Chapter 14
Garth’s light, airy croissant felt like a rock in my gut as I led the way through the B and B’s kitchen. Drew followed me out to the back deck. Rita, pushing Mavis in the stroller, brought up the rear of our little parade.
Xander was bent over, still tinkering with the hot tub’s motor, but our arrival made him look over his shoulder. “Oh, hello,” he said with his usual friendliness as he straightened up and faced us.
In response, Rita eyed Xander suspiciously while Drew threw some major shade his way. Only Mavis seemed glad to see him, cooing and waving her arms in absolute delight.
Xander took in the chilly greeting from my two friends. Then, his gaze slid over to me. His expression was a mix of accusation, surprise, and hurt. “You told them?” he asked.
The rock in my gut turned into a boulder.
“No,” I said quickly, shaking my head.
Xander’s brows came together in bewilderment. “Then, what…?”
“Listen, I’m sorry,” I said to him, my words coming out in a rush.
“But they know me too well, and they could tell I was hiding something. And I know—I know—the more people who know a secret, the harder it is to keep. But, um…there’s also safety in numbers.
And right now, you need safety.” I gestured at my friends.
“And, uh…they’re numbers. They can help.
” I paused. “Or I’m sure they will, once they get past the initial shock of it all,” I added.
I watched as Xander processed this. “So, you want me to tell them?” he asked in a tone that could only be described as incredulous.
“Not exactly.” I shifted my weight uncomfortably from one moccasin to the other. “To be honest, I think they’re going to need the visual.”
Xander gaped at me with something like horror. “You expect me to show them?”
Oh no! Did he think I was acting like some creepy sideshow barker? Expecting him to perform on cue like a trained circus monkey or something?
“Only if you want to, of course,” I said quickly. “And not in an abracadabra sort of a way. More in a…here-I-am-being-my-authentic-self sort of a way.” I smiled.
Xander looked at me doubtfully.
“Hannah,” said Drew, “what the fuck is going on?”
I motioned for Drew to be quiet as I continued to focus on Xander. “Okay, look,” I said. “You trust me, right?”
Xander’s eyes locked on mine, and he stared at me for what felt like a long time. And yes, okay, maybe bringing half the neighborhood over for a surprise show-and-tell session wasn’t exactly inspiring trust.
The boulder in my gut became Mount Everest.
“Yes,” he said finally. Maybe a little grudgingly. “I trust you.”
I breathed a small sigh of relief. “Well, I trust them,” I said simply, indicating my friends.
He continued to hold my gaze.
“Please,” I said. “They already know something’s up. If you don’t let them in on the truth, they’re going to imagine something way worse.”
Our staring contest went on for a few more moments. Then, with an exhale of resignation, Xander started to unbutton my father’s flannel shirt.
“Uh, what exactly is he showing us?” asked Drew, frowning.
Rita, on the other hand, flashed a big grin. “Ooh, I think I’m going to like this,” she said.
“Let’s give him some privacy,” I said. I turned my back to Xander.
With an annoyed roll of his eyes, Drew did the same.
“Uh, Rita?” I prodded.
“Party pooper,” she muttered. But she also turned around.
“This is stupid,” said Drew. “I don’t understand—”
“Just go with it, please,” I said. “You have to trust me too.”
“Does he have scars on his back?” asked Rita.
“No,” I said. It was an odd detail to just pull out of nowhere. “Why?”
Rita shrugged. “In the Outlander books, the hero also has long, red hair, and he has all these scars on his back from being lashed by this British officer who has the hots for him. So, since Xander was taking his shirt off, it made me think—”
Just then, we heard splashing from the hot tub, followed by a brief flash of lightning-bright light.
Drew looked up at the sky. “Is it supposed to rain?”
I didn’t answer.
After that, there was the sound of the water lapping against the sides of the spa, finding its level again. Then…nothing.
Here we go, I thought.
“Okay?” I called back to Xander.
More splashing. And…flopping.
Drew sniffed. “Is it low tide?”
“Shh,” I said.
“Okay,” came Xander’s voice.
Moment of truth.
I turned around, and my friends followed my lead.
Once again, Xander was in his merman form, sitting on the ledge of the hot tub. Earlier this morning, I’d been too stunned by the transformation to really absorb any of the details of his appearance. But this time, I was…absorbing.
His arms were folded across his chest, and he was scowling at me—but even so, he was magnificent.
His buff upper body—wet and glistening with water droplets—looked even bigger and broader than before.
Involuntarily, my gaze followed a bead of moisture as it rolled down his flat, toned stomach, past his navel, and onto his…
well, technically, it was his tail, but that word seemed too insignificant to describe what now comprised his lower body.
Below the waist, he was sleek and powerful and shimmering.
Now, I understood why Xander was so pleased to see the Jacuzzi.
A mere bathtub could never have accommodated the size of this merman half.
I noted the small scar on his right tail fin, where he’d been injured.
But the slight imperfection only enhanced his beauty.
He certainly didn’t remind me of a fish—or only as much as a fire-breathing dragon reminded me of a firefly.
Mostly, he reminded me of a superhero, straight out of the Marvel-verse.
Or maybe some mythological god. A mighty king of the deep.
I found myself imagining him with a cape and a crown and a trident.
In fact, I might have started imagining all sorts of things, but luckily, I remembered that Xander and I weren’t alone.
I glanced over at Drew, at Rita. They were both standing stock-still, eyes wide, mouths open. I knew that reaction well. I waited, wondering if they were going to run and hide like I did. Not my proudest moment.
Just then, a high-pitched sound pierced the silence. It was…laughter?
Yup. Laughter. Baby laughter.
Mavis was so amused by the lot of us she was absolutely squealing with glee. And just like that, we all seemed to make a collective exhale and relax. I felt the tension in the atmosphere lift and dissipate.
Xander stopped scowling. And smiled.
My friends were still stunned, obviously. But I could tell they were coming around.
And based on my personal experience, I figured there might be a way to help speed along their recovery.
“Chocolate, anyone?” I asked.
* * *
I didn’t actually have any chocolate—hence, my earlier trip to Kneadful Things—but I did have all the ingredients for pancakes. So, while Xander was busy drying off, I whipped up a quick batter and began to make a huge stack while I filled my friends in on some of the details.
“He saved you?” asked Drew. “He saved you from drowning?”
“With magic?” asked Rita.
I’d never seen either of them more impressed. Or dumbfounded.
Once Xander was able to wear pants again, he joined us. As we all sat down around the kitchen counter to eat, he picked up the story where I’d left off. The part about him being hunted wasn’t any easier to hear the second time around.
And for the record, I wasn’t the only one who was moved.
I was pleased—though not surprised—to see my friends step up and meet the moment.
Reacting like the genuinely good people I knew them to be, Drew and Rita were not about to sit by and let anything bad happen to Xander.
Before the pancakes were gone, Drew was already mapping out a schedule for when we’d each be available for “Xander Watch.”
Xander looked dubious. And not at all happy. “‘Xander Watch’?”
“Whenever you’re, uh, in the hot tub,” said Drew, “one of us should be on lookout.”
“Is that really necessary?” asked Xander.
“This is a place of business,” said Rita, nodding her agreement. “People come and go here all the time.”
“Well, not all the time,” I said. I felt like someone should play devil’s advocate, if only to convince Xander of the plan’s merits. “Not in the off season, anyway. Right now, we don’t even have any guests.”
“But anyone could come through the front door,” insisted Drew. “At any time.”
“Exactly,” said Rita. “Like, what if Joey D catches a glimpse of the real Xander while he’s delivering the mail? Do you want him going door to door telling everybody you’re harboring a fish?” She turned to Xander. “No offense.”
He shrugged. “None taken.”
Suddenly, I heard the B and B’s front door open. We all did. We froze as one.
Which was ridiculous, really. If anyone had walked in on us, all they would have seen was me and my new handyman—by all appearances, my human handyman—having breakfast with a couple of the local small business owners.
Still, if Xander had been in the hot tub…
“Hannaaaah?” called a familiar voice.
Paulette.
“In here,” I called back.
A beat later, Paulette came barging through the swinging door like an angry toy poodle in a purple metallic puffer coat.
She stopped when she saw I wasn’t alone.
“Oh, good,” she decided. She hopped on a stool and sat with us.
“I need all the support I can get right now,” she said with a theatrical sigh.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. As if I couldn’t guess.
“Wills has his eye on someone else.”
We all exchanged a knowing look. Xander included.
“And what makes you think that?” asked Rita.
“My sister said she overheard him talking on the phone,” said Paulette. “About a ‘tasty little number.’ That was ‘sweet.’ And had ‘great legs.’” She glanced around at everyone. Then, her gaze landed on Xander. “What’s wrong with my legs?” she demanded.
Xander shrugged. “I’m not really an expert on legs.”
I had to stifle a laugh.
“Uh, Paulette,” said Drew gently. “Was Wills on the phone at the wineshop, by any chance?”
“Probably,” she said. “Why?”
“Because,” he said, “those are all terms that are used to describe wine.”
We waited while Paulette weighed that possibility.
“Well, what about the note?” she asked.
“What note?” I asked.
“I got an anonymous note,” she said. She pulled a folded piece of paper out of her coat pocket and handed it to me.
I unfolded it. There were a few lines printed on it in all caps. “‘Don’t be a stupid bitch,’” I read. “‘Listen to your sister. Wills is playing you. Love, Anonymous.’”
“So, it’s not just my sister saying this stuff,” said Paulette.
“Where did you find the note?” asked Rita.
“My sister said she found it.”
We all stared hard at Paulette.
One…
Two…
Thr—
“Oh, my Gaaaawwwwd,” wailed Paulette. She threw her hands in the air dramatically as she got up from the stool. “I should never listen to anything my sister says.” She snatched back the note and crumpled it up. “I need to go fix Wills a make-up smoothie. With an extra boost.”
Obviously, what Paulette really needed was a restraining order against her stalkerish sibling.
But Paulette had a big heart. And family meant something at the Jersey Shore.
Here, blood was still thicker than water—even when the blood was pumping through the veins of a woman who was totally creeping on your boyfriend.
So.
We all said goodbye to Paulette, and we returned to our earlier debate. Only, there was nothing left to debate. Paulette’s unexpected arrival had driven home the truth of Drew’s argument.
Xander Watch was on.