Chapter 24 Sierra #2
He studies my face for a moment, then takes hold of my hand. For some reason, he doesn’t look elated to hear it. He looks worried.
Which just makes me worry. I’m practically vibrating, and I wonder if he can feel it.
“If you need time or space to think about things,” he says gently, “to think about what you want, I understand. I don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want.
I just really want you to know, no matter what happens between us, that I know I was wrong.
The way I picked a fight with you as soon as I found out you’d leased Pier Seven .
. . I made you feel unwelcome. I pressured you to leave town.
I accused you of conspiring with June, trying to manipulate me, and so many shitty things. ”
He rubs his forehead, peers up at me.
I lift an eyebrow, like, Go on.
“I’m sorry,” he says seriously. “You deserve an apology. Because you didn’t deserve any of that.
Not only were you not guilty of anything I accused you of, you’re kind.
And hard-working. And sweet and lovely and amazing, and you deserved the building and the lease, and all the support you got from June and the community. You should’ve had mine, too.”
I take a deep breath, my heart lifting with a rush of pure joy as this new sensation fills me with warmth. Acceptance.
“Honestly,” I tell him, “that was all I ever wanted from you in the beginning, Mason. To be welcome in your town. It was hard enough for me to even be there at first.”
“I know,” he says, and I can see the deep remorse in his eyes. “I know that now. I just made it worse. And I’m so fucking sorry. I wish I could go back and kick my own ass.”
I laugh a little. “Why didn’t you tell me you were sorry before I left town? It would’ve been nice to hear.”
“Because I didn’t think it would change anything.
” He sighs. “Maybe I tried to convince myself it didn’t matter.
But that was cowardly and fucking selfish.
I think . . . Fuck. I think I’ve just been afraid of people leaving me, ever since I was left at the altar.
And it’s made it harder for me to take risks. Like telling you how I really feel.”
I feel his fear when he says those words, and I know this can’t be easy to admit.
“I’m so sorry that happened to you.” Tentatively, I ask, “Tell me about it?” Because I want to know everything there is to know about him, and it’s obvious that event shaped him somehow.
He takes a deep breath and kind of sighs.
“Okay. If you want to know . . . I met Jennifer in high school. After we graduated, I moved to Victoria with her because she was going to university there. I did some business college, worked in restaurants, all with the plan to return to Orchard Cove and work at the bar. Eventually, I’d take over managing it so my dad could focus on the cidery.
I’d always planned to join the family business, and Jenn knew that from the day we met. That plan never changed. Not for me.”
He looks out toward the water. “We got engaged the second year we were in Victoria, and we even planned to have the wedding there because that’s what she wanted.
All her family and mine came down for it.
” He looks down at our joined hands, and I rub my thumb gently over his skin.
“I could see her trembling as she walked up the aisle in her white dress, and I think I just knew. But I didn’t want to know, you know? ”
He meets my eyes. “Obviously, she walked away. And afterwards we had a long talk, and she told me she didn’t want to come home. She didn’t want to live in Orchard Cove forever. But I still did.”
He pauses, rubbing his forehead. Then he looks at me, and I can see all the fear piling up behind his eyes.
The pain—that the one place he wants to live could mean that he has to live his life alone.
“I think in some ways that felt like the biggest betrayal of all. Because all those years, she let me believe that she wanted the same life I did, when she didn’t.”
“Maybe she did,” I say gently. “For a while.”
“Yeah. But at some point she decided she wanted something else, and she didn’t tell me. But hey, at least she didn’t fake it and marry me and then tell me later, right?”
I draw closer to him, until we’re almost pressed together. “Mason . . . that’s heartbreaking. But maybe it’s better that she stopped the wedding from happening.”
“Yeah. Way better, for sure. But it really fucked with my sense of trust. I returned to Orchard Cove with my family to live the life I always wanted, but things had changed for me. I became this staunch bachelor with these rigid beliefs about dating and relationships. I didn’t even want to date anymore.
I just preferred to stay single and have casual, no-strings-attached flings, mostly with tourists who came and went. ”
I don’t say a word. Because even though it hurts to hear this, to think that I could have been one of those flings, I appreciate that he’s being honest with me.
“I let that breakup turn me into this resentful, jaded, self-protective person. And last year, when my parents died . . .” He gets choked up a bit.
“I think it made me close right up and just say fuck it. The idea of getting attached to anyone new just felt . . . too risky.” He stops there, and I instinctively loop my arms around his waist.
He wraps his arms around me, too.
“But then you came along.” He looks down into my eyes. “And you, Sierra, are exactly what I needed.”
“I am?” I say in wonder.
He chuckles softly. “Yes. Hell, yes. You’re fun when I’m serious.
You’re light when I’m heavy. And I think you are extremely, unfairly beautiful.
And sexy. And fascinating. You stood up to me, and you held your ground.
You weren’t afraid to be who you are, no matter what anyone in Orchard Cove thought. I admire that.”
“Oh, but I am afraid.”
He smiles a little and brushes a lock of my hair off my face, studying me with affection.
“In some ways, you are my total opposite. And in some ways, we are weirdly alike. And any way you want to look at it, you knocked me on my ass when I least expected it. When I honestly wouldn’t have thought it would be possible for any woman to do that.
You lit a fire under me, and you made me want to fight for something again. ”
“I know,” I say shakily, so many emotions cascading through me as he says all these lovely things about me. “Pier Seven.”
“I’m not talking about that damn building, Sierra.”
I sniffle, dangerously close to crying, barely daring to believe that he’s saying what I think he’s saying. “You’re not?”
Mason shakes his head slowly. “I should’ve told you sooner. I should’ve told you that I wanted you to be mine.”
“You did?”
“Fuck, yes. I do. I should’ve told you that if we’re together, I’ll never abandon you. I know that has to be a sore spot for you, because it is for me, too.”
“Oh my god. And I left while you were sleeping.” I drop my forehead to his chest. “How could I do that to you?”
He slips a finger under my chin and lifts my face to look into my eyes. His lips quirk with amusement. “I forgive you. But don’t do it again.”
“Okay.” My cheeks warm as I blush a little. “The brutal truth is . . . I wasn’t really thinking about you when I did it. I was just protecting myself. Getting the hell out of there before I could get hurt. But it already hurt. Leaving you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”
“Then come back with me.” He takes a deep breath, his chest rising and falling against me. “We could have a life there, together. I know we can, because I keep fantasizing about it. Picturing us together, in my family home, listening to music and making each other laugh.”
I blink away the pesky tears that keep quivering in my eyes. “What a beautiful picture.”
“It is. And I don’t expect you to just drop everything, give up your whole life for me.
I understand you have a life here, in the city.
” He looks out at the view. “I can’t compete with this, if this is what you want.
” Then he looks deep into my eyes again.
He cups my face in his hands. “But I can give you a place to call home. And a place to run your business.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve been talking to Layne about it. And there’s no reason we can’t find a permanent home for Cutie Fruitie in Orchard Cove.
But best-case scenario . . . I really think you can help me fix things with June.
She likes you. And I understand now that she’ll never go into business with me the way things are.
But she might with my grandpa, under the right circumstances. ”
“Really?” A spark of hope and curiosity ignites in my chest.
“I think we can convince her to open a restaurant with us, because you were right. Layne thinks that June and our grandpa have more going on between them than either one of them wants to admit. And if anyone can convince those two cranky old cynics to take a chance, I think it’s two young fools in love. ”
I blink at him, my heart thrumming. “In love?”
“Yeah,” he says softly. “In love.”
I’m kind of speechless.
Is it actually possible that he really feels about me the way I feel about him?
What does it feel like when your dreams come true?
I don’t know. I’ve never been here before.
Mason’s brow crinkles. “Are you okay?”
“I’m having a moment.”
He looks concerned.
“I’ll be okay. I think.”
“Look, I want to show you something.” He pulls a sheet of paper from his back pocket and unfolds it.
“This is a plan my parents drew up for their proposed renovations of Pier Seven, back when they were in talks with June about buying it from her. I modified it, a few days ago, to include your smoothie bar.”