Chapter 5
The whole day, the messages keep coming. A constant stream of notifications. Dinging. Buzzing. Little red dots. North is more excited than I am. He reads them aloud in funny voices, cackling with laughter.
Hey cutie :)
Quiet type huh? I can make you loud
Hi Gavin!
That pic is doing things to me
U’re hot. Wanna fuck?
Omg hiiii
I like quiet guys. They're always the freakiest.
Are you really 19? You look older. In a good way
Handle it? Challenge accepted
Hey! Love your profile. What do you draw?
You had me at big surprise
Sit on my face?
My cheeks are permanently flushed. I don’t know how to respond to any of them. What do you even say to “Sit on my face?” Thank you for the offer? I’d prefer a chair?
“You have to be more proactive, Gav,” North says for the tenth time. He’s lying on my bed, socks off, bare feet propped up against the wall, scrolling through the endless stream of interest. “These girls are throwing themselves at you. All you have to do is catch.”
I never expected to be in this position. To be the one being chased. It’s North’s world. Not mine.
But I have to admit, all this attention…
it’s doing something to me. I never thought this was something I could have.
That I could be the object of desire. Too bad none of it matters.
Because the only person I want a message from is lying on my bed right now, scrolling through my matches with his bare feet on the wall. Telling me to reply to strangers.
“I’m not very good at catching,” I mumble.
“Practice makes perfect.” He sits up straight, suddenly still. His thumb stops scrolling. His eyes go wide.
“What?” I say.
He doesn’t answer. He’s staring at the screen, his mouth hanging open. “No way.” His voice is barely a whisper. “No fucking way.”
“What, North? You’re freaking me out. What is it?”
He shoves the phone in my face. “You got a message from Staci McPherson.”
I squint at the screen. There it is. Her profile picture. Blonde hair, big smile, cheerleading uniform. And underneath:
Gavin?? I’ve seen you around campus like a million times but we’ve never actually talked. Your profile is… a lot. Surprise is an understatement :)
“And then they say girls aren’t as visual as guys,” North says, cackling. “What did I tell you? What. Did. I. Tell. You?”
I’m speechless. Staci McPherson. The girl whose ass is a work of art, according to North. The girl I’ve always thought of as way out of my league. She knows who I am. She messaged me. Because of a picture of my dick.
And I know I should be thrilled. Ecstatic. This is everything North has been pushing for. The grand prize. The trophy. The touchdown dance in the end zone. But all I feel is this cold dread. A sinking weight in my stomach.
North grabs me by the shoulders and shakes me. “Dude. Snap out of it. This is huge. You have to respond. Now.”
“What do I say?”
“Tell her you know her, too. That you’d love to meet up. Tonight.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea. We still have a lot of boxes to unpack.”
“Boxes? You can’t be serious right now.” North’s eyebrows almost touch his hairline. “This is Staci. Fucking. McPherson. You don’t unpack boxes. You get in the shower. You make yourself smell like a man who is about to have the best night of his life.”
I open my mouth to argue, but he’s already grabbed my phone and is typing a reply. His thumbs move faster than mine ever could.
The Bangr notifications keep dinging. It’s surreal. It’s like I’m in somebody else’s life. A life I don’t know the rules for. I feel like an impostor. A fraud. This isn’t me. The guy in that picture, the guy these girls want… that guy isn’t me.
“I don’t think I can do this, North.”
“Yes, you can. I’ll help you.”
“Help me how?”
“Okay.” He shuffles a bit closer, a glint in his eye.
He leans in, his arm going around my shoulder, and I immediately tense up.
He doesn’t seem to notice. “We’ll have a dry run.
Roleplay. I’ll be Staci.” He pitches his voice higher, making it breathy and feminine.
“‘Oh, Gavin, I’ve seen you around campus. You always look so… mysterious.’”
“North, no.”
“‘That picture on Bangr… it really surprised me. In a good way.’” He jabs me in the ribs with his elbow. “Your turn.”
“I’m not doing this.”
“Come on. It’s for a good cause.” His arm is still around me. His breath is warm on my ear. He smells so good. “I’m waiting.”
“I think I want you,” I blurt out.
“Yes! See? That’s the spirit.” He drops right back into the breathy Staci voice. “‘I think I want you too, Gavin. I’ve always had a thing for quiet guys.’”
“I don’t know what’s coming over me, but ever since yesterday, I’ve had this…
this feeling. Like something woke up inside me.
Maybe it’s been there longer than I realized, but now I can’t stop thinking about it.
About you. Your body. The way you smell.
The way you look at me when you think I’m not paying attention. ”
“Okay, that’s a little intense for an opener, but I like the honesty angle. Girls eat that up.” He squeezes my shoulder. “‘What kind of feeling, Gavin? Tell me.’”
“Like I want to kiss you. Like I want you to suck my dick.”
“Whoa. Okay, tiger. That’s… forward. I don’t think you lead with that.”
“And I wanna suck yours.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s not how you would phrase that to a woman.”
I’m unbuttoning my jeans now. I don’t know why. I can’t stop myself. North’s arm is still around my shoulders, but he’s gone quiet. The breathy Staci impression is gone. I can feel the corded muscles in his arm tense against my neck.
“What are you doing, Gav?”
I pull my cock out. Hard as fuck. Then I take my best friend’s free hand and guide it toward me.
“Touch me, North. I want you to touch me.”