Chapter 24
The Vanguard
Harper
“Come on.” Penny grins and drags me toward the coffee shop. Kenz raises her eyebrows when I glance back at her and the other girls. Penny is way too excited about this.
This is the appear like we’re actual friends portion of my day where I spend time with Penny, Nat, Izzy, and Vicky to show the cheerleaders they do have an in with me. I was really hoping the party had been enough, but Jack assured me it wasn’t.
Eli has a plan for Ashley, but we won’t know if she’ll give us the correct information. So having the girls as turncoats is still a priority.
I made sure to bring Kenz because if I’m hanging out with friends, she’s always top on my list. Of course, for a long time, she was the list. But also, I trust her to have my back if things get bad.
We decided on the coffee shop with the notorious bathrooms. I haven’t been back here since that first time when I got dragged to the bathroom twice. My cheeks heat just remembering that study session.
How anyone thought I was still a virgin after that day blows my mind.
Penny stops once we get to the counter. We all order and then grab a table. There are a few other students at different tables. Some studying. Others talking. They all glance our way at least once.
It’s hard to be here without the guys. It’s hard to be anywhere without the guys. They keep my attention on them so I don’t notice the looks others give us as much. But now it’s just me and the girls.
But the whole me and the girls feels really good.
I haven’t had a group of girlfriends since kindergarten.
When I couldn’t be part of clubs or go to sleepovers because of Mom’s schedule, kids stopped inviting me.
There were too many things I didn’t know because you had to be there.
I stopped fitting in and pulled away after my dad left.
Vicky giggles nervously when our eyes meet. This is really awkward.
“So.” I hold my coffee in both hands and look around. “How does this work? Do we pick a topic? Talk about boys? Hair? I’m completely clueless.”
“How’s your art project coming?” Nat sat next to Kenz. Am I jealous they get to work together? I was, but now I have Caden. My cheeks grow warm.
Focus.
“Slowly. It was bad enough when Tanner wouldn’t talk to me about it. But with Caden only being there half the time, we don’t get as much done as I’d like.” I take a sip of my coffee. “We’re behind, but catching up.”
“I just wish she’d be more open to switching partners.” Penny makes a pouty face. She was the first to ask Ms. Sullivan to switch because she got partnered with William Frank.
“Will seems like a nice guy,” I offer.
“He had a crush on Penny in eighth grade.” Izzy stirs her drink. “He made this valentine for her. It was so cheesy and Penny had a huge crush on Zach.”
My eyes widen and my heart races. “You liked Zach Gray?”
Penny’s brown eyes go equally wide. “Ew, no. Zach Murphy. Not Zach Gray.”
My breath releases. I would have had to tell the guys about Zach Gray. Penny could be compromised easily if she used to have a crush on him.
“Anyway, Zach Murphy laughed at Will and so did the rest of the class. So we did too.” Izzy shrugs. “Herd mentality. It’s hard to go against your peers at that age.”
Unless like me, you don’t have any friends to disappoint. The table falls quiet. I really don’t know what to talk about and my guess is they really want to talk about the horsemen. But I really don’t want to talk about my complicated feelings for all of them. Or trade sex stories.
That’s not really who I am, but that’s what I’d do with Kenz. So maybe I’m a little like that, but not with these girls. We still don’t really understand their motive for seeking me out.
I take another sip. “So, has anyone been watching Z High?”
Kenz chuckles. “I will never understand you and your mom’s fascination with zombie shows and movies.”
I flash her a smile.
“I love that show.” Vicky leans in closer. “Are you caught up?”
“Almost.” I smile. “We’ve been working through season two.”
“OMG! I love season two. So much better than The Walking Dead farm season.” Vicky makes a face.
“I know. All those close-ups where you feel the tension of a zombie attack and then... nothing.” I blow out a breath.
“Right?” Vicky grins.
“I think we’ve lost her.” Kenz rolls her eyes. “I love a good zombie movie as much as the next person, but I’d prefer a suspense horror instead. Maybe with a little supernatural thrown in.”
“Now Supernatural is a show I could get behind.” Nat wiggles her eyebrows.
“We could do a movie night.” Penny glances at all of us before her gaze lands on me. “I know you’re pretty busy with the guys, but you should have some evening or afternoon free eventually, right?”
I shrug. “They do take up a lot of my time.”
I don’t mind that the guys take all my time. A movie night with no stress, no guys might actually be fun. It might be nice to be a normal teen girl.
“You have to be careful to maintain friendships when you get into a relationship.” Nat picks off a piece of her croissant and eats it. “We almost didn’t have anyone when we came out of our relationships. It’s so easy to just put off your friends, expecting them to be there when you get dumped.”
I glance at Kenz and she gives me a look that tells me we’re good. But I need to reach out to her more.
“Yeah, and when they cheat on you, it makes it even worse.” Izzy sighs. Jack told me Izzy dated Zach’s older brother until he went away to college. “At least my asshole boyfriend was cheating on me in college. So, once we split, I didn’t have to see him anymore.”
“Just his asshole brother.” Vicky rolls her eyes.
Nat takes Izzy’s hand on the table and squeezes it. “Yeah, not all of us had a fairytale relationship.”
Her gaze falls on Vicky. Vicky shrugs.
“It may have been a nice and mutual breakup, but it was not a fairytale.” Vicky leans back in her chair.
“We’ve all had boyfriends who ended up not being it.” Penny meets my eyes. “Having girlfriends there for you when they don’t last means everything.”
I cock my head a little as I study her. If they’re trying to get in good with the guys then maybe the sob stories are to make me want to hang out with them more and the guys less. I’m not worried about the guys wandering just yet.
But if I stop paying attention to the guys. Stop letting them take me places. Stop being around them all the time. Maybe then they would get bored and stray. Maybe.
But somehow, I don’t think that will be the case. Do I want the freedom to hang out with the girls more? Yes. I want to have relationships outside of the guys. Putting all my thoughts and feelings into them can be dangerous.
I’m less worried about them leaving me, but there’s still that possibility. We’re young. Anything could happen in the next few years. We might not be able to maintain our relationship outside of this town.
Then I’ll need friends to talk to and help me find my feet again. Because if the guys leave me, I don’t know how I’ll pick myself back up. It’s bad enough having your heart broken once, I imagine.
But five times?
“Okay, enough guy talk.” Kenz leans forward and gives me a smirk. “Favorite movie and why?”
“Deadpool.” I don’t even hesitate.
“Really?” Vicky laughs. “I thought you’d go with like classic zombie like Night of the Living Dead or maybe Train to Busan.”
“Nope.” I smirk. “Deadpool has it all. Action, romance, snappy dialogue.”
“I could get behind that.” Nat nods. “I like the Marvel movies and the shows.”
“Have you seen Loki?” Izzy fans herself. “I mean, come on. I get that Thor is the god of thunder and all that. And Chris Hemsworth is drool worthy, but there’s something about Loki down on his knees. Oof.”
“You’ve always had a thing for Tom Hiddleston.” Vicky laughs. “You even dated Trace Masters for a hot minute because he kind of looks like him.”
Izzy throws a napkin at Vicky and looks offended. “Trace was a jackass and didn’t live up to his advertisement.”
I sit back as they all discuss which MCU hero, or villain, they want to date and why they would be a bad or good boyfriend.
I listen but don’t really participate. Just what I need getting back to the guys that I had a huge crush on Iron Man.
I don’t even know what they’d do with that, but it wouldn’t be good.
“Hey there, ladies.” The voice sends chills through me as I lift my gaze to Zach Gray’s.
“What are you doing?” Izzy’s voice has so much anger in it.
He smirks and crosses his arms over his chest. “What? I can’t come over to a table of lovely ladies and say hi?”
He focuses in on me and my chest gets tight. It’s hard to breathe. My hands shake on my coffee. He didn’t get to me in that closet, but at the same time, he did. Right now, I feel like I’m back there. Unable to move or escape.
Kenz stands behind my chair and puts her hands on my shoulders. “Maybe because you’re an asshole. Go away, Zach.”
His gaze lifts to hers and I’m free. I suck in a breath, but the nausea and trembling remain.
“And who are you? Her guard dog?” One blond eyebrow raises.
“If need be.” Kenz squeezes my shoulder and I draw from her strength.
Zach chuckles and his gaze returns to me, holding me in place. “Always so protected, darling.”
I want to have a witty retort, but my throat feels like it’s stuffed with cotton. I can’t say anything or move.
“Don’t worry. We’ll have our time.” He winks at me before he moves away to another table where Sidney sits and studies us.
I straighten. Fuck. I let too much slip. Even by not saying a word. They know he gets to me.
“Do you want to go?” Penny takes my trembling hand and holds it.
I shake my head, inhaling a deep breath. “No. If we leave, they win.”
Kenz squeezes my shoulders one more time before returning to her seat. She glares over at Zach before facing the table. “There’s got to be a way to get that guy to back off.”
Izzy clears her throat and leans forward. “When I was dating Eric, Zach creeped the fuck out of me.”
“How?” I drink some more coffee, trying to ignore the buzzing feeling of having my predator in my peripheral vision. I’m tempted to ask someone to switch places so I can keep my eyes on him, but at the same time, that gives him too much power.
“He caught us having sex.” Izzy glances over at Zach. “And instead of leaving, he’d watch and Eric wouldn’t stop even if I wanted to. Eric would get a little rougher and—”
Nat takes Izzy’s hand and squeezes it for support. I swallow. I’m not sure I want to hear any of this, but I need to know my enemy. Who is this guy that the horsemen really haven’t begun to punish? Why does he get a pass after what he did?
Maybe that’s what I should be focusing on. They punished Grant for calling out and then the betting thing. They punished Ethan for asking about them sharing me. But Zach trapped me in a closet and threatened to rape me and... nothing.
Sure, they’re watching him, but how much power does this guy have? They haven’t even really punished the Cheermonsters either, besides making Sidney stink, which probably barely dented her social capital. I glance Sidney’s way. She’s still watching me with that calculating look.
“You don’t have to talk about it, Izzy,” Nat says.
“No, it’s better all of us know what we’re dealing with.” Izzy straightens and meets my eyes. “There were nights that I slept over with Eric.”
She pauses and looks down at her hands. “He liked to have sex with me while I slept, so he always asked me to take something before bed. Eric could be sweet and kind and so tender. It really wasn’t hard to fall in love with him and to trust him.”
My skin crawls. I don’t know if I want to hear what happened.
She blows out a breath and shakes her hands. “Fuck.”
“You don’t have to tell me.” I shake my head.
“You need to know if he’s coming after you.” Izzy’s blue eyes swim with unshed tears. “I woke up one morning with bruises on my hips and feeling more sore than usual. I won’t say that Eric was gentle all the time, but he didn’t really hurt me.”
My stomach churns violently. The implication and what I know about Zach... fuck.
“Why didn’t you report it?” Kenz asks quietly.
Izzy shrugs and touches her throat. “I took the drug knowing what it would do. I trusted Eric to keep me safe.”
“Wait, you broke up with Eric because he cheated on you? Not for that?” I try to keep my tone level, but she stayed with him?
“I was in love. It’s crazy the things you do when you’re in love.” Izzy smiles and a tear slips down her cheek. “Eric told me he got carried away, but the next time I saw Zach... the look he gave me... I knew.”
My heart thumps heavy against my breastbone. I can’t imagine my guys allowing anyone to touch me, to hurt me the way Zach hurt Izzy.
“It’s not too late to report him.” Kenz looks straight into Izzy’s eyes. “He shouldn’t get away with it.”
“There’s no evidence.” Izzy shakes her head and smiles warily.
“It would be my word against his and I don’t actually have a memory of him...
doing anything. Besides, he’s untouchable.
His parents are stupid wealthy. He’s got a full ride to play basketball in college. They’re already talking NBA for him.”
“None of this is your fault.” Kenz looks around the table at the other girls. “It’s never on us if someone takes advantage of us.”
“In this town.” Penny scoffs. “The powerful remain powerful while the weak get taken advantage of.”
Like my guys. They want something they go after it relentlessly, but if I hadn’t given them the green light, they would have stopped. They gave me shitty options but at least they gave me options. Mostly.
Izzy dabs at her eyes with a napkin while Nat rubs her back. It’s time Zach pays for what he’s done.