he flipped my hand over in his, touching his lips to my wrist. “I have a proposition for you.”
“Mmm?”
“First, allow me to insist that your penitence is unwarranted. Your ability to enter the minds of others is paramount to your future role as my adviser.”
“I know.”
“However, you are a deeply empathetic person. I’m not sure even a king’s encouragement would be enough to sway you. Niamh will forgive you, but perhaps she just needs time.”
I sighed. “Perhaps.”
“In the meantime, I propose we explore an alternative to help further your training. One that I feel would be guilt-free.”
“Oh?”
“Practice on me.”
My lips parted in disbelief. “Really?”
He nodded. “Enhart’s not exactly the trusting sort, which is why he will refuse to lower his wards until you can break through them yourself. My mind, on the other hand, is open to you.”
My breath caught in my throat. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything,” he said. “I consider it a duty to the realm to help you, and I am happy to do it.”
“Thank you.”
He brushed his thumb along the length of my jaw, coaxing a quiet gasp from between my lips. “Go ahead.”
I took his hands in mine, our heads bowed toward each other.
I shut out the crackling fire, the shuffling of steel-clad boots in the corridors outside.
With Enhart’s instructions ringing in my ears, I reached my will out to Mordric’s.
His mind was not nearly as easy to penetrate as the valet’s, but after a few tries, I was able to worm my way in just the same.
My skin rippled into gooseflesh as I explored.
Can you hear me? came a voice. His voice.
Yes, I replied.
Very good.
Your mind is different from the human’s, I observed. It’s like a maze.
Well I couldn’t let all my wards down. What fun would that be?
I grinned.
How does it feel?
Strange, but also somehow familiar.
I suppose that makes sense. Now, I’m sure Enhart plans to instruct you in the art of prying through someone’s thoughts and memories, but I wondered if I might show you something instead.
I blinked my eyes open. A sly grin played on his lips. Okay, I agreed.
He brushed his fingertips over my eyelids, beckoning me to close them again.
The walls in his mind parted like curtains to reveal— I inhaled sharply.
The sensations that flooded me caused nearly every muscle in my body to go taut.
The cool tingle of silken sheets against my skin, the carnal sounds of lovemaking ringing in my ears. My fingers curled inwards.