Chapter 21
Shawna
Ishatter for what has to be the hundredth time, but it is in the midst of it, as I watch Jak’s eyes roll back as he teeters forward and then falls limply to the floor, that I know we have made a horrible mistake somewhere.
I disentangle myself from his wings to climb higher along his torso so that I can lean over him and inspect him worriedly.
“Jak? Jak!” I cry, and I grip his shoulders in my hands, giving him a hard shake that doesn’t rouse him much beyond a weak blink of his eyes. “Fuck! Fuck!” I shout, and I sob as I stumble to my feet.
I have no idea what to do. I pace back and forth for a moment, wringing my hands helplessly as I try to come up with a solution.
“Fuck, Jak, what did you do?” I moan.
The question is ludicrous, of course. He obviously was expelling energy at a rapid rate.
Why didn’t that occur to me before? Why didn’t he think of it?
He’s the damned demon for fuck’s sake. I whirl away and bend as I begin to rapidly snatch my clothes from the floor.
It doesn’t matter now. All that matters is getting him fed somehow.
“I need to get help,” I mumble aloud to myself as I tug on my pants and draw my sweatshirt over my head.
I have no fucking idea how I am going to do this, but that is beside the point. I can’t just let Jak lie there unconscious while he starves into whatever darkness he has descended into.
“Jak, if you live through this, I am going to murder you,” I mutter as I roughly drag on my winter gear and stumble outside.
Of course, it’s snowing again. Not only that, but the wind whips around me violently the moment I step outside, and I am forced to squint against its icy blast. Drawing my scarf up over my nose, I force myself forward through the snow.
How long has it been snowing? The weather had gone ignored while I was indoors with Jak, but clearly it has been ongoing for several hours because the path to the woods has nearly disappeared now as our earlier tracks rapidly fill with snow.
Given that I repeatedly sank nearly knee-deep in the snow earlier, it comes as no surprise that my foot immediately sinks into one of my previous footprints, and the icy ridge scrapes against my leg.
I bite back a curse and yank my leg free, only to repeat the process over and over as I make my way to the edge of the forest.
I hesitate at the boundary, Jak’s warnings going through my head along with a sense of futility because I don’t even know in which direction to travel to find another demon.
Fuck! I turn slowly in place, indecisive as to where I should go.
The hair on my arms prickles as something in the air shifts and a low growling, moaning sound comes from the forest, making me jump and fall back into the snow.
I sink several inches, snow spilling into the opening of my coat and shirt.
I lie there for several breaths, my heart racing fearfully.
I am certain that I am about to die. I brace myself, waiting for some monster or wild beast to descend at my weakest moment.
I am a weak creature, alone in a realm that I don’t belong in.
And it infuriates me. Not because I am exposed and vulnerable in a realm that I never asked to be taken to, but rather because this is now my home and I refuse to be prey a moment longer.
Though the snow weighs me down, I roll onto my belly like a plump seal in all my winter gear and gather my legs beneath me.
I release an embarrassingly loud grunt as I push myself to my feet, but I don’t dwell on it as I stagger and turn slowly, surveying the woods before me.
If it were a mere animal, it would have likely attacked by now.
Whatever it is, it is watching and waiting.
Its actions are intentional and intelligent.
“Hello? Is anyone out there?” I shout into the wind. “Come the fuck out!?”
The snow ripples to my right and I nearly expire from fright when the cold air shimmers and suddenly visibly shifts as a tall demoness in a sheer gown materializes suddenly at my right.
Although there is potential for encountering anything in a demonic realm, I am pretty certain that she is a frost demon.
Not only does she appear to be impervious to cold like Jak is, but she shares the same snowy coloring.
Come to think of it, they may even be related.
Although her horns are smaller and more slender, curving back to just before the middle of her crown, her frosted pink lips are fuller, and her eyes have a more pronounced feline shape than Jak’s, the similarities in their features are impossible to dismiss out of hand.
I clutch the neck of my coat with one hand as I stare at her. “Are... are you related to Jak?” I whisper.
Her head tilts as she considers me, her lips twisting in a cool smile. “So, you are the cause of all of this.”
Is that how it is? I stiffen with indignation as my wariness shifts to anger. “That is hardly fair,” I fire back. I brush my hair out of my face with one hand in frustration. “How do you even know what’s going on, anyway?”
Her thin eyebrows arch at me, her expression not even remotely shifting from its glacial look. It is honestly hard to believe that she even knows how to conjure forth an atmosphere of warmth and merriment at all.
“He is my offspring. I keep tabs on all my young, by one means or another. Of course, I was alerted the moment he fell into starvation. But the better question is, what do you think you are going to accomplish out here?”
I blink at her, momentarily stumped because that’s a good question. Even I do not know what good any of this was going to do him. “I don’t know,” I mumble lamely. “I planned to just walk until I could find help for Jak.”
“Jak? Is that what you call him?” I wait for a look of disdain to pass over her face, but there is nothing but open curiosity as she seems to really look at me now, her eyes narrowing on me slightly. “Interesting. You truly would risk your life out in these woods to save my youngest son?”
Jak’s warnings about the woods return, but I relentlessly shove them away and nod. “Whatever it takes.”
She smiles then, and it is transformative as her pale eyes dance with delight.
She looks young and vibrant rather than formidable and frightening—and I can see a clear glimpse of Jak in her.
I blink at her as my sluggish brain suddenly catches up to everything she said. Wait, did she just call him her son?
She claps her hands together with a shout of laughter that makes me jump a little. “I knew it! If any of my sons could find that special magic, I knew that Jak would be the one.” She gives me another quick once-over, her smile growing wider. “It seems that he got a good one too.”
“You are his mother?” Confused, I just stare at her as I try to reconcile this image of the demoness with the one that Jak mentioned, and the one that I met only moments earlier.
I thought maybe a sister or a cousin... but his mom?
But of course, motherhood wouldn’t affect demonesses the same as us poor mortals.
.. and aging isn’t a worry either. But still. .. his mother?
She dips her head in acknowledgement. “You may call me Elsiana for now if you are not yet comfortable with ‘mother.’”
I can’t even wrap my mind around calling a woman who looks my age ‘mother.” But I am not going to say so when she looks so happy about me, either.
“I don’t get it. You’re happy? Jak says that our relationship breaks all kinds of rules.”
She waves a hand impatiently in the air and turns toward the cabin with a hurried stride.
“Rules shmools. It is just something we say to discourage recklessness and to keep them from getting their hopes up. Otherwise, every male would be out there thinking his next prey would be the one and breaking his heart over and over.”
“And females don’t?” I ask a bit breathlessly as I jog after her.
She shakes her head. “It is not that we do not, but we are more... selective. Breeding is breeding—and because it is interlocked with our feeding, it is a separate matter—but choosing a mate is something we are far more selective about by nature. Females possess an innate understanding when it comes to knowing which male is the right one. I am sure you understand,” she says as she gives me a careless smile over her shoulder.
I’m not sure how to answer that, so I just make a sound of general agreement even though I really have no idea what she is talking about.
Human women haven’t proved to be any better at selecting partners but I’m assuming it’s a demon energy thing that has nothing to do with human mating rituals and selection.
“But mostly, it is because females are far less frequently lured into our world. A healthy female might come once every two or three decades. It is not very encouraging for the poor dears. And then there is Jakfros—the troublemaker among my whelps. If he had an inkling that it was possible, he would have gone straight to human realm and...” she stops abruptly at the door, forcing me to come to a sudden halt to avoid running into her, and spins toward me with a laugh.
“That is it! We will take him to the human realm!”
“I beg your pardon?” I gape at her. “That is your solution? I am better off just going into the woods and finding help,” I reply as I turn away, but she catches my arm effortlessly with one clawed hand and draws me back to her side.
“Do not be silly,” she purrs. “This will work. I can just open the portal somewhere particularly festive, and we select a few individuals to feed him—to compensate for the lack of time to properly cultivate them, you understand?”
“You’re serious.” I stare back at her, but her smile just grows.
“Do you have a better idea? And abandon the thought of going out there to find help. Who is going to just happen to have an extra human on hand on Yule?” She huffs and shakes her head as she steps into the cabin.
The sound of dismay that leaves her upon seeing Jack sprawled in front of the fire is small but painful.
Her lower lip trembles, but she swallows sharply and visibly pushes her worry back with a shake of her head.
“Getting one is hard enough. No one bothers to go for a spare. So, the question is, are you willing to feed my son?” Her eyes glitter at me as she gestures to him.
I look at Jak, and my throat tightens. I haven’t been gone for more than a handful of minutes, but he already looks worse. Somehow, he is gaunter already. How is that even possible?
“Okay,” I whisper. “Let’s do it.” I wince a little as I glance down at the fur that I had draped over his hips before leaving. “I’m going to need help to get him dressed, though.”