Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
MADDOX
Allison's visit is all I can think about. I thought I would feel better after but in truth, I feel like a weight is sitting on my chest. She had chosen drugs over her daughter; she threw away all that time she could have spent with Livvy just to get high. I was the one who kicked her out of our home, but she was gone long before that. I was never hung up on how our relationship turned out even before throwing her out, but that baby was my fucking world.
Losing her wasn’t just a heartbreaking event—it was a shattering of everything I held dear. While the end of our relationship was painful, it paled in comparison to the agony of losing a child who meant more to me than anything else. My focus and my heart were entirely wrapped around that baby, and without her, the sense of loss felt like a devastating void that eclipsed everything else in my life.
I've been at the gym the past week exhausting myself, trying to make sense of it all. It hasn’t worked. Lucien had enough of my shit two days ago and stormed out leaving me alone, and without a sparring partner.
Black Sabbath blares in the gym as I load more and more weight to the rack before starting another set. I get two reps in when the music comes to a sudden stop, and two eyes as green as my own come into view.
"You always did prefer the gym to people."
"Mama,” I breathe out as I take in the sight of my mother standing before me.
"Hi, Maddy." She smiles at me tenderly.
Magnolia Wilder wraps her arms around me, and I'm instantly transported back in time to being a little boy afraid of the dark and needing his Mama to help soothe him to sleep. I’m not ashamed to admit no matter how big I've grown or old I’ve gotten that there’s nothing like a hug from her. Henry and I always joke that she hugs you with her heart because she was able to make you feel so damn much from one.
She'd been on a year-long trip across Europe, one she's always dreamed of taking but seemed to always find a way to delay it. It wasn't until she retired from teaching at Thunder Ridge Elementary that we finally convinced her to take it, Henry and I just extended it out 10 months longer than she originally intended.
"Mercy?" I ask, knowing damn good and well one of my brothers must have called and ratted me out.
She gives me a knowing look. "Henry." That rat bastard.
I feel ashamed my brother called her back here because of me. "Mama, you didn't need to come back because of me. I’m fine.”
She pins with the same look she did when I was seventeen and tried to lie to her about the girl that had snuck out my bedroom window. "Of course, I did. You may be a grown man with more brawl than brains at times, but you’re still my baby. Besides, I think we've let you sit alone with this for too long."
I clench my teeth. "Mama. I said I’m fine."
She walks into the office as I trail behind her. "No, Maddy you aren't." Her tone is final, and I know better than to argue with her.
"Mama—"
"No. You can't 'Mama' your way out of it this time." She sits down and waits for me to sit beside her. "So, Evie?"
Fucking Aunt Joe. Mama and Joe have been best friends since they were toddlers. They drifted apart after Mama married Harold, and for years, their bond seemed to fade into the background. But when Joe’s husband passed away, it was as if those lost years vanished in a heartbeat. They fell back into their old rhythm, picking up right where they left off. It’s clear how perfectly they balance each other—Joe’s the tough, resilient one, while Mama’s gentle and nurturing. Their opposing qualities seem to complement each other flawlessly, creating a harmony that has always been there, even beneath the surface of time and distance.
"Yes ma'am."
"I knew it would eventually happen between you two." Of course, she did. You can’t hide nothing from the woman.
Mama laughs softly. "Maddox Cole, you’re so much like your Daddy it's unreal. Always keeping things close, not willing to let anyone see your pain, but I'm going to tell you a little secret. We see it."
That’s why I stayed away from here for so long. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I didn’t deserve to be seen or to have my suffering acknowledged. I convinced myself that my presence was unwelcome and that my pain wasn’t worth recognizing. I thought that if I kept my distance, I wouldn’t burden anyone with my struggles or make them uncomfortable. It was easier to stay in the shadows, avoiding the discomfort of facing others while grappling with my own sense of unworthiness and the belief that my suffering was something I had to bear alone.
Mama takes my hand in hers letting out a shaky breath. "I want to tell you something I should have told you long before now. It isn't easy for me to talk about this, and the only person who knows other than you is Joe." Her hands start to shake before grasping mine tighter.
"I was pregnant when your daddy passed away," she softly whispers.
The blood leaves my face. I instantly try thinking back to that time, but I was only three when he passed so I don't remember much. The only thing I remember is being woken to my mother's screams in the middle of the night after an officer informed her of my father's death. He was working nights at the steel mill and was on his way home when he nodded off at the wheel and hit an oncoming truck head-on. He died instantly.
"What happened?"
"Grief happened, Maddy. I stopped taking care of myself, barely took care of the three of you, most days I refused to leave bed. I was so consumed with anger and grief. I couldn't understand how life around me could just carry on when my world had just fallen apart," Mama says bitterly.
She takes a small unsteady breath clutching my hand. "Maddox, I didn't want to live in a world where your daddy didn't exist." Shame drips heavily from her every word.
I handed her a towel to dry her tears on. Mama closes her eyes. "It was like it happened yesterday. Joey leaned down in my face, put a hand on my belly, and asked me 'Maggie, is this really how you want to take care of the last piece of him?' I felt as if I was jerked out of the fog I had been trapped in, except it was too late. I lost the baby." Mama opens her eyes and all I see are my guilt-filled ones looking back at me.
"Mama that wasn't your fault."
"Wasn't it though? I chose to give up, and because of that choice I lost the baby."
"Mama, you lost your husband, nobody expected you to take that lightly. Grief doesn't come with an instruction manual." How in the hell can she blame herself for that?
"How is that any different than how you blame yourself for Livvy?" Magnolia Wilder is loving, patient, and a walking definition of strength, but make no mistake the woman doesn’t sugarcoat shit. She isn’t afraid to hurt our feelings or set us straight.
“Mama, it was my fault.” The words scrape my throat like sandpaper, heavy with the weight of guilt that threatens to drown me. My voice falters, trembling as I fight back the tears burning behind my eyes. “I didn’t double-check her chest straps that night.”
Her gaze softens, eyes shimmering with unspoken pain, but her voice is steady, warm like an embrace. “Maddox, do you have any idea how many times I’ve buckled you or your brothers in and didn’t double-check those straps?” She leans closer, her hand resting on mine, grounding me as the world spins out of control. “You didn’t choose to drink and drive, sweetheart. You chose to be a good father, even while carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.”
She pauses, her voice growing thick with emotion, yet filled with pride. “Olivia was blessed, so blessed to have someone like you as her daddy. And let me tell you something—only we know her time here was short. That precious baby, in the short time she spent with us, she knew nothing but love, safety, and perfection. That's all she ever knew.”
Her eyes glisten as she speaks, the love in her voice breaking through the grief that weighs heavy in the air. “That precious baby… all she ever felt was love—pure, unconditional, overwhelming love. In her little heart, she only knew the warmth of your arms, the safety of your voice, and the softness of your smile. She didn’t know pain, fear, or sadness. All she knew was the perfection of the life you gave her.” She squeezes my hand, her grip firm, as if willing me to believe every word. “In her short time with us, she lived a lifetime of happiness. That’s the gift you gave her, Maddox. That’s what she left this world knowing.”
Like she always did, Mama set my world right with just a few words. As much as it tears me apart to have lost her, I can’t deny the truth in what Mama said—Olivia lived a life full of love, no matter how brief it was. My sweet girl never knew anything but warmth and tenderness. She never felt pain, never faced fear. All she ever knew was the love I poured into her every moment, the kind of love that wrapped her in safety and made her little world perfect. And in the end, that’s all that matters.
"Maddy, I realized something after losing the baby. Your daddy didn’t leave me. I see him every time I look at Henny, hear Merc laugh, and feel him every time I'm near you.” A loving smile sits on my mother’s face. “Most of all, I learned that your daddy lived on because we lived on. I loved him so damn much; he hadn't truly left me." She smiles fondly to herself, no doubt thinking of him. "I won't lie to you, it was so hard to move life forward after losing both of them, but I knew your dad would have hated for me to shackle myself to such anguish for the rest of my life."
Mama wipes the tears from the corner of her eyes. "I'm begging you not to do that either." She takes my face in both her warm hands. "You lost your baby, and for that, I’m so sorry my sweet boy, but I can't lose another one of mine." I instantly wrap my arms around my mother and place a kiss on her head.
Despite losing her husband and child, Magnolia Wilder still carves out a way forward. She doesn’t need me to tell her that she was right but just needed to feel that she hadn't completely lost me either. And me? I just needed a hug from my damn Mama.
After one long hug, Mama insisted on helping tidy up the gym before sending me home. After making it home, I had every intention of showering and going next door, but I fell asleep the second my head hit the pillow.
So here I am at Joe's at 6:30 in the morning, pushing through the doors needing to see my girl. The moment I find her the heaviness from the emotional fuckstorm of yesterday vanishes. I find her standing at the office door and today her hair is down, hanging almost to her waist in loose waves, and the radiant smile she points my way makes my heart hammer in my chest like a jackhammer.
Fuck, I love her.
"Hey, Pretty Girl." A pretty blush covers her cheeks, and I decide I want to see her do that every day rather by my mouth or cock makes no difference to me.
"Hey there yourself," her raspy voice does me in. I stalk her back into the storeroom before slamming my lips to hers. Growling the moment she licks the scar on my mouth. I deepen the kiss when she suddenly slips. Frustrated with the height difference, I wrap an arm around her waist and deposit her on the metal island.
"Much better," I murmur against her neck.
"Maddox, you can't just pick me up like that."
Bullshit.
I lick the column of her neck before nibbling her ear. "Why the fuck not?"
"Because I'm too heavy." My blood boils at her words but I don't stop what I'm doing.
"The only thing heavy about you are these." I palm both her breasts in my hands before teasingly pulling her bra down under her breast leaving the material of her shirt to graze her hard nipples.
"Y-you know what I mean," she whines as I brush my fingers back and forth over her nipples. This is the only time I'll let her say such ridiculous shit about herself and then I’m putting it to rest.
I put my hands under her shirt and take my time making my way up her body. Taking my time to relish the soft parts of her body. "No, I don't." Evie's quick breaths drive me crazy as I make the slow trek to her delicious breast, gently rubbing my thumbs over her perky nipples. "Tell me," I urge her.
"I'm fat Maddox." I roll her nipples between my fingers before I pull my hands away from her and out of her shirt at her words. She pins me with a fiery gaze at the loss of my touch and I almost cave. This shit is testing the small sliver of willpower I possess when it comes to her, but we need to sort this shit out.
I trace the denim line that sits right along her slit. "The only thing fat about you is this pussy, and fuck, do I love it." I lean down in her face, taking that plump bottom lip between my teeth and bite gently. "You just insulted something I love very much. Now what should we do about that?"
Evie shudders, and I look for any trace of fear. Not finding any I continue, "The last time you accused me of calling you fat, I wanted to fuck you on my fat cock until it was all you thought about when you thought about that word." Her legs wrap around my waist seeking me out, my girl is enjoying this. "This time is different, you've upset me."
"Maddox—" I silence her protest with my mouth, slipping my tongue in, savoring the taste that’s all her.
“Hop off that counter and get rid of these damn pants." I step back, admiring the way her heavy tits bounce as she hops off the counter and with a smirk, she turns around, shucks her shoes, and undoes her pants. Then ever so slowly, slides them down her over her juicy ass as her pretty pussy teases me from its hiding spot in her panties. Little fucking vixen. All that exposed creamy flesh makes me want to eat her alive.
"Get back on the counter." Once she’s situated back on the counter, I go to her running my hands from her knees over the tops of her thighs; Evie trembles beneath my touch. My fingers brush her mound, and I find her little cotton panties absolutely drenched making me lose all resolve. In one hard tug, I rip her panties clean off her. "Scoot to the fucking edge." Panting, she scoots down. I nudge her legs open wide.
My mouth waters at the sight of her. I hit my knees and kiss the scars along her right thigh before licking the worst one that sits on top of her pussy. Evie's head is thrown back in pure ecstasy and when I lightly spank her clit, and her eyes roll back in her head. This woman will be the damn death of me.
"Feed me that pussy baby."
Instead of coming closer, she wraps a hand in my hair and tugs me to her wet center letting me know I was never really in charge here. I lazily lick her clit driving her crazy.
"Don't ever refer to yourself as fat again."
Spank .
"This body was fucking made for me, and you won't disrespect it again."
Spank .
I look up to see Evie biting the back of her hand to keep from being too loud. "Do you understand?" She nods her head. I give her clit one last sharp spank, needing to hear her words.
"YES!"
"Glad you agree. Now, be a good girl and keep fucking quiet," I growl and without warning I stick my tongue deep in her warm center and slide her off the counter and onto my shoulders standing to my full height. I feast like a madman on her and it isn't until I feel her release dripping down my face and pooling on my shirt do I finally feel satisfied.