38. Chapter 38
The knock on her door came just as Francine finished fastening the buttons up the back of Emma’s dress.
She hurried over to answer it, her heart in her throat.
But when she opened the door, it was not Andrew.
Instead, Lucy and Caroline came bustling into the room in a flurry of peach and pale blue skirts.
Their arms were linked, identical smiles wreathed their faces.
“Emma, you must come help us hang decorations. All of the fresh pine boughs that Mother ordered have arrived.”
“Decorations for what?” Emma asked.
“Christmas, silly! It’s at the end of this week,” Caroline admonished.
“What? It can’t be!” She looked from Caroline to Lucy. “How could I have not realized it was almost Christmas?”
Lucy reached out for her hand, giving it a squeeze. “It has been a rough month, with you going to take care of Mama’s ill friend.” She gave her a pointed look. “It’s no wonder you haven’t thought about the holiday.”
“Oh dear, we’d better gather the children and head home this morning. We have baking and shopping to accomplish.”
“No!” both ladies cried out, startling her.
They exchanged an odd look before Caroline continued, “Emma, you all must join us for Christmas. I want to invite Davenport as well. We haven’t had a proper celebration of his and Lucy’s engagement. We’ll have a special Christmas dinner, just the family.”
Lucy’s head bobbed in agreement. “Davenport has no other family besides a few distant cousins. I do so want to see him for Christmas.”
“I insist,” Caroline said.
“Well…” Emma warmed to the idea. Christmas with Andrew and his boys. A proper celebration for Lucy and Davenport. “All right, I accept. If you’re sure this is acceptable to your family? I don’t want us to intrude.”
“Andrew will be so pleased, I’m sure.” Caroline gave her a hug. “Now come down and help us with the decorating. All the children are already downstairs. We’ll have you taken home after teatime.”
Emma allowed herself to be led downstairs.
As they descended the stairs, the smell of pine filled her nose.
There were a dozen servants rushing around in the entrance hall.
Some were twining lengths of ribbon through the staircase railings; some were hanging long boughs above the great front doors.
Many more were gathering fragrant boughs and wreaths and heading off to different sections of the house.
“The family always decorates the main drawing room ourselves. It’s tradition.” Caroline gestured for them to follow her.
When they entered through the door to the drawing room, a cacophony of cheerful sounds assailed them.
Margie was playing “While Shepherds Watch Their Flocks” rather poorly but enthusiastically on the pianoforte.
The noise of children talking and singing mixed with the occasional bark and howl from one of the dogs.
Indeed, the whole family was in attendance.
Max ran over to hug Emma around the legs. His brown eyes danced with excitement. “I am helping with the popcorn chain! And we can eat some while we work. Miss Vivian said it was all right.”
“It looks like fun.” She ran a hand over his soft mop of hair and grinned. “Get back to work.”
Something bumped against her leg, and she automatically reached down to give Fergus a scratch behind his ears. “Have you been keeping watch on all the chaos, boy?”
Caroline led them over to a table. “Let’s begin by cutting lengths of ribbons for making bows. And I’ll explain the method to our madness.”
Vivian already sat at the table, frowning down at a sea of red-and-gold ribbon. She looked up with relief as they approached. “Thank goodness you are here. Caroline, you know I am utterly hopeless at making bows. How I got assigned this task, I do not know!”
They joined her around the table. “Here, you be in charge of cutting.” Caroline handed Vivian a pair of scissors.
“I volunteer to help with cutting also. I have no earthly idea how to make a decent bow.” Emma gave Vivian a wink.
“All right. Lucy, can you help me with bows?”
Lucy nodded her head. “Certainly.”
Chatter around the table turned to what foods were favored for Christmas dinner. As the menu was discussed, Emma observed the room. Her eyes immediately found Andrew, standing in front of the fireplace with his younger son sitting on his shoulders.
“A little higher on the left, right there. What do you think, Tyler?”
“I think it still looks crooked,” the boy replied.
There was a groan from Jack, who was standing on a ladder adjusting the giant wreath. “You two, make up your mind,” he grumbled as he adjusted the wreath a bit to the right.
“Yes, perfect,” Andrew proclaimed. He hefted Tyler down, giving the boy a kiss before setting his son on the floor. Then he turned and gave her a wide smile when he spotted her.
Emma’s heart fluttered in response. Looking down, she cut another length of red ribbon. This man loved so easily. A kiss to his son, teasing banter with his brother. Even after years of unhappiness and betrayal, the death of his wife, the struggle to get sober, he still wasn’t afraid to love.
“Isn’t that true, Emma?” Lucy interrupted her thoughts.
Emma shifted her attention to her sister. “Sorry, I missed that.”
“I said we always hang stockings by the fire.”
“Uh, yes, the children love it,” she said. Her eyes drifted back to Andrew.
He walked over to a table set with refreshments, poured a glass of lemonade and brought it over to his mother.
The duchess sat in an armchair, stringing popcorn and dried cranberries.
Around her, most of the children had gathered on the floor, making their own strands.
They listened to her tell a story about how in Germany, St. Nicholas filled children’s shoes with treats.
Sunlight poured into the room today, pooling around the group.
Lady Gilchrest occasionally reached down to help the smaller boys push the needle through a particularly hard berry or gently admonish the girls for eating too much popcorn.
The duchess accepted the lemonade from Andrew, patting her son’s hand affectionately.
Then she reached into a basket next to her chair and pulled out a round ball of mistletoe and pointed across the room.
“I think over in front of the entrance. Hang it from the ceiling. The nail should still be there from last year.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Andrew gave a small bow before he leaned in to buss her cheek.
Emma’s scissors froze in mid-snip. Her mind scrambled to catch up to what her heart already knew. This man was not going to hurt her or leave her. He had invited her to be part of his circle of loved ones, repeatedly. Why was she still afraid to take a chance and say yes?
A sense of calm settled over her, and she set her scissors down. She knew the answer. She wasn’t afraid anymore. She rose to her feet. The other ladies looked up quizzically, but she ignored them. All she could see was Andrew.
Andrew hung the ball of mistletoe from the ceiling. Giving it a small tug, he was satisfied that it wouldn’t fall off. A rustle of skirts had him glancing down. Emma stood at the base of the ladder, her beautiful face upturned and very serious.
“Emma, you look lovely this morning. Are you wanting a kiss under the mistletoe?” he teased her. “I’m happy to oblige.”
Emma shook her head. “No.”
“No?” He began to climb down the ladder.
“No. I want so much more.”
He froze, one foot still on the second rung.
Around them, shouting from the boys rang out.
Lord Pettigrew raced by at full speed with a chain of popcorn in his mouth.
The children all got to their feet to join in pursuit.
Then the other dogs, wanting to get into the game, barked and raced by the ladder as well.
Emma didn’t move, never broke eye contact with him. It was as though the whole world had shrunk down to just the two of them. All the chaos in the room became a blur.
Her chest rose and fell as she took in a deep breath. “Andrew, your love has changed everything for me. The courage with which you love despite your battered heart amazes me. I didn’t think I was worthy of it.” Her eyes grew watery.
He quickly stepped to the floor and took hold of one of her hands, bringing it to his lips. Overwhelmed, he shook his head in denial. It was he who was floored by her courage to continue on after the abuses she had endured.
Her shoulders straightened. “I want more than what I thought I deserved. I want to be your wife. I want to wake up next to you each morning for the rest of my life. I want to dance with you, and laugh with you, and raise all these children together, and maybe a few more. It’s been difficult to have the courage to trust in love.
For me to take a chance with my heart. But I am finished with being afraid to reach for happiness.
” She took a step closer and placed her hand over his heart.
“I love you. You make me indescribably happy. Andrew Blakely Langdon, will you marry me?”
Her words washed over him, rushing into that small corner of his heart where he’d still believed maybe he had been mistaken about her feelings for him.
“Yes.” He pressed his lips to hers. He slid his arms around her to bring her close, trapping her hand against the beat of his heart.
She pulled back her head slightly, a line of worry creasing her brow. “Are you sure? An uncle in prison, four more children, and don’t forget all the dogs…”
Andrew interrupted her with another swift kiss. “Yes,” he murmured against her mouth. “My answer is yes.”
He knew this woman would need reassurance she had made the right decision to trust him. He was happy to oblige her every day for the rest of their lives. He spoke softly, his forehead resting against hers as he stared into her golden-brown eyes.
“For much of the last year, I was mired in anger and guilt. Then you climbed through my window. From that moment, my life would never be the same. I had resigned myself to a life of duty, taking care of my sons, taking care of my estates. You and your family have brought vitality and laughter back into my life…into our lives,” he corrected.
“I’ve realized my boys need me to be more than just present.
They need me to show them how to live life after tragedy.
We welcome all the chaos, energy, the love you all bring.
I love you, Emma Whittingham. I vow to love and care for you, your siblings, and all the crazy dogs you wish to have, for as long as I live. ”
Her eyes shone with unshed tears as he captured her trembling lips.
No amount of words could express his happiness at this moment.
He could only let it pour out into that kiss.
Emma’s eyes fluttered closed, and her whole body melted against him.
He’d finally managed to capture her trust and with it, her elusive heart.