Chapter 48 The VIP Box, Eve #2
Every instinct in me wants to crumble. To weep for the mother who saw her child.
To run until I find Gael and beg him to get me out of here.
To take the poison and kill Rafe and Lorian to end this.
But I don’t do any of it. Instead, I remind myself to hold my rehearsed mask with each step; shoulders back, chin up, and to breathe evenly.
I must be calm and keep a clear mind to make the best decisions now.
Terra Ka is still relying on me for information and Rafe and Lorian are still relying on me to give Terra Ka the information they want me to give.
And I am relying on myself to give each just enough to hold the balance. No more.
A steward bows to me as we pass. I incline my head as though I belong here, as though I am not dying inside.
Then I remember what the Commander said on the Igo: you must act as an equal to your Reima Two colleagues. He was right. If I want to survive long enough to betray everyone, I have to be flawless in this role.
Back in my rooms, the Starlight Array’s feed fills my room with silver light. I don’t need to be watching anyone as I’ve gathered all the information I can right now, but I’ve become obsessed with watching Briar.
Briar. From St. Catherine’s. My bully turned human pet.
She’s in her quarters and kneels naked, leash taut in trainer Aefre’s fist. Ember, her human male partner, is dragged by a leash to her pussy by Aefre’s assistant, and then everything happens at once—leather, shocks, and orders barked in Imperial. And their bodies obey.
Aefre says,“You’re such a good boy, Ember. On the count of three, you can lick her like she’s your dinner. One, two…” he purposely pauses, “three.”
Ember attacks Briar’s overgrown dyed-pink bush like a man who has been sex starved, and I can’t look away.
What’s wrong with me?
On the screen, Aefre says, “That’s a good boy, Ember. Yes, lick her lightly right there. Not too much. Back off a little. Look at the way she trembles. Oh, good girl. That’s what she likes. Don’t you, Ash? Get back in there, Ember, right there on your left side. Lick boy.”
It’s unnerving to hear Briar be called Ash, her pet name.
It’s a reminder that everything really has been taken from her, including her name.
But I watch on and lean forward in my chair, my thighs pressing together, aching despite the soreness that lingers from nights with the Sovereigns.
My clit feels rubbed raw from too much use, but the sight of Ember’s blonde beard wet with Briar’s desire makes me ache all over again.
It’s so wrong that this is a turn-on, but I can’t help it.
This place is fucking me up so badly.
I slide my hand into my trousers and underwear, brushing my fingers over my swollen folds, slick with a need I can’t explain. I shouldn’t even be watching this, but I can’t look away.
Aefre pulls on Briar’s leash and says, “On all fours, Ash. I know this is the way you like it best. Like an animal.”
“Yes, Master Aefre.”
“Bring Ember closer. Yes, that’s it. Oh, look how hard you are. I bet you both are dying to have sex. Those chastity belts must have been torture. In fact, I know they were. I saw the readouts.”
I am sure they were, I think, and somehow the mention of the chastity belts makes me feel better about watching them because I can relate.
I am so fucked up.
Aefre pulls Briar’s leash, so she arches higher, her nipples taut, her mouth open, and my body reacts. My fingers circle faster, harder, the sting of overstimulation only making it hotter. My vagina clenches desperately around nothing. I bite my lip to smother the sound threatening to escape me.
Shame burns in me. I’m no better than the Imperials in the VIP box. I tell myself I’m different, that I hate what I’m seeing. But my body doesn’t care. My body craves exactly this, and I can’t look away.
I’m a terrible person.
Aefre fucks her hard, his cock glistening, while Ember is forced to hold her nipples taut then lick up Aefre’s come.
It’s disgusting and erotic all at the same time.
Then Aefre holds Ember’s leash as he fucks her too.
The Array displays their biometric numbers spike—orgasms confirmed.
My own release is already building—jagged, sharp, humiliating.
I wonder if Rafe still gets alerts on his IC when my own biometrics spike even though I’m not wearing the Venus Lock anymore. I imagine him now, relaxing before dinner and getting a notification that I’m masturbating.
After everyone, including me their unknown voyeur, has reached climax, I am about to turn the feed off when I notice the biometrics flash red. Briar has just peed, and a new data line has appeared.
I freeze, my fingers still wet between my thighs.
“No,” I whisper, my hand flying from my cunt to the console. My heart slams as I override the system, rerouting the flag into static. The pregnancy notification disappears. The record resets as if it were a glitch.
Briar curls back onto the bed, exhausted, none the wiser. She doesn’t know what I’ve just risked for her. She doesn’t know I’ve committed a serious crime—hiding medical truth, falsifying data, a treason in both Imperial and Reima Two law.
I sit back, shaking, my thighs wet, my sex sore, and my shame coating me like a second skin. I’ve surprised even myself. Who knew a woman working for demons in Hell still had an ounce of goodness left in her?
The dinner chime sounds. I stand, remove my uniform, and force my breathing to steady.
I calmly put on the purple dress Lira helped me pick out and practice wearing the mask Rafe and Lorian expect in my reflection in the mirror: poised, professional, and untouchable.
Their equal. Their human liaison. Their lover.
And inside, I’m their betrayer. I’m everyone’s betrayer.
When I walk into the dining hall, I do so as though nothing out of the ordinary happened in the last hour. No one saw the crime I just committed. No one saw the way I masturbated watching Briar degraded and adored all at once.
No one sees that, inside, I am drowning in equal parts shame and defiance. And quite possibly on the verge of insanity.