Chapter 21 Trish
Trish
I couldn’t stop shaking. That’d been too close. If Jaxon wasn’t there… If the ward hadn’t held because of me… If my cursed magic hurt him…
I needed to get out of here.
What was I thinking? That my magic would somehow fix itself after half a life of being broken? I was so stupid. It was all because of the summons. That’s what filled my head with dumb ideas. I’d somehow hoped it meant they knew something I didn’t. Like that I actually belonged here.
This was a mistake.
If only someone had told you that.
I put as much distance as I could between me and my coven, heading toward the tents of the festival. Hopefully they’d let me leave without a fuss, because I was not sticking around to see what other damage I could cause.
I’d run into Charles this morning in my haste to get food and then arrive at the training on time. Maybe he’d still be where I left him—hungover and cleaning up breakfast—and we could spend the day together. With no magic.
I was never using my magic again.
“Tisiphone, wait,” Jaxon called after me.
I picked up the pace. After last night… I don’t know what I thought. That things would be different? That I could face him on equal ground? Why didn’t he understand that I needed him to leave me alone?
I couldn’t protect everyone if they didn’t stay away. Panic squeezed my throat, making it hard to breathe. This couldn’t happen. I made a huge mistake.
Jaxon growled as he crashed into my path. His eyes blazed with fury. “Are you seriously going to run away again?”
I shouldn’t have blamed him for being upset, but everything in me hurt. “Someone like you wouldn’t understand.”
“Someone like me?” He moved, blocking my attempt at an escape. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him how perfect he was, how I’d never live up to his standards, but I’d embarrassed myself enough for one lifetime.
“Please,” I whispered. “Let me go.”
Jaxon’s hands hovered on either side of my arms like he was going to grab me. For a second, I wished he would. Touching him had done something to my magic. Ignited it in a way I’d almost forgotten.
Then he dropped his hands.
“It wasn’t you,” he said.
My gaze went to his face. “What?”
“The ice. The darkness on the ward. It wasn’t you,” he explained, lowering his voice as he looked over my shoulder. “Vincent controls the weather.”
“That’s impossible.” I shook my head. “You don’t have to lie to me.”
“I’d never lie to you,” Jaxon growled, and I knew he meant it. “I saw it with my own eyes. He can manipulate the wind. The clouds gathered at his call. I think he can control ice and rain too.”
“That’s not….” My eyes widened as I thought through the implications. “Jaxon, that’s not possible.”
“Isn’t it, though?” He looked at me.
I heard what he wasn’t saying. That much power was unheard of for a witch or warlock. Sure, some of us could draw from the elements. But controlling them? I’d only ever met one other being with that kind of strength, and thank the gods, he knew not to mess with it unless absolutely necessary.
According to all the stories, legends and myths before our time, power of that magnitude corrupted anyone who tried to wield it. But those were just stories.
Weren’t they?
You better hope so.
“There’s more,” Jaxon barely breathed the words. I strained to hear him, stepping onto my toes. “Sarah Ossory has gone missing. Her coven thinks Vincent has something to do with it. You were right to stay here and find more information on him. Kera will want to know this.”
I was right. I smiled, staring up into his earthy brown eyes. They were so deep and steadfast. A girl could get lost in them.
“So you see…” Jaxon smiled. “Your magic isn’t that powerful.”
I gasped, taking a step back. “It is too.”
When I saw one of Vincent’s warlocks pass by, I understood the abrupt change of conversation.
But he didn’t have to be so rude.
“Your magic definitely wasn’t strong enough to break my ward,” Jaxon said.
“Our ward, you mean.” My eyes narrowed.
He shrugged. “Seemed like I was doing most of the work back there.”
“Are you kidding me?” I cried. “It was a team effort.”
“Sure.” Jaxon shoved his hands in his pockets, whistling as he started walking away.
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“Herbs and potions testing is next.” Damn his stupid, arrogant grin. “This one should be easy, even for a broken witch like you.”
*
I couldn’t not stay after his blatant challenge. Plus, a part of me was clinging to hope that Jaxon was right and I hadn’t messed up the ward. That my magic had somehow been a part of us passing that trial. And I wouldn’t lie, it felt good to be using some magic again.
The long table was set up at the far side of the field with unlabeled bundles of dried herbs in the center. I took an open spot in front of the empty vials. Of course, Jaxon claimed the space across from me.
I didn’t look at him, choosing to focus on the herbs instead as I tried to identify them by their flowers and leaves. I was good at herbology. Gram and Mom had made sure of it. Even my non-witch sisters knew their way around tinctures and potions.
It was Earth’s magic—not mine—so it wasn’t that hard not to mess up. Though if it involved complicated steps or an oven, count me out.
“Each witch or warlock gets two vials, one mortar and pestle, and five minutes.” Vincent stood at the head of the table, explaining the rules. “The objective is to make a poison to take down your enemy and the antidote for it. Your time starts now.”
He flipped a sand glass over on the table and stepped back, watching us all with his judging eyes.
My fingers were already twitching as dozens of hands reached for the bundles of herbs. I was careful not to touch anything I didn’t know so I wouldn’t contaminate my workspace. Now was not the time to experiment with my affliction.
Please don’t blow us up. My wolf hid behind her paws.
I ignored her, scanning the rapidly dwindling pile of herbs and broken stems left behind. Long fingers I knew intimately reached across the table and dropped a bundle of belladonna with berries still attached right in front of me.
I glared at him. “I don’t need your help.”
“Are you sure about that?” He glanced at the sand glass. “You’re running out of time.”
I growled as I used the vial to scoop the berries into, adding more than ten to make it extra potent, and found a stick to crush them right inside the glass jar. This would hurt to swallow.
Alec would be proud.
I tossed the berry-stained stick under the table and searched through the discarded piles of herbs for… bingo.
Jaxon was still looking as I made quick work of the mugwort and fennel in the pestle before carefully filling the second vial. He grabbed the mugwort from the table. I corked my vials and tossed him the remaining fennel.
“There. We’re even,” I said, finally taking a breath as I looked around at the others. The rest of our coven were just finishing up their own vials. They’d moved closer to us, standing on Jaxon’s side of the table to be near him, as they should.
He was a caring Alpha. Even to wolves outside his own pack. One day, he’d make some female very happy.
My heart twisted at that thought.
It wasn’t my place to judge him or his future mate. He deserved a good, fulfilled life. Maybe I should’ve just stayed back at the tent like he asked. I didn’t belong here, and I was too busy trying to survive these tests to get any information myself. Jaxon didn’t need me. I was only a liability.
Tomorrow, Alec should be back with Alpha Kera. Jaxon would let her know what he’d learned, and she’d tell us what to do. I might as well go enjoy the festival while I still had time, before I returned to Three Sisters Cleaning and the life fate had chosen for me.
“Time’s up.” Vincent tipped the sand glass, resuming his position at the head of the table. “Your partner is the person directly across from you. Between the two of you, choose one to take the other’s poison and then the antidote.”
“No.” My stomach bottomed out as my gaze shot to Jaxon’s face.
He was smiling, but his expression gave nothing else away. It wasn’t until I heard the breaking glass that I realized he’d smashed his vials with the mortar.
“Oops,” he said. “Looks like we’ll have to test yours.”
No! My wolf thrashed within me, threatening to break through my skin.
“You have sixty seconds,” Vincent said. “One… Two….”
The table erupted into a panic. I could barely hear everyone screaming and arguing over the thudding of my own heart.
Jaxon’s face was a mask of calm as he held out a steady hand.
“Absolutely not.” I grabbed the vials.
“Give them to me,” Jaxon commanded.
I shook my head as I held them to my chest. My breaths came shorter. I couldn’t. If anything happened to him, I’d die.
I wasn’t even supposed to be here. Screw this insane warlock’s game, I was done.
Jaxon moved so fast, I didn’t have time to blink as he snatched the vial of belladonna from my hand. In a horrifying second, he’d uncorked the vial and swallowed the contents. His face grew pale as he reached for the antidote.
Powerless to stop this trajectory, I handed it to him, then yanked my hand back to my chest. My heart was in my throat. My wolf went deadly still. I didn’t so much as breathe, terrified that I’d do something to tip the scales in the wrong direction.
Jaxon raised the vial to his lips and downed the liquid. His throat worked as he swallowed. Tremors racked his body. He coughed into his fist.
Please. Gods. Please. I grabbed the edge of the table, my knuckles turning white as I looked for more antidotes. Charcoal, maybe, to bind with the toxins in the gut. Or something to induce vomiting.
Jaxon tossed the empty vials onto the table and cleared his throat. “See? No problem.”
I looked up at his playful smile.
He’s okay! My wolf howled.
I inhaled a full breath, tasting the sweet moment of relief. I did it. Simple witchcraft. No one died. He…
I let out a war cry as I leapt over the table and slammed my fists against his chest.
“I’m going to kill you, you fucking idiot!” I screamed as Jaxon staggered back. He was caught off guard. It was the only reason I was able to move him, but I didn’t relent.
“What is wrong with you?” I shoved him again. “How could you do this to me?”
“Tisiphone, stop.” He regained his footing and held up his hands. “I watched you make both the poison and the antidote. You did everything right. I wasn’t afraid.”
“You should’ve been.” My body shook with rage as I clenched my fists at my side. “This isn’t a joke. Even simple spells I can screw up in an instant. My magic isn’t the same anymore.”
“Really?” He cocked an eyebrow. “Because your magic has been working just fine today.”
“That’s not…” My voice trailed off when I realized we were drawing the attention of the whole testing grounds.
“That’s not what?” Jaxon pressed, like he always did. “Because you know what I think? The signs are all there.”
“Stop,” I whispered, feeling the eyes on me.
“No.” Jaxon growled. “This has gone on long enough. It’s time someone called you out.” His wolf flashed in his eyes as he towered over me. “Your magic works just fine when you’re with me and your coven.”
“I don’t have a coven,” I whispered, taking a step away. And I caught Gentry’s eye as I said that. Watched his face fall. “Wait… I didn’t mean—”
“That’s right,” Jaxon snarled. My anger unleashed something in him I’d never seen before. “No coven. No mate. Reject us. That’s what you’re good at.”
It was as if he’d shot an arrow through my heart and I clutched my chest, eyes filling with tears as I stared up at him. “I never rejected any of you.”
“Didn’t you?” The pain on his face was all too real, betraying a truth I’d been too blind to see.
Somehow, I had a memory of that day in the graveyard. After hearing my Gram corner Jaxon, telling him to protect me at all costs.
“I release you from your vow, Jaxon Cadejo.”
“No.” I shook my head. “Not like that. It’s not how I meant it.”
“Maybe not.” All the humor drained from tone. “But how many times since then have you said the same thing? How often have you pushed me away?”
“I was trying to keep you safe,” I cried.
“That’s not an excuse.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “I had nothing, but still I gave you everything, crawling back like a starving wolf for a scrap of your attention, only for you to deny me again.”
The tears were falling now in earnest. I closed my eyes, wishing everyone would stop watching as Jaxon ripped my heart out. “I didn’t know.”
“Sure you didn’t.” His voice was cold. “If that’s true, you’re a bigger fool than I am.”
“Jaxon, please…” I begged.
“Please, what?” He growled. “Go away? Leave you alone? Stop caring? Stop loving you? Stop hoping you won’t tear me to shreds every time we meet?”
“Just stop!” I screamed, slamming my palms against his chest.
My eyes went wide as I felt his power course through me. Like old times. Before, when my magic worked and I could sense the magic in others, using it as my own.
It’d been so long since I had this sensation. Now I could feel Jaxon’s power. His deep well of earth-based magic that welled up in him, moments before he went flying backwards, thrown by the shift in the ground that rocked the world beneath our feet.
Oh gods, it’s back.
As if time froze, I watched the pulse of my power spread out, sending everyone who’d gathered around us stumbling to their knees while the earth groaned and quaked.
But it was Jaxon’s shocked expression as he landed on the dirt and the rapidly reforming cracks in the ground that stole my breath away.
I’d done it. My magic was back.
I… I hurt Jaxon.
I’d screwed up everything.
Time raced to catch up as everyone broke out talking at once and climbed to their feet.
The only person who’d stayed standing in the pulse of that power started to slow clap.
I turned to face Vincent.
The warlock held out his hand. “Cerberus, isn’t it? Come take a walk with me. I’ve been hoping to meet you.”