Chapter 18
I couldn’t sleep.
Lying in bed later that night, I listened for the wind, but it had died down a while ago, no longer buffeting against the windows and rattling the panes. The snowfall, I knew, was tapering off too.
I rolled over.
The power was still out, but Atlantic City Electric estimated everything would be back up and running by morning.
I rolled over again.
The Sunny Side had literally weathered the storm.
The B and B was safe and secure. I’d made sure of it.
I’d done my job. The only thing left to do—the only sensible thing to do—was to get some shut-eye.
That way, I’d be rested and ready to deal with any aftereffects of the nor’easter in what the forecasters promised to be the very cold light of day.
Too bad I was still wide awake.
With a frustrated sigh, I flopped onto my back and stared at the ceiling. Obviously, I was too keyed up to sleep. Thoughts of Xander—and of what had nearly happened between us—preoccupied my mind.
Oh, I’d made the right call. Of course I had. I’d had to prioritize the Sunny Side. And really, that interruption had come at just the right time. By putting a stop to things between Xander and me before we’d gone too far, I’d managed to preserve our working relationship.
Friendship?
Partnership?
Other…ship?
Okay, so things between us were complicated. And the more time we were spending together, the more complicated they were becoming. But wasn’t that reason enough to keep things platonic?
Yes. Yes, it was.
Of course it was.
Just because Xander and I were getting closer didn’t mean we had to get closer.
Did it?
“Ughhh!”
I rolled back onto my side, facing my nightstand. My gaze drifted from the flashlight standing upright on its surface down to the drawer where I’d stashed the new romance novels from Rita. And where I kept my vibrator.
Reading might help me fall asleep. Or, if the story turned out to be too stimulating, I could always relax myself another way.
Decision made, I reached over and opened the drawer.
* * *
About a hundred pages into reading the The Kraken’s Virgin Bride by flashlight, I wasn’t the least bit drowsy. Unfortunately, I wasn’t all that horny either. Mostly, I was just…angry. And getting angrier by the chapter.
The monster romance, I’d discovered, was also a slow burn. Usually, I enjoyed that trope, enjoyed the way the sexual tension between the two main characters continued to build and build over time until they simply couldn’t control themselves.
But in this story, I had to say, the heroine was annoying the shit out of me.
Obviously, she was attracted to the guy.
Kraken. Whatever. And it was clear he was attracted to her.
Okay, so they were in an arranged marriage.
And yes, okay, it was certainly a good thing that he’d sworn never to take her virginity without her full consent.
But she wanted him, for crissake! So, why did she insist on clinging to all her weak-ass reasons for not being with him?
Why wouldn’t she just go for it? Why was she sabotaging her own happiness?
Her behavior made me want to scream and grab her by her stupid shoulders and shake some fucking sense into her—
Oh.
Oooh.
It occurred to me that maybe there was a reason why this story was getting under my skin so badly. Maybe all this rage building up inside me wasn’t really for the novel’s virgin bride.
Maybe I was pissed off at myself.
After all, I was attracted to Xander. To put it mildly. And since we’d almost kissed, I couldn’t doubt he was attracted to me too. Plus, I…liked him. Genuinely liked him. So, why exactly wasn’t he here in this bed with me right now?
At first, yes, I’d thought it was important not to blur the lines between business and pleasure.
But as it had turned out, Xander wasn’t just some hired handyman.
We had history. Years ago, he’d been my savior.
Plus, he wasn’t just helping out. He was hiding out.
He was a merman, for crying out loud! So many lines were already so damn blurred they were pretty much nonexistent.
So…was Rita right? Was I just making excuses? Was I hanging on to a bunch of self-imposed rules that no longer even applied?
And if so, then…why?
What was I so afraid of, anyway?
Had my thinking really become so small that I couldn’t imagine a life big enough to have both Xander and the Sunny Side?
Somewhere deep inside me, that fire flared up again.
I closed the paperback and switched off the flashlight. The sun was nearly up, and I didn’t really care how the kraken and his virgin bride were going to overcome their obstacles and finally get together.
I had my own romantic roadblocks to clear.
* * *
In the morning, Xander trod carefully, giving me a wide berth as he tried to find his footing again after that almost-kiss.
I was anxious to rekindle our romance, but I didn’t want to make things between us even more awkward.
I was waiting to find the right time, the right words, the right…
everything. Besides, in the aftermath of the storm, there actually was quite a bit of work to be done around the Sunny Side.
With the power restored, I concentrated on making us a hearty breakfast to fuel us for the day ahead.
Meanwhile, Xander went through the B and B, inspecting the trouble spots in the ceiling and checking for any new leaks.
When we finally sat down to eat, I broke the uncomfortable silence between us by talking through the day’s to-do list.
“Wait,” Xander said, interrupting me. “You want me to shovel the snow?”
Because he was generally so amenable to any task I suggested, the question surprised me. “Is that a problem?” I asked.
He looked at me with amusement. “What happens when snow melts?” he asked.
“Is this another one of my father’s jokes?” I asked.
He grinned, and some of the tension between us lifted. “Actually, no.”
It took me a moment, but then I got it. Xander had legs when he was dry. But if he wasn’t dry…
“Oh, right,” I said. “Duh.” I couldn’t believe I hadn’t realized the problem sooner. “We can’t have melted snow seeping into your shoes or soaking through your pants, can we?”
He broadened his grin. “Not unless you want to deal with a very fishy situation.”
I laughed, and so did he. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t all that funny. But it helped relieve some of the tension.
After that, things between us weren’t totally back on track. But they were getting there.
* * *
Once we’d finished breakfast, Xander volunteered to try his hand at building a fire while I went on a search for some spare galoshes or wellies or waders—something he could wear outside. But I came up empty.
So, grabbing a couple of trash bags, I found him in front of the fireplace, stacking wood in the hearth, and suggested we improvise.
Kneeling in front of him, I helped him step into a Hefty tall kitchen trashcan liner. The impromptu waterproofing accommodated his long leg just fine. I was about to pull the drawstring tie tightly around his powerful thigh when—
Hang on, I thought, stopping myself.
What the hell was I doing? This makeshift solution wasn’t foolproof. Plastic trash bags—even the ultrastrong variety—could tear. Was I really going to send Xander out into the melting snow with such uncertain protection? Suddenly, this whole plan seemed reckless.
“You know what?” I said, shaking my head. “This is way too risky. I’ll go out and do the shoveling. For now, you should just stick with indoor projects.”
I yanked the trash bag down his leg, and—oops!—I accidentally brushed my knuckles against the fly of his jeans.
Xander’s abdomen tightened as he sucked in a sharp breath. His hiss of pleasure made my core clench.
Neither of us moved.
Suddenly, it dawned on me that I was on my knees in front of him. In a rather provocative position. In an instant, my panties were damp.
He must have had the same realization. I watched as the front of his jeans strained against his growing erection.
If I’d ever wondered whether his male parts responded like human male parts, I had my answer. More than that, it looked like they responded to me.
Now, my panties were drenched.
I felt hot. So hot. Maybe Xander hadn’t lit the fireplace yet, but he was setting me on fire.
Biting my lip, I stared at the fastenings on Xander’s pants. It would be so easy to—
Just then, Casey came tearing in from the kitchen, barking like nobody’s business.
Shit. I knew that bark.
Attempting to pull myself together, I stood up and ran after the dog. I managed to grab his collar and restrain him just as the front door opened and Joey D strolled in, trailing snow all through the lobby.
“Here comes Joey D,” he announced, his big grin blindingly white against his fake tan. “Bringing the mail. And bringing sexy back.”
His hair looked extra-gelled—a precaution against the elements, no doubt. He had galoshes on over his shoes, but he still wasn’t wearing long uniform pants.
“And speaking of sexy,” he said, seeing me. “Check you out, Hannah. You look fine like a premium wine. Not that boxed stuff.”
“Hey, Joey,” I said, still trying to compose myself. I really hoped he wasn’t picking up on any lingering signs of my arousal, thinking I might be in this state because of him. “I wasn’t sure if you’d make it today.”
“Are you kidding?” he said. “You know what they say.”
“No,” I said. “What do they say?”
“Neither snow nor rain nor, uh…uh…uh…” He floundered around for the rest of the saying. “Oh, hey,” he said, spotting Xander.
“Hello,” said Xander in a raspy voice. He was now holding the trash bag strategically in front of him. “Excuse me, please.” He spun quickly on his heels and headed out to the kitchen.
Joey watched him go. “That guy’s still here?”
“He works here now,” I said. I was sure I’d already told him that. “So, do you have my mail?”
“I do,” he said with that same proud, goofy smile.
Then, he just stood there, smiling at me.
“Well…are you going to deliver it?” I asked.
“Oh!” he said, reaching into his bag. “Yeah, yeah.”
He held out a couple of envelopes. But when I reached for them, he pulled them back out of my reach.
“Just a little tip from Joey D first,” he said. “Be careful of that Xander guy.” He raised his brows and lowered his voice to a whisper. “I think he might have a hard-on for you.”
I bit my bottom lip and tried not to laugh. He had no clue how right he was.