26. Rip
Chapter 26
Rip
“ W e should go. We’ll see you in the morning, King Alpha,” Maximus says, but I barely hear him, far too focused on Hettie’s abrupt departure. Maximus and Grant bow their heads in respect and file out the door, leaving Thorne and me alone.
I don’t dare look over at my second, knowing I will only see disappointment written across his face. It will mirror my own. I truly believed inviting Hettie to the meeting would be in good faith. This should have showcased our unity and leadership, but I fear we only succeeded in showing a divided front.
“That could have gone better,” Thorne says unhelpfully.
I perch on the edge of my desk, crossing my arms over my chest, and scowl. “You don’t say?” My voice drips with sarcasm. “You saw how it went. Now two commanders of our guard think we are an incompetent team.”
Thorne rolls his eyes. “Hardly. What they saw was two passionate people disagreeing over the safety of our pack. These are unprecedented times, Rip. Tensions run high, even between our King Alpha and his Luna. It’s normal. ”
“You call that normal?” I’m convinced Thorne wasn’t in the same room as us. That or he’s simply trying to be obtuse just to piss me off.
“Yeah, I do. There are learning curves in all new relationships. I imagine especially between a human woman and the King Alpha. You both are still learning how the other operates. May I offer advice?” He folds his hands into his lap.
“Yeah.”
“Stop seeing Hettie as a meek omega. You didn’t marry a submissive omega who will go along with your every wish. You married an opinionated human who has adapted shockingly well to pack life. Give her some credit.”
“I take it back. I don’t give a shit about your advice,” I growl, not liking the implication that I treat my mate with less respect than what she deserves.
But, maybe…
Thorne laughs softly. “My apologies then. What do I, a happily mated wolf, know about relationships anyway?”
“Giving you my blessing to mate my cousin was the worst decision I’ve made thus far,” I say with no real ire behind my words. Because as much as I don’t want to hear what Thorne is saying, I can’t deny that he is making me second-guess every interaction I’ve had with Hettie.
Not the physical moments. Those I’ll never second-guess. Our bodies fit perfectly together, and there’s no thinking about what the other one wants. We just know. And we are damn good at it.
But this? Making decisions for the pack? I have been operating as a single unit for so long, I’ve never learned how to answer and discuss with another person who holds the same amount of weight as me in the pack.
“I’m not saying your idea is wrong, and hers is right,” Thorne says. “I’m saying it would be best for the pack and your relationship to find a middle ground.”
This feels like a test in my relationship, and I’ve failed. Thorne gets up and affectionately claps me on the shoulder. “You’re doing good, Alpha. You just don’t have to carry the weight of the pack alone. Let Hettie help. She clearly wants to.”
Thorne drops his hand and walks to the door. “Off to find my mate. Maybe you should do the same.” He then leaves, and I’m alone once again.
Thorne has given me a lot to think about. I’m not too proud to admit to my stubbornness and take advice from those I respect. I can’t change overnight though. It will take time for me to lean completely on another person, but I can try.
For Hettie.
Hell, for me . There’s only so much I can take on without succumbing to the darkness that lingers just out of reach.
Fatigue sets in, and I know it’s time to quit stalling. I push myself off the desk and leave my office. Hettie’s scent still lingers in the air, the faint smell of lavender and honey. Just the smell of her has my body hard, eager to get my mate back in my arms. I’ll apologize if that’s what she wants. Or maybe I’ll fuck my apology into her.
I taste her anger like vinegar on my tongue. I try to push my need for her and remorse for what I did through the bond, but she closes her mind to me. I didn’t even know she knew how to do that.
I growl low in my chest as my cock strains painfully against my pants. I take the stairs two at a time and all but jog down the hallway to our bedroom door.
I hear sloshing water. Is she in the tub? Without me?
Of course she is. She’s pissed at me .
I grab the doorknob and try to turn it, but it doesn’t budge. She locked me out. Anger and desire battle within me. How dare she lock me out of my room. I could kick the door in and spank her ass red for locking me out…but that isn’t what Hettie needs right now.
She needs…not me.
And that fucking hurts.
It’s my fault, though.
Water sloshes again, and an image of Hettie naked in the tub plays through my mind. Her big tits with pointed nipples. The sweet cunt I want to bury my face in each time I see her. And that ass…so fucking perfect. I haven’t taken her there yet, but I will.
I don’t know why I’m punishing myself. I’m so damn hard, all my rational thinking leaves me as I unzip my jeans, pulling out my aching cock. I’m very aware I’m in a hallway where anyone could walk by and see me jacking off by my bedroom door, but I’m too gone to care.
What is she doing in there? Touching herself? Playing with that little clit I love to tease? I grip my cock harder around the base and drag my hand up with a groan. It’s not the same, not nearly enough, but this is my penance.
My balls are heavy, desperate for release. I jerk my cock again and stroke it just how I like it. A little pain. A lot of pleasure. I picture Hettie on her knees in front of me, mouth open, her tits heaving as she comes down from her orgasm.
I imagine coming all over her sexy face, marking every inch of her body. The way we would moan together, sated in our release.
My breath hitches, and soon I’m coming. But instead of painting my mate, I paint the door. Despite the circumstances, I can’t hide my smirk. I couldn’t physically mark her like I wanted to, but I still claimed her in a different way. This room and all who occupy it are mine.
For now and until my last breath.
I tuck myself back into my pants, doing my best to slow my rapidly beating heart. It takes all my strength to turn away from the door and walk back down the dimly lit hallway.
She wants to be left alone. So I leave her alone.
But only for tonight.
Tomorrow, Hettie is mine.