11. Aspen
ASPEN
I’d had weird dreams all night. Dreams where I was lying frozen in bed, while people surrounded me, staring down while I was unable to move.
Strangely, I hadn’t been frightened. Apprehensive, yes, but not as terrified as I thought I should have been.
I didn’t think the people wanted to harm me.
It was more like they were curious about who lived here now and wanted to check me out.
Had they been ghosts, in my dreams? The conversation with Blake about the hotel and how energy must be absorbed by the building must have sunk into my subconscious.
I’ve woken to a bright day outside, the birds tweeting, and the sky clear and blue. There’s a chill in the air though, a signal that the weather will be changing soon.
The entire day stretches ahead of me, and I wonder what I’m going to do with my time.
I’d like to take a walk and draw, but I also don’t want Blake to think I’m not keen to contribute to the upkeep of this place.
The thought of working alongside Blake for the day isn’t such a bad one, as long as Levi doesn’t show up.
I do also want to explore, though. I’ve only seen a fraction of Windridge Hall so far.
I’m supposed to stay out of the east wing, but that still leaves a ton of the building to take in.
Then there’s the vast grounds, too. I want to check out the maze and some of the trails.
I figure as long as I can keep Windridge Hall in my sight, I’m not likely to get lost.
The signal on my cell phone is non-existent. There’s no reply from Tobias to the message I sent last night, but that might be down to the bad service. I told him the signal would be patchy, so I hope he doesn’t worry.
I dress in a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, use the bathroom to freshen up and brush my teeth, then leave my room. It still feels strange, walking these vast corridors alone. Will I ever get used to it?
There’s a chance I won’t be here long enough to get used to it, but it’s not like I have anywhere else to go.
Will Blake be up already? It feels wrong to help myself to his kitchen, but if I’m going to live here, I can’t wait around to be served every time I need something to eat or drink.
I hope I don’t find Levi sitting at the kitchen table.
I make my way through the corridors, trying not to get spooked.
It’s ridiculous when it’s first thing in the morning, and bright sunlight outside, but the corridors are all internal, so it might as well be the middle of the night.
I reach the stairs and exhale a sigh of relief at the bright shafts of sunlight flooding through the tall windows above the doors.
I trot down the stairs and head to the kitchen, desperate for coffee.
I freeze in the doorway.
Levi isn’t sitting at the kitchen table, but he is standing in the same position as his father had been last night—at the sink, looking out through the window, onto the grounds.
Fully prepared to turn around and sneak back up the stairs, I hold my breath, willing him not to notice me.
My heart hammers, and adrenaline makes me dizzy, but I force myself to stay put instead of running away.
If I’m going to stay here, I need to get used to being around him.
Even so, I’d prefer for his father to be here, too.
I’m on the brink of turning on my heel when he catches my movement out of the corner of his eye.
“Good morning, Aspen,” he says, though his blue eyes remain cold and he doesn’t smile.
“Morning!” I chirp back, as brightly as possible, as though I hope to defrost his chilliness with my warmth. “Just grabbing a coffee then I’ll leave you in peace.”
“I’ve already made some.” He nods to the almost full pot. “Help yourself.”
Wow, is Levi actually being civil?
I scurry over to the pot, realize I don’t have a mug, and start a search of the cupboards.
I feel the weight of his gaze on my back the entire time.
It would be easier to ask him where they’re kept, but I’m trying to minimize our interactions.
I open a door to find rows of identical gray mugs.
Bingo. I take one then realize I need to repeat the process with the drawers to find a teaspoon.
I normally take sugar in my coffee and a ton of creamer, but I’m not going to waste time trying to find that as well. I just want to grab my caffeine hit and get the hell out of here.
With the mug full, I turn to take it back to my room, but Levi plants a hand against the cupboard behind me, boxing me in with his arm.
My pulse picks up again, and I snatch a breath. He’s so physically close. I feel like a mouse trapped under a lion’s paw. I still have the coffee in my grip, and I fight the urge to throw the scalding liquid in his face and run.
The muscle in his bicep flexes beneath his sleeve. He has tattoos, like his dad, but not as many. Where the fuck is Blake? The scent of Levi’s bodywash rolls over me, clean and fresh, like he’s recently got out of the shower. Now I think about it, his dark hair is still damp at the nape.
He cocks his head, appraising me.
“What are you doing here?” he demands.
Is that a trick question?
Anxiety mixed with indignation spikes through me. I don’t really belong anywhere, and I feel like Levi knows that, and is playing on my insecurities.
“You know what I’m doing here. Blake offered me somewhere to stay until I get back on my feet.”
“Do you want to screw my dad?”
I jolt back, my stomach dropping. Jesus Christ. What’s with these men assuming I’m only in this to get laid?
“No!” I exclaim. “There’s more to me than my ability to spread my legs, you know.”
He arches one dark eyebrow. “I highly doubt that. You’re like a new project to him. You know that, right? Like this goddamned hotel. He loves a project. A fixer-upper. That’s all you are.”
I struggle to keep my voice steady. “I don’t expect to mean anything to him. Like I said, he’s just helping me out with somewhere to stay. Believe me, this is on a short-term basis only. I’m sure this place is big enough that we can choose to avoid each other.”
I’m used to not being liked, and struggling to fit in, but Levi has taken it to the extreme. Is he jealous? Doesn’t he want to share his daddy with anyone? He’s a grown man; shouldn’t he be out living his own life?
I remember what Blake said about his son having some issues.
Now I’ve met the man in question, I see why Levi was the reason my dad and Blake fell out.
While I’m sure it’s only natural for Blake to want to defend his son, if my dad had told him a few home truths about Levi, I can see how that would become enough of a wedge between them to stop them from talking.
I shake my head and try to duck under his arm, but he moves to block me. Anger flares through me at his physical ability to control me.
I grit my teeth. “Maybe I should leave.”
I don’t only mean the room. I should leave Windridge Hall. But I have nowhere else to go, and the thought of starting over is exhausting.
“Yes, please do. We don’t want you here.”
His words hit me like a slap, and I do my best not to show my reaction. Besides, at least one half of them does, because his dad brought me here, but I don’t point that out.
Levi lowers his arm to give me space to run. I want to—I really do—but I also don’t want to give him the satisfaction of seeing me scurrying away.
He plucks the cup of coffee out of my hand and sets it on the counter.
“I was going to drink that,” I protest.
He bites his lower lip, and his gaze runs up and down my body.
“What does your body look like under those clothes? It looks good from here.”
My cheeks flare with warmth. “That’s none of your business.”
“Why?” He leans in slightly and lowers his voice. “Are you worried Daddy will hear us if things get heated?”
I struggle to breathe. “Nothing is going to get heated. I don’t want anything to do with you. I just want us to stay out of each other’s way.”
“You can pretend I’m him, if you want.” His perfect lips curve in a smirk. “Close your eyes and I’ll slip my fingers into your panties, and you can moan his name.”
My heart is beating so hard, it fills the whole of my chest. “Fuck off, Levi.”
Shit, this isn’t going to work. Is this what Blake meant when he said Levi was wild? He clearly has zero boundaries. He doesn’t even like me and he’s talking to me like this.
“Do you ever watch porn, Aspen? Do you use your fingers to get yourself off, or do you prefer to use toys?”
His gaze is so intense, it’s as though it’s burning into me.
“I like to watch girls getting gang banged,” he says, his voice low. “Lots of men fucking her at once. Cocks in every hole. She comes so many times, she doesn’t know where she is or even what her own name is.”
Jesus Christ. What the hell am I getting myself into? I shove at his chest, claustrophobia filling me. “You’re disgusting.”
He doesn’t budge. “You ever fantasized about that? Taking more than one man at once? You ever done it for real?”
I have fantasized about it. Haven’t most girls? It doesn’t mean I’d want to do it for real, though, and certainly not with someone like him.
A slow smile touches the corners of his lips. “You have, haven’t you?” He leans in closer and inhales the side of my neck. “You know my favorite bit? When they get rough with her, pull her hair, slap her around a little. I always come then.”
Despite myself, a low heat has coiled deep inside me. A tingling at my core. My nipples have tightened.
Tobias was always way too vanilla with me.
I used to try to get him to experiment a little, to put his hand around my throat, or bring a toy into the bedroom, but he never seemed to be interested.
He liked to fuck me from behind, but doing that same position, week after week, got kind of boring for me.
He’d always seem pretty satisfied with our sex life, though, so I’d kept my darker fantasies to myself.
I’d thought there was something wrong with me for wanting him to hurt me while he fucked me, and that he might think I was weird.
Even worse, I worried he’d tell his friends what I’d said.
Tobias is a social butterfly, and there’s nothing he enjoys more than hanging out with the guys.
I’d all too easily pictured them laughing about me and my weird ‘tastes’ over a beer.
But this man is seriously unhinged. Who talks this way to a woman he’s only just met?
It’s only because of his intensity that I’m even still standing here.
The way he’s looking at me feels like his eyes have pinned me to the floor.
I’m breathless and embarrassed and, though I’d never have admitted it to him, turned on.
Does Blake have any idea that this is the kind of thing Levi would say to me? I highly doubt it. What if I went and told him?
I can’t do that, though. Blake and my dad didn’t speak for years because of Levi. What if I say something and Blake decides he doesn’t want to speak to me either? Perhaps it would be for the best, but I can’t bring myself to lose another person from my life. I’m so incredibly lonely.
I swallow hard and stare up at the man pinning me in.