Chapter 3 #2
“What baby? I took the assignment seriously. That’s what you wanted me to do.
I got questions.” He laughed at me before he turned back toward Dr. Long.
“We wrote down the things that we wanted to do, and her list had me a lil bit throwed. It was mostly about her fantasies. A threesome was listed as curious. Public sex is a must-try. Recording was a must try. And this last one just straight up threw me for a loop… degradation, must try.”
I hung my head and shook it aimlessly.
“Tim, that was a couple’s exercise. This man is not a sex therapist.” I mumbled, ashamed. Embarrassment washed over me quicker than I had imagined it would.
“Actually, sex therapists focus on helping to increase libido, difficulty with arousal, and helping navigate through sexual trauma. We’re focusing on trust, communication, and connections.
You’re right where you need to be, but if you would like a referral to someone to see which style best fits you, I know a person.
” Dr. Long offered. I blew a deep sigh. Because I stand corrected, now I have no way out.
“It’s fine. I’ve just been put on the spot, is all.” I sat back in the chair, and they both chuckled. Tim grabbed my hand and rubbed the back of my palm with his thumb.
“What exactly do you question, Mr. Thompson?” He asked as he tapped his pen against the notepad.
“I want her to explain what each one of those looks like for her. Especially the degradation. As my wife, I never wanted to feel disrespectful toward her. But shit.” His words trailed off as I bit the inside of my jaw nervously.
“As far as a threesome, I would definitely want to just watch. Or even join without the other person interacting with me. Public sex, I feel like I would like the idea of being in an area where no one knew me personally, and they could watch us. I don’t think we’ve ever made a video; I'd like to. We might want to watch it at a later date, to set the mood. And degradation… I don’t know.
I might not want to be called beautiful or pretty. ”
His face frowned in confusion as he looked at me for a second without speaking, “If you felt that way, why haven’t you said it before now?” He asked, waiting for my response with his hand underneath his chin.
I chuckled as I looked at the expression on his face, “Trust me, Tim. I’ve never felt like that before.
Apparently, I’m not as experienced as I think I am.
Most of my list came from me browsing a couple of categories on a website.
Have you ever heard the saying ‘you don’t know what you don’t know ’?
It’s not that deep,” I leaned forward and kissed his cheek, and grabbed his hand to rub it. I could see him visibly relaxing.
Up until now, Dr. Long had just let us navigate what we needed to get through, but then he finally stepped in.
“For my clarification. Are you more surprised about the things on the list, or concerned that you feel that she’s been having these feelings prior to last week?” He asked Tim as he looked up from the last word that he had scribbled on the paper.
“Uh, probably both. I thought everything between us sexually was good-”
“It’s great,” I emphasized truthfully. It was never my intention to make him feel like I hadn’t been satisfied.
When he didn’t respond right away, I continued.
“Tim, I don’t want this to turn into something that it’s not.
I thought the purpose of this was to discuss the experiences we missed and would like to try.
Don't magnify our sex life because that’s not the issue.
You mentioned a threesome at least three times before; it’d be unfair for me to think that you’ve been unhappy with our intimacy because you might still want to have one. ” I shot back.
After a moment of silence, the doctor spoke.
“That’s a great point,” Dr. Long agreed as he continued writing.
Tim didn’t say anything; he just reached out to me, pulled me closer to him, and kissed my forehead. I nestled against his body and rubbed his knee.
“So where do we go from here?” Dr. Long asked, looking toward Tim.
“We did every other exercise, and I don’t think we had any questions about them. We both had only one rule: safety. We will both test partners, and there will be no pregnancies. I just feel like we need to come up with a plan to execute it.”
“What would that plan look like for you?” Dr. Long shot back.
“I don’t think it needs to be a weekend. More like twenty-four hours. A ‘one-night stand’, type of deal. We can choose a person to fulfill whatever fantasies we had on the list.”
“I agree with that.” I chimed in only to agree, letting him take the lead on the planning.
“So, do you come up with an action plan beforehand? Do you write this plan down and have the other person agree to who’s fulfilling the fantasy?” Dr. Long asked.
“Nah, I don’t want to control it. If we’re going to do it, we just have to trust the other person. Just no friends or family.” Tim suggested.
“That’s fine,” I said quietly.
“So, the final agreement is that you guys do one night only? No friends or family, neither of you will know what the fantasy was or who was chosen to fulfill it?”
“Yeah.” We said at the same time. He nodded and continued to scribble his thoughts.
“What’s the plan for reconnecting after?” He asked, eyebrow raised.
“A vacation?” I suggested, and Tim nodded in agreement.
Dr. Long shot off a couple of questions after that, which I thought were really helpful to the process.
He made me and Tim think and discuss things that hadn’t come up during the exercises.
After getting over the initial shock of having him be the person to help us get through this, I was actually beginning to be grateful that it was him.
He is really good at what he does, and it was no wonder that he had all the accolades that he did.
We had some meaningful conversations and even moments of reassurance that I don’t think anyone else would have noticed.
By the time the session was over, I felt so much better about everything that had been weighing on me.
“Mr. and Mrs. Thompson, this is the end of your session. I feel like you two have a solid starting point, and the rest of the journey is up to you. If you want to continue your sessions before your solo encounter, you can always schedule another session with my admin. If you want, I can email you some exercises to do after the encounter that help you with reconnection, but I feel confident that you guys have a solid foundation.” Dr. Long said as he stood and silenced his timer.
“Preciate you, doc,” Tim said as they shook hands, and then he extended his hand to help me from the seat.
“Thank you, we appreciate it,” I said. I shook his hand quickly, and then Tim guided me out of the office with his hand on the small of my back.
We walked through the frosted door and out into the office's main lobby, where Shareese was seated, listening to music at a low volume. There was only one other person seated there, in the corner.
“Thank you for visiting Long Term Therapy. Have a great day.” She smiled.
“Thank you, you as well.” I returned the gesture and walked outside.
After we got in the car, the ride was quiet for the most part. I opened my phone and scrolled through a couple of emails. Tim’s hand went to my thigh, causing my eyes to slowly go from my phone to him.
“How do you feel about the therapy session?” He asked.
“I think it went well, don’t you?”
“Yeah, it went better than I thought it would,” He chuckled, and his grip on my thigh became firmer.
Once we reached the stoplight, he leaned over and pecked my lips.
“I love you,” I said as I put my phone in the cup holder and caressed the back of his neck.
“I love you too, baby.” He said as he turned back to the road and eased off the brakes, letting the car slowly roll forward.
We transitioned into a bit of small talk about work and the things we needed to handle on the way there. I don’t know what the future will hold, or if there will even be any encounters, but I knew that we left the office fully prepared to do what we saw fit.