FIVE #2
When he’d walked out of sight, she took off her shoes and stockings and stepped into the river.
The water swirled around her and she squished her toes down into the muddy bottom.
It wasn’t very ladylike, but she immediately felt cooler from head to toe.
She rolled up her sleeves and splashed water on her arms, some dripping down onto her dress.
A breeze came up and she relished the wind on her damp face. It was calm here. With the sound of the water flowing and watching a white heron fly across the river, it was hard to believe she was having to flee destruction.
She climbed out of the river and lay back against the tree, waiting. As much as she wanted to close her eyes, she needed to stay alert. She knew nothing of the army’s whereabouts other than the brief exchange they had back at the cabin.
A crunch of twigs announced Henry’s return. He held several large clusters of wild muscadine grapes. “I came across a vine. It’s not much for supper, but it’ll have to do. I don’t want to risk smoke from a fire tonight. Not until we put a little more distance between us.”
They silently feasted. The inside was juicy and sweet. The taste brought up so many memories of scavenging for them with her brothers. Only Mama abstained from eating them, as there really wasn’t a graceful way to do it with the seeds.
She would try to instruct Maggie not to eat them, but Papa would gently remind her that it was a delicacy.
“Why would God grow the vine if we aren’t to eat it?” Papa asked Mama.
Mama would retort, “He grew the forbidden fruit in the garden, did He not?”
Papa rolled his eyes. “Clara, when the child is courting, she won’t go around spitting grapes. But let her enjoy a late summer treat while she’s young.”
Mollified, Mama would return to her sewing while Maggie grinned, mouth filled with the sweet grapes. Papa ruffled her hair and winked.
Of course, all of this was before this bloody war when Papa got himself and both of his sons killed.
“Is something wrong? Did you eat a sour one?” Henry worried. He must’ve been watching her face again.
“No. I was just thinking of something.” Eager to change the subject, she asked, “Where are you taking us? We left in such a hurry, I didn’t think to ask.”
“North. Once Sherman reaches Charleston, there’s no telling where he’ll go next.”
“Well, can’t you find out? Aren’t you an officer?” The thought of going north unnerved her.
“I’m not under General Sherman. There’s talk of this war being close to the end. Once the Union gained control of the Mississippi River, it split the South in half. Sherman’s mission is to further weaken it. Or to destroy it completely.”
Maggie paled. Little information had reached her and Mama in their final weeks together. She didn’t realize the state of the war. “And then?”
“The confederacy will surrender, I suppose. This country will look very differently than it has in the past.”
“You don’t sound like you think that’s a bad thing.” There was a tone of accusation in her voice.
“I think the end of the war will end slavery. But do I agree that an entire half of our nation should be destroyed to win the war or to end evil we fight with evil? No, I don’t.”
“My family didn’t own slaves. Papa only wanted to keep more power in the hands of the state.” Shocking herself, she realized she had just defended her father when she had sworn she wouldn’t forgive him abandoning the family.
“Where did your father fight?”
“Sumter.” She narrowed her eyes and dared him to say he was there, on the other side, fighting against her father.
“No. I wasn’t there, before you ask.”
Could he read her mind?
Maggie was quick to respond.“You might not’ve been there, but you were somewhere killing another’s father, brother, son, or husband.” Indignation raised her chin.
Quickly standing, he raked his hand through his hair. Calmness had been wiped from his face. His brows were set firmly, but there was hurt in his eyes. “You’re right. Every time I have killed, it’s taken someone who was loved by another out of this world. But I’ve never done it willingly.”
She must’ve shown her confusion because his voice deepened.
“Any men that I’ve commanded can testify that I don’t send them into battle lightly.
Each is trained to defend themselves, but also taught the sanctity of human life.
They have orders to take prisoners when they can and only to kill when there is no other way.
If I could end this war today, I would. Maggie, I’m truly sorry for all that you have suffered in this war.
You’ve lost family, just as I have. But just as you are not responsible for their deaths, neither am I for your family’s. ”
Her chin wobbled, anger ebbing away. “You can’t know that. You’re on the opposite side… Who would know if you’d been the one to face Hugh… or Joel… or any of them? You say that you only take life when you must, but that still doesn’t mean that you didn’t kill them.”
It was the first time she’d mentioned her brothers, but Henry didn’t look surprised. There’d been a lot of time spent in the cabin. Probably enough to notice several pairs of farm boots left, waiting for owners who would never come home.
He sighed and sounded as though he’d lived a thousand years.
“And I pray to God it wasn’t me. But we’ll never know, will we?
If we cling to anger and sadness, it’ll destroy us.
There’s nothing I can say or do to change the past. In this war, everyone must choose a side.
If you don’t, you’ll be pulled one way or another.
When I look at you, I don’t see my sworn enemy.
I see a child of God that’s been badly hurt.
When I’m called to fight, there’s nothing I can do to stop the battle.
I can only cling to the hope and promise of God. ”
Stunned by his speech, she remained still, mouth open.
He truly believed it. The depths of his conscience had just been poured out for her to witness.
Exhaling, she dropped her chin down. “You seem to be forgetting that I don’t believe in God.
Believe what you want to, but it doesn’t change anything to me…
Our differences run blood deep. We can never be friends. ”
Something tightened in his cheek. “Whether you choose to acknowledge Him or not, He’s still there.
You’ve lost one father, but you have another— a Heavenly Father.
And He loves you. Don’t throw it all away.
” He glanced away.“We don’t have to be friends.
But like it or not, I made a promise to myself to make sure you’re safe.
So, until that happens, you’re stuck with me. ”