49. Blake
BLAKE
Aspen returns to her room, and I go to find my youngest son. He’s chopping wood for the pile, his shirt off, even though it’s literally freezing out here. Sometimes I wonder if Levi is even human.
“Aspen knows about Dov,” I announce.
Levi thwacks the axe into a solid piece of log and leaves it there before turning to face me. “I guess it was going to happen sometime. How did she react?”
I consider this. “She seemed… relieved.”
He arches one dark eyebrow. “Relieved? Not frightened?”
“I think she prefers to know she’s not going crazy.”
“But she doesn’t know what he’s capable of,” he says.
I can’t help grimacing a little. “Let’s hope she never has to find out.”
“How much did you tell her?”
“Enough, but not all of it, naturally.”
A few flakes of snow drift from the sky, settling on the wood and the axe.
Levi takes his long-sleeved shirt from out of where he’s had it tucked down the back of his jeans and shrugs it on.
He glances up at the sky, a few white flakes settling on his dark hair and eyelashes.
I know exactly what he’s thinking. If she was going to find out, at least now she won’t have much time to change her mind about staying.
“Can we trust him with her?” Levi says. “What if he takes things too far?”
I consider this. “He seems to be gentle with her. Maybe this time will be different.”
“And if it isn’t?”
“I don’t think he’ll hurt her. He knows she’s important to me—to us.”
Levi stares at me and shakes his head. “You’re putting too much faith in him. If he was able to control himself, we wouldn’t have him hidden up here. You already saw what he did to Aspen’s boyfriend.”
I tense at the mention of that asshole. “He did what needed to be done. You saw the footage Dov recorded. That little prick tried to rape her.”
“And she fought him off. She dealt with it.”
“No. She’s too kind. He’d have said some sweet nothings in her ear, and she’d have taken him back.
He put his fucking hands on her. You want to live with that?
Some little prick touching what is ours?
” I can see in the tightening of his features that he doesn’t.
“Besides,” I continue, “the boyfriend had offered her a second option, though he wouldn’t have said as much.
If she’d thought she had somewhere else to go, she might have taken it. You want her to leave?”
Levi shakes his head. “Of course not. Anyway, the pass will be closed off soon, and then we’ll be all out of options.”
“You know the three of us men alone in this hotel when the long nights and the isolation sets in isn’t a good idea.”
I remember telling Aspen when she’d first arrived about how I believed the walls of a place could absorb the energy of the people who’d lived—and died—inside them.
This hotel has been standing for a long time, and many souls have passed through its door—and some of them never made it out again.
When the days are long and bright, it’s easy to ward off any restless souls, but when the dark and the claustrophobia set in, well, then it’s a whole different matter.
Then it’s much harder to fight the darkness, and sometimes we lose.
Having Aspen here changes things. She gives us a reason to focus on the light. With her, we might be able to make it through winter without incident.
I know she’s felt the truth of this place. She’s sensed the cold spots, the feelings of being watched. She’s putting all that down to Dov now, and it’s easier that way. He’s far simpler to explain.
It’s possible to fight even a man of his size. Far less easy is fighting off the ghosts of those who believe this hotel is their home, who don’t want us here, who grow stronger with the long nights and the short days.
The weaker we become, the stronger they are.
Aspen gives us something to be strong for. Being inside her, touching her, holding her, gives us pleasure and a distraction. She’ll stop us from getting lost in our own heads and allowing the others who live here to creep in.
People would probably wonder why I’ve held on to the hotel, considering the risks.
I love Windridge Hall. I feel a kinship with it.
I am its guardian, its custodian. It is home to me, and, even with its issues, I want to see the place restored to how it used to be.
Perhaps then the ghosts that walk its long corridors would finally be at rest?
What would happen if I sold the place and some developer came and tore it down?
I would never forgive myself. The other reason is my eldest son.
Here, I can go about my day without worrying that Dov might come across someone he loses it with.
Sure, there’s the occasional hiker who might pass through our property, or the occasional contractor who I have no choice but to get in for jobs I’m unable to manage myself, but he’s learning to stay away from them.
The cameras help. They give him a way to watch over the place without having to physically come in contact with others.
But now he’s made contact with Aspen. Or rather she made contact with him. He understands why she’s here. He likes her. And she doesn’t seem afraid of him, which is a good thing, though she hasn’t actually seen him yet. She’s less likely to try to run if she’s not afraid of him.
“So, she’s staying?” Levi asks.
“She’s still here, isn’t she? Just don’t do anything to fuck things up.”
Levi snorts. “I shouldn’t be the one you need to worry about. Now she knows about Dov, he’s not going to bother to stay hidden anymore. Why would he? He knows his presence isn’t going to scare her away. And you know Dov. He takes what he wants.”
I arch my brow. “Like you’re much different?”
“I have some self-control,” he says, though he glances away like he can’t meet my eye. “And I don’t see you exhibiting much of that yourself with Aspen around, Dad.”
“Well, we’ve almost made it. The snow is already falling. Soon, she won’t be able to leave, no matter what happens.”
“You think she’s strong enough to make it through?”
I draw a breath. “I hope so.”
“Yeah, me too. She’s surprised me so far.” He chuckles. “I thought with everything we’ve thrown at her, she’d have run for the hills by now.”
“She’s desperate. Desperate for a home. Desperate for family.”
Maybe I should feel bad for taking advantage of that, but I don’t.
I’ve given her what she needs. Perhaps she doesn’t understand the full implications of what she’s accepted yet, but she will.
I haven’t done anything to force her to stay.
She’s had plenty of opportunities before the snow falls to find somewhere else, but she hasn’t.
She’s willingly given her body and her heart, and I’ve willingly accepted it.
Levi stares, unblinking. “You think that’s what we are to her now? Family?”
“She doesn’t have anyone else.”
“And what about by the end of winter? You think she’s still going to think of us that way then?”
“I don’t know what will happen by the end of winter. I just want to make it through with all our hearts and souls intact.”
Without letting the darkness in.