Chapter 31 Trish
Trish
He was gentle. Achingly so. And my body physically burned for him. How I’d gone my entire life without this, I didn’t know. But I was eager to make up for lost time.
Our kisses lingered, swallowing sounds I never knew I could make, as we tried to stay quiet in the tent that trapped our heat and scents, combining them into something magic that felt a lot like home.
I lost track of time. Of all rational sense.
All I knew was that I belonged here, wrapped in Jaxon’s arms as our bodies moved together like they were always meant to be. When he thrust into me, I matched his pace, chasing that high yet again.
“Right there,” I whispered against his lips.
His kiss was gentle, but I could feel him. His wolf, holding back. When he thrust deeper, I moaned, turning my cheek to his bed of furs and looking for something to muffle the sound of my coming orgasm.
His teeth stilled against my neck. Instinctually, I arched against him, giving better access.
Go on, my wolf urged. Complete the bond.
“No,” I growled.
Jaxon froze.
“Don’t stop,” I begged. “Just don’t bite.”
“You’re mine,” he growled against my skin, moving his hips in that delicious way again.
“I am.” I panted as he resumed the pace. “But I can’t show back up with a mating mark. Vincent will know.”
Jaxon propped up onto his hands so he hovered over me. “That argument doesn’t make me want to stop.”
It didn’t sound very good to me either.
Because it isn’t. My wolf sighed.
When Jaxon moved his hips, I forgot what we were talking about. He felt so right. So good. Every time he touched me, it was like he’d been doing this all along. My body responded easily to his, just as his did to mine.
We belonged together. I knew it like I knew my own name. What I didn’t know was why it’d taken me so long to figure this out.
Jaxon reached between us to stroke my clit, bringing me right to the edge again. I opened my legs wider and locked my ankles behind his thighs, trying to accept him deeper, as deep into my soul as he could go.
“That’s right.” His teeth grazed my neck, not hard enough to bite, but enough to remind me of the pressure there. “Who do you belong to?”
“I’m yours,” I panted again, knowing he needed to hear it. And the way he gathered me to his chest, the flex of him inside of me as he thrust once, twice more. That groan of his that I felt deep in my core. His hot seed filling me within…
I cried out my orgasm as his lips crashed over mine, drinking in the sound. Jaxon rolled us both to the side and gathered me into his arms, holding me steady as our frantic hearts slowed in tune to each other.
“I can’t…” Jaxon panted, catching his breath as he gripped me tighter and nuzzled my neck to scent mark, “…let you go.”
I didn’t want him to.
The loss of what could’ve been had we sealed the bond was a growing ache in my chest. It pulled at the primitive parts of me, begging to be whole.
Once our bond was completed, I wouldn’t have to struggle to find the words.
He’d be able to read me, to sense my emotions and see my memories as if they were his own.
And I needed that. I needed him to know what he meant to me.
I wiggled in his arms, getting loose enough to look up at his handsome, sleepy face, and despite wanting to bare my soul to him, I could only think to say, “I screwed up.”
Jaxon chuckled as he kissed the tip of my nose. “We both did.”
“No, you didn’t mess up,” I rushed to defend him. “I’m the one with the issues. The one who thought I wasn’t good enough for you, and the one who thought I was dragging you down.”
“How could you think that?” He scoffed. “I’m clearly the only one who wasn’t good enough here.”
“Will you stop?” I couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re the powerful Alpha wolf-witch. I’m the broken reject with serious family issues.”
“Your family is a bit much,” Jaxon agreed, and I realized he’d seen more of my own family than I had over the past few days.
“They are. And I’m sorry in advance for whatever they’ll do to you and for all that I’ve already done to you too.” Tears burned behind my eyes as I admitted that. It was hard to realize out loud how messed up I really was. “I’m a selfish asshole.”
“You’re the most selfless person I know,” Jaxon growled. I was ashamed to admit that sound did a number to my lady bits. “None of this is your fault.”
“Of the two of us, I’d say this is most definitely my fault.” I knew I was rambling now.
“Then it was equally my fault.” He rested his hand on the side of my face, gently turning me so we were staring into each other’s eyes.
“I knew your family was close, but I never realized how much that smothered you. It was always my job to give you what you needed, and maybe you needed freedom. I just wish Lisa hadn’t made you promise to take care of your sisters.
I know you gave everything up for them.”
He couldn’t know that. Not even I really did. It was something I’d need to unpack… probably with years of therapy. But speaking of my gram’s promises brought a niggling feeling in my chest.
I needed to get back.
Five more minutes.
I smiled. “You know the worst part was that I always hoped you’d find your mate. I knew I’d hate her, but I couldn’t stomach the thought of you being alone. That’s why I wrote you letters and tried to keep up our friendship even though I always wanted you and could never have—”
This kiss wasn’t as urgent as the ones we’d shared throughout the night, but he always knew the right thing to do. His lips were a tender caress, shutting me up and hinting at promises for a better future despite our troubled past.
And it was the most painful thing I ever pulled away from.
“I have to go,” I whispered.
Jaxon rested his forehead against mine. “No.”
“You don’t understand.” I stiffened in his arms. “Vincent is crazy. I think he’s performing blood magic. But I can’t accuse him of that without proof. If I could just find out his motivation…”
“His motivation is power,” Jaxon said. “Absolute power corrupts.”
“No, that’s too simple.” I shook my head, hating how worried Jaxon looked.
“Is it?” he asked. “Because it happens all the time. We always knew the same thing could happen to me too. That’s why Lisa made sure I thought about you before I did anything. And that’s why you should stay here, where I need you to be.”
He really played that last bit up.
Gods, I loved this male.
“I can’t.” One day, I’d make it up to him. I swore it. “Calla is still there. And I saw—or dreamed—Gram warning me. It’s not just my sisters I need to protect. I know Sarah spoke with her Alpha, but she’s hiding something from him.”
I took a breath, ready to argue my point further even as my wolf whined, begging me to stay a little longer.
Jaxon pressed his lips to my forehead in a gentle kiss. “I know.”
“And another thing…Wait.” I pushed back so I could look at him. “You know what?”
“I know you’re a kickass wolf-witch and you need to see this through to prove something to yourself, but can you just let me pretend that I have some say when it comes to protecting my mate?” He shrugged with one shoulder. “Figured I’d ask, because my beast is riding me hard and wants you to stay.”
Tell him his wolf is the only other rational being here.
I smiled. “Say that again.”
“My wolf part or begging you to stay?” he asked.
“The part where you called me your mate.” I looped my arms around his neck, holding him closer to me, and silently promising I’d do whatever it took to make this up to him for the rest of my life.
*
Somehow, I made it out of Jaxon’s tent before the sun had fully risen. Not that he let me go. His massive black wolf stalked me through the early gray dawn, past the quiet claps from Gentry’s and the twins’ tents that made my cheeks flush bright red.
Jaxon’s wolf growled a bit, but he followed me to the training field where I stopped to scratch his big jaw.
“Let Alpha Kera know about the blood magic,” I said. “Tell her I’ll find proof, and then we’ll get out of here.”
His wolf whined and I wished we’d sealed our bond so we could speak telepathically, but we’d have the rest of forever to figure it out.
I’d make sure of it.
“I’ll find a way to come see you at the trials today,” I swore to him.
Now that I knew what we were to each other, there was no denying the ache I’d felt in my chest my entire life.
No wonder I always wanted to be close to him.
Being near him made me feel like me. Brave, and strong, and powerful again.
Jaxon’s wolf pawed at the ground, giving me a chance to change my mind and come with him.
She won’t, my wolf grumbled. Stubborn human.
“Go now before you get me caught.” I kissed his big furry snout.
With one last whine, he bounded back the way we came, and I steeled myself for what was coming next.
I moved fast, creeping over the valley ridge and dipping into the shadows of the war tents, where nothing much moved except for a warlock or two on patrol. The first rays of sun were barely breaking the horizon when I found my tent.
That’s when I heard the screams.