Chapter 6
“Hold these.” I didn’t wait for David to respond before I shoved my heels into his hand. He was already carrying Emmy’s camera bag, Indie’s duffel, and Haven’s backpack.
To my surprise, he hadn’t uttered a single complaint on the walk over. In fact, he looked as calm and content as he could be. Calm for David still involved a pensive glare. But no eye rolls. No snarky scoffs.
“What?” I asked when he studied me in silence.
David lingered at my side. Even though we had plenty of space on the nearly empty beach, when he stood next to me, I felt like we were in a closed room.
I shifted my weight from one leg to another, reminding myself there was still enough air to breathe even if it felt like he was sucking it all up.
Emmy helped everyone pick their rocks, citing the need to choose something that represented them.
Indie volunteered to go first, selecting the tallest one in the bunch.
She needed help climbing it, so a few girls spotted her.
They held up their hands, doing their best to make sure she didn’t slip.
While they got into position and chatted among themselves, I tried to estimate how long it would take us to finish the group photo.
If we were back on campus within the next couple of hours, I could fit in a study session before meeting with my academic adviser.
Internal planning typically grounded me, but with every small gust of wind, I got a hint of David’s scent.
My teeth clenched as I struggled to maintain focus.
“You’re pissed,” David noted, his voice unusually low. Intimately low. We may as well be sitting across from one another in a candlelit restaurant. He raised a brow when he caught me glancing at his mouth. I took a deep breath, averting my gaze.
The sand, a dark brown with crushed orange and yellow shells mixed in, dug into the arches of my bare feet.
White seagulls glided so far apart they looked like polka dots on the cloudless blue sky.
The air smelled of salt and… David. There was no escaping the tiny observation that he looked good in the morning sun.
The desire to study him grew until not looking at him felt impossible, because maybe, just maybe, another glance would confirm my original assessment was incorrect.
“At me?” he continued, sounding more and more pleased with each syllable that rolled off his tongue. “For not causing trouble.”
I laughed and crossed my arms over my chest. “Contrary to popular belief, not everything is about you.”
“Then, if it’s not me, what’s got you all hot and bothered?” He maintained his low voice.
“Nothing.” I brushed my hands on the back of my pants, trying to get rid of the sweat on my palms. A part of me wished I had listened to Indie. It would have been nice to start in our casual outfits.
“If you keep pouting, you’ll ruin this fun day for the rest of us,” David said.
My brow raised in disbelief. “Fun? You’re having fun?”
His smile lit up his eyes, making his face more beautiful. I wondered if his awkward phase in high school was ever really that awkward, or were we all just annoying teens who believed if you weren’t perfect, you weren’t nice to look at.
“Of course. I’m having a blast being the group’s pack mule. Are you not having fun? The peaceful sound of waves, cold sand between your toes, and a personal chauffeur not doing it for you?”
“Oh, I’m living the dream.” Right as I said that, a spray of sea salt landed on my tongue. I coughed and moved so my back was to the ocean, which meant I’d turned entirely into David.
“You don’t bullshit well.” He shook his head and looked away for a moment as if he were bored with the conversation. Or me. My money was on both. “You know, if you want to go into politics, you’re going to need to clean that up.”
I wrinkled my nose. “Who said I wanted to go into politics?”
David’s gaze settled on my buttoned blazer. “Uh, your matching-set wardrobe. You were born in freshly pressed slacks, weren’t you?”
“I’d rather be over-dressed than under,” I defended, looking him up and down. His blue jeans and thin cotton long-sleeve shirt had seen better days.
“You’ve almost fine-tuned every one of your expressions.”
I frowned. “Excuse me?”
He gestured at my face. “It’s impressive how perfect you look all the time.”
I almost took that as a compliment, forgetting David had the unique skill of turning the nicest things inside out.
“It’s very disingenuous,” he continued. “You’d be a wonderful politician if you learned how to lie better. Tip: stop your right eye from twitching.”
I bit down on my inner cheek, holding back from sharing my knee-jerk retort.
The satisfaction of biting back would keep me fed all week.
But I needed to be more mature than that, at least in front of my org members.
“I’m a lot of things, David. Disingenuous isn’t one of them. You, on the other hand…”
“What?” He tilted his head to the side when I paused. “Oh, come on. Don’t get all shy on me now, Daredevil. What am I? Give me something new this time. Asshole is tired. Jerk’s elementary. I want something you can really sink your teeth into. Something that stabs me right in the soul.”
“Fuck off,” I said under my breath.
“Big, bad Yara’s run out of insults. Another tip to add to your practice sheet: go for the jugular. Debate opponents are ruthless. You know, it’s a good thing you have me around. I’ll get you sharpened up.”
“I have a lot of insults,” I promised. “None of which are appropriate for me to say in front of my org. I respect the people on my team.”
“That so?”
“I do my best to make sure others aren’t uncomfortable in my presence. Can you say the same?”
David whistled long and steadily. “God, it kills me how much you fascinate me. You and all that energy you put into being this version of yourself that you’ve crafted. It’s the one thing I can’t wrap my head around. I can’t understand why it works and why, like everyone else, I’m—”
David stopped himself. I frowned, confused at the abrupt cut-off, but ultimately took advantage of it.
“Person I’ve crafted? What about you?” I asked.
He frowned. “What about me?”
“You’re telling me you’re naturally a nuisance?”
David shrugged. “Some people find their destiny along the way. Others are born with it.”
I laughed. “So you were born to be a pain in the ass? That tracks.”
“Disagreeable,” he corrected with a smile. “I prefer the term disagreeable.”
“Do you like that destiny?” I watched him closely as he responded. We were half joking, but in all of our back and forths, there was always a small inkling of realness. And when I was lucky —which was rare— I could pick through the bullshit to find it.
“It’s fun,” David confirmed. “Getting to rummage through everyone’s genuine emotions is fun.”
My brow furrowed as I considered his words. “Genuine emotions?”
David nudged his chin toward the girls. They were laughing and squealing at their failed attempts to get comfortable on the rocks. “They’re not going to show you who they really are if you’re nice and agreeable all the time. People rarely show you who they truly are unless under pressure.”
“I disagree. I think you can tell a lot about a person in how they respond to kindness.”
He rocked his head back and forth, considering my words. “Maybe. But you learn even more about someone by how they respond to strife.”
I laughed, even though he had a point. I didn’t mean for it to sound like I wasn’t taking him seriously, but from the cloud that appeared across his face, I could tell my intentions didn’t matter.
When David didn’t feel like he was being taken seriously, he sniffed twice. I’m not sure if he knew it was his tell. The first sniff was barely audible. The second sounded like he was trying to fight off a sneeze… or the urge to charge like a bull; the odds were fifty-fifty.
“Your personal philosophy is kind of sad,” I said, my smile fading slightly.
“Yours is sadder.”
“What is mine, exactly?”
“Push and push until you’re bone tired. Smile your way through it all until you get what you want. Fake it till you make it. Play happy until you learn how not to be so sad.”
My smile was gone entirely. David had dug around in my brain, shining a light on all the dark, secret corners. I didn’t know how to disinvite him, so I stood my ground. “I’m not playing happy. I am.”
“Are you?” Another gust of wind blew against us, carrying his scent under my nose. Swirling his presence all around me until it was all I felt and wanted. Fury and desire were an infuriating combination.
“Because I think if you were,” he said. “You’d have told me to fuck off a long time ago. You wouldn’t keep texting me. You wouldn’t have looked for me on campus. You wouldn’t have wasted a dare to invite me today.”
I tried to laugh, but there was no air left in my lungs to breathe it into existence. “I tell you to fuck off every day.”
“Yeah, but have you ever really meant it?” he challenged. “Be honest.”
“Yara!” Emmy called.
I jumped, not ready for how close she’d been behind us. David smiled at my surprise and stepped away from me.
“You ready?” Emmy asked, looking between the two of us. Thankfully, she knew well enough not to ask questions.
I nodded, shaking my hands out as if that were enough to ward off whatever feeling David left in my bones. “Ready.”
“Great.” She bounced on her toes, then directed her next comment to David. “Stop distracting her, yeah? I’m pretty sure you were just invited to carry things and look pretty.”
David winked at her. “Ay, ay, captain. Carrying things and looking pretty is my specialty.”
I rolled my eyes and followed Emmy.
“You good for a little climb?” she asked when we got near the rocks.
“Of course.” I swallowed, having a hard time feeling my toes. “Just tell me which one you think I should go for.”