Chapter Seventeen
Sawyer
Sawyer didn’t sleep much that night. He was too on edge about everything.
From Clay coming downstairs to assault Benji like the bastard did to so many others when Sawyer wasn’t looking.
To the information he found about Benji’s predicament.
To him not telling him about what he found.
To him not telling him anything about why he was doing what he was doing.
Sawyer’s mind was in shambles and he didn’t know how he was going to sort through it all.
He was obviously going to tell Benji about what he found.
He just needed a better time for it. When he was less… ill.
Throughout the night when he would randomly wake back up, he would check the other's temperature and there was some slight improvement in it. The dichotomy of him being both warm and cold was still quite interesting. He imagined it would take some time for them to both really go down though. He doubted one dose of the medication would help so soon anyway. If it did at all. Sawyer didn’t know what medications were good for what, obviously.
“Hot,” Benji replied, just as quietly, “and cold. But better than earlier.”
“Good.”
There was a pause before the other spoke again. “Why are we whispering?”
Sawyer shrugged. “I don’t know,” he turned his head to look at him, “Do you mind if we do it?”
Benji met his gaze. “No.”
“Okay.”
The two gazed into each other's eyes for a while longer before Sawyer turned his head straight forward again. He could feel Benji still looking at him, which was fine. He didn’t mind. Not one bit. “I don’t want to do this anymore,” he admitted, a bit surprised by his own words.
“Do what exactly?”
“Everything. This,” his hand waved at the area around them. “I hate it. I hate it so much.”
“Then why do you do it?”
Sawyer frowned a bit, swallowing. It sounded so loud to him but it was probably nothing to Benji.
His heart was pounding in his ears. He had never spoken of his hatred for his job, for what was left of his family.
And while it might seem obvious to him, they had no idea.
They just thought he was a whiny kid, even if he was going to be thirty years old in just a few months.
“It’s just…what I’m supposed to do. My parents, they started this whole operation.
But when they were around, it wasn’t like this.
It wasn’t this. They had the jobs they were assigned to do and they did them.
They weren’t the most savory of jobs, but it wasn’t kidnapping innocent people who were also just doing their jobs and torturing them to death because something didn’t go their way. ”
“What happened to them?”
“They died when I was a kid. Dad died on an assignment. Mom killed herself about a year later.”
“So who is that guy then? The main one.”
“My uncle, Milo.”
He saw Benji nod just a bit from the corner of his eye. “I’m sorry about your parents.”
“It’s okay,” he said, “I was nine when my mom died. It’s a weird age.
I remember things from when I was a kid but barely.
I remember what they looked like. And I remember some random things we did, like…
a vacation or two. But I don’t remember anything else really,” he looked back at Benji, “So I don’t really think about them too much.
Not anymore. I don’t think I would like them much, to be honest.”
“Still sucks though. I don’t know what I’d do without my family. They’re…everything to me.”
That statement made his stomach drop and he immediately turned his head so he wasn’t looking at Benji anymore. The fact that he knew that father was the one who got him into the situation he was in and Benji had no idea. It was going to crush him. Was it better to tell him now or wait?
Was there even a ‘better’ situation?
Probably not.
“Listen, Benji…” Sawyer said, trying to broach the topic that was at hand. It wasn’t fair to keep it to himself. “I-I did some…digging around when I went upstairs. When you told me you weren’t Andi.”
Benji’s brows furrowed. “Okay…?”
He released a breath. Why was it so hard to say? “I found some correspondence between Milo and a Matthew. Milo first asked about a job from John Raymond.”
His eyes shifted back and forth, clearly trying to find some sort of connection. “I don’t know anything about John Raymond. But my dad’s name is Matthew.”
“Well, apparently, Matthew was supposed to wire some funds from John to my uncle but the funds never made it there.”
Benji sat up, quicker than he likely intended. He swayed a bit from it and placed his hand against his forehead, but proceeded to stay put. “What? What do you mean?”
“I don’t know. That’s what Milo said and M-Matthew said that he took the job but didn’t reroute the wire.”
“Yeah, of course he didn’t. He doesn’t know how to do that.”
Sawyer sat up. “Well, a couple weeks later, he reached out to my uncle and he said that it was his son Andi that rerouted the funds.”
“Bull fucking shit,” Benji said but it was more a laugh, “There’s no way he said that. You just…found the wrong information.”
“I don’t think so. I found the files under encryption and the files were named AM. Andi Madison, right?”
He blinked a few times and shrugged, “I-I…mean yeah, probably but that–”
“All adds up?”
All at once, he could see a myriad of emotions go by the man’s face. Hurt, confusion, betrayal, anger, sadness, frustration… the list went on and on. “He said my son?” Benji sounded like a lost child at that moment. His voice was so soft and so incredibly hurt.
Sawyer chewed on his bottom lip and nodded his head. “Yeah, he did.”
He wiped at his eyes so quickly that Sawyer barely noticed it. “But…Andi didn’t do it. She wouldn’t do that.”
“I don’t know about that. I just know what I read.”
“Andi wouldn’t do that!” Benji spat. “She wouldn’t. She’s my best fucking friend. I know everything she does. She never mentioned anything like that.”
“Well, would she tell you about something like that?”
“No, because there’s nothing to tell. She didn’t do it. My dad is probably just…mistaken or something. I-I don’t know.”
“Why would he say my son?”
He could see Benji swallow before he dropped his gaze to look down at the dirty mattress.
“He’s…been weird with me for awhile now,” he sighed and Sawyer’s brow arched.
“I really fucked up a mission he assigned me. It was my first solo one and I just…failed. Spectacularly. Everything that could have gone wrong, did. And he’s just…
never trusted me much since then. And Andi, I mean, she can do no wrong in his eyes.
He was probably just…watching out for her. ”
“But why would he have to look out for her if she didn’t do anything?”
“I don’t know, Sawyer!” A couple tears dripped from the corners of Benji’s eyes which just led him to placing his face in his hands.
Sawyer had no idea what to do. He just knew that he felt absolutely terrible for dropping such a bomb on Benji after everything else he had to endure. “Benji… I’m sorry.”
He didn’t say anything. He just laid back down and turned his back towards Sawyer.
Which was expected. What else could he do?
He supposed that he could run but he didn’t think he was well enough for that.
He about fell over when he sat up too quickly.
There was no way he could escape like that.
Sawyer sighed and folded his hands in his lap, a bit awkwardly.
That was until he heard footsteps above them.
Loud ones. They were moving quickly. Sawyer immediately jumped into action and pulled himself over Benji so that he could look into his eyes.
“I know you’re upset right now. I know and I’m sorry.
I’m so sorry. But you have to pretend with me right now, okay?
You’re still Andi. And you’re still delusional.
” Sawyer’s heart was about to beat out of his chest. He had been thinking about when Milo was going to find Benji untied in the basement and what he was going to do to justify it.
It seemed that time was coming quicker than expected.
“Benji, please. Just nod if you will play along. It’s for your own good.” He didn’t say anything, but he did nod, just like Sawyer asked. “Thank you.” He sighed and stood up the moment he heard the lock to the basement open.