Chapter 6
Nina went back inside after Finch and Ally left. That hug had felt good. She told herself it would have felt good if anyone had given it to her. But from the angry and wounded Finch McAllister, it had somehow been worth so much more.
After breaking several speed limits, Nina had reached the rest home yesterday. She’d then sat at her mother’s bedside, holding her hand, singing and talking to her until she drew in a last shaky breath in the early hours of this morning.
She didn’t know how long she sat there holding those cold, lifeless fingers, numb with grief, until a nurse had told her it was time to leave.
After kissing her cheek one last time, Nina had rested her head briefly on her mother’s chest, a place she had known so well over the years, and thanked her for being the wonderful mother who she loved very much.
She didn’t remember the drive back to Lyntacky, but had reached her home safely. She’d fed Mabel, washed, and climbed into bed. Nina had then cried until exhaustion had taken over and she’d slept.
This morning she’d woken with tired eyes and a heavy heart.
Nina headed back into the kitchen with her now empty mug to put on more coffee, as today was likely a four-cup day. After filling Mabel’s empty bowl, Nina went to her swing chair and wrapped her arms around her knees, staring out the window.
Life in Lyntacky went on around her. People were heading off to work or dropping kids at school. Life would be normal for some today. But not her. It wouldn’t be normal for a while.
Nina had been alone a lot in her life. Yes, she had friends who she now considered family, but only her mother was a blood relation, and just sometimes that got to her.
It was strange not knowing if she had inherited her small ears and barking laugh from her father, or some other member of his family.
Normally, it didn’t bother her too much. Today it did.
As she looked around the little home she was so proud of, with its eclectic mix of color and style, it didn’t make her happy like it usually did.
Her phone rang then. Nina looked at the caller ID and found JD’s name there.
“Hey, JD.”
“I’m so sorry, Nina. I just heard about your mom,” he said.
“Who told you?” Because she’d told no one but Finch, and she was pretty sure he wouldn’t have spoken to anyone.
“Ally called me.”
Did Finch tell Ally, who then called JD? That thought made her feel a little warmer inside.
“I’m okay, JD.”
“No, you’re not, so don’t act tough. Your mother just died, and that hurts and will for a long time until the grief softens, so stop acting like you’re okay like you always do.”
She sniffed at his words because he was right. It felt like she had a deep cut inside her and someone was pouring lemon juice over it.
“Take a few days or however long you need. We can make things work and cover you. I’ve always wanted to do Dee Heckler’s eyebrows, and now I may get that chance.”
Nina snorted at his words. “I won’t need long. I just need to sort—”
“Nina, shut up and do as I tell you. Take as long as you want.”
“Thanks, JD, but honestly I think I’m going to need the distraction of work.”
“Okay, but at least take a couple of days, and if you want help organizing anything, I’m good at that, too, so ask me.”
“I will.”
“Now my wife wants to talk to you, and as Connor only gave us a few hours’ sleep, and she doesn’t cope as well as I do with less than eight, maybe listen to what she has to say and don’t argue back.”
Nina couldn’t quite hear what Zoe said to him, and then she was on the phone.
“Nina, I’m so sorry about your mom. I can come over now if you want?”
“Thanks, Zoe, and honestly, I have to run some errands this morning, so I’m going to be busy. I have to get back to the home at some stage, too, and collect Mom’s things.”
“You can’t do that alone!”
Nina winced at the tone. “Okay, I won’t, then. I’ll take someone with me.”
“You’re lying to me, aren’t you, Nina? And after JD told you not to annoy me too.”
“Zoe—”
“It doesn’t make you weak to ask for help.”
“I know that, and I will if I need it. Now go and get some sleep, and thank you for the phone call.”
“I’m really sorry, Nina, I’ll hug you next time I see you,” Zoe said.
“I just got a hug….” Her words fell away as she realized what she was saying.
“From whom?”
“What?” Nina asked, wondering why she hadn’t kept her mouth shut, but then, if she was going to be off-balance, today would be the day.
“Who hugged you?” Zoe demanded.
“Gotta go. There’s another call coming through,” she lied. She cut the call before her friend could ask any more questions.
She’d created her own family here in Lyntacky, and they’d all loved her mom too. It was important at times like this to remember that.
Nina showered and dressed, pulling on gray trousers and teaming them with a thick black sweater. She took time on her makeup until she looked less like a ghost and more like the Nina who worked at The Gnat.
Leaving Mabel basking in the late morning sun in her bed by the window, oblivious to her owner’s turmoil like the furry freeloader she was, Nina headed to her car and drove to the Circle Left. She wanted to tell Nancy personally about her mother.
Everyone in Lyntacky would know she’d died by day’s end, and then Nina would get flowers and casseroles arriving on her doorstep, as that was their way of showing they cared for anyone who needed it.
Pulling up in front of Circle Left, her eyes settled on the for-sale sign.
It hurt more seeing it today. This place had been something solid and reliable in her life, and that was changing.
With the loss of her mother and soon Nancy and Hank, the ground under her feet felt like it was suddenly unsteady.
Walking inside, she found Sergio, the chef, in the dining area. The man cooked the best breakfast omelets she’d ever eaten, drizzling them with a sauce to make your mouth feel like it was doing the tango.
“Hey, Nina. Nancy and Hank are upstairs.”
“Thanks, Sergio.”
She took the stairs up and found them in the storage room off the narrow hallway that held linen and other supplies. Nancy saw her first, and the welcoming smile fell from her lips as she studied Nina’s face.
“She’s gone, Nancy,” Nina said, walking into her arms.
They cried together then. Hank’s arms wrapped around them both and stayed there until they were done. Only then did they ease apart.
“Come on, let’s go downstairs and sit. I’ll make us some coffee,” Hank said.
“Go and get the envelope first, Hank,” Nancy said.
“What envelope?” Nina asked.
“Come.” Nancy took her hand instead of explaining and led Nina back downstairs. Soon they were seated at a table in the bar. No one else was in the room at this hour, so they had privacy.
“I was with Mom at the end,” Nina said.
“Shirley would have known you were there. I’m sure of it,” Nancy said.
Nina liked that thought, even if she doubted her mother had been aware of anything.
Hank reappeared with a white envelope in his hand, which he handed to his wife.
“I need to give you this, Nina. Your mom asked me to hold on to it when she was first diagnosed. She said I wasn’t to hand it over until… well. Until now.”
“What is it?”
“She never told me what was in it.” Nancy passed it to Nina. “She just said it was for you and that it was important.”
Nina stared at it, not sure why she felt like something was about to knock her life off its axis even further than her mother’s death had. “Do you have any idea—”
“None, honey. I asked her once, years ago, if everything was all right, because sometimes she looked so sad. Shirley just said there were things in her past she’d told no one about, and that they were better left there. I didn’t push. Your mom didn’t like being pushed.”
Hank reached over and gave Nina’s shoulder a squeeze. “Whatever is in that letter, we’re right here if you need us.”
“I-I can’t take all this in,” Nina whispered, turning the envelope over in her hands. Her mother had died only yesterday, and already there was something more waiting for her. Something Nancy had kept hidden for years.
“Go on and read it,” Hank said gently. “We’ll give you some space, but we’ll be close by.”
Nina opened the envelope and took out the paper with unsteady fingers as Hank and Nancy retreated to the kitchen.
If you’re reading this, my darling girl, then I have left you.
I want you to know that I loved you from the minute you were born and am so proud of the beautiful and accomplished young lady you’ve become, and I’m so sorry I won’t be there to see any children you have and meet your future partner, but considering my diagnosis I know it’s unlikely.
That cut deep. Not having her mother around as she herself navigated motherhood would be hard, if that day ever came. She kept reading.
But there are people close who love you as much as I did, my darling. Hold onto them now.
I need to apologize, too, Nina. I didn’t tell you the truth about your father, or about yourself, because I was a coward. Because I didn’t know how to answer the questions you would ask. But know this—I did what I did to keep you safe.
Your name wasn’t Nina Winters when you were born. You were born Christina Falcon. Winters was your grandmother’s maiden name, and I changed it legally after I ran away.
Nina’s hands went still. She read the sentence again, then a third time, as though it might rearrange itself into something that made sense. Ran from what?
Your father’s name is Dale Falcon, and he is in prison. It’s my hope he stays there until he draws his last breath, but there may come a day he gets out and looks for you. Only one person in Lyntacky knows your real name, and you must never use it, Nina. You will stay safe if you don’t.
This couldn’t be true—could it?
It was important that you lived a normal life, and I didn’t want you looking over your shoulder, wondering about your father, if you knew what he was capable of.
Had that been the case for her mother? Nina wondered. Had she spent every day of her life afraid he’d get out and find them? Just how bad was he?
Don’t go looking for that man, Nina. Her mother had underlined the words.
I fell in love with a young, handsome man who turned out to be nothing like I thought he was, but I didn’t realize that until the end, and then it was too late.
They took him away one night, and I was suddenly alone with you, and two choices.
Stay, which he believed I would do, or run.
I ran because I couldn’t be sure we’d be safe if I stayed.
I truly thought we loved each other once, Nina. You must always believe that. And I will forever be grateful that he gave me you, but what he did was not something I could ever forgive.
Sheriff Dans is the only other person who knows the truth of it, all of it, more than I could ever bring myself to write in this letter.
Talk to him now, Nina. He can tell you what you need to know, and he has something I asked him to give you when the time came.
It’s all for you. I want you to follow your dreams with it.
Stay here in Lyntacky, my darling girl, where people will love and protect you always. Know that I love you very much.
Mom xx
Nina sat very still for a long moment, the paper trembling in her hands, the name Dale Falcon sitting in her chest like a stone. Her name had once been Christina Falcon.