33. Callie
Callie
FRIDAY, OCTOBER 3RD
I pedal as fast as my legs will let me, grateful that my ankle has almost fully recovered but also wishing I had more physical pain to distract me.
I know where I’m going, though. One of the first places I visited in town: The Heavy Petting Zoo. It’s part of the Two in the Bush campgrounds along with Birdie in the Hole, and my weird-animal loving heart is full here. Between the cornhole tournament practice, teaching, and the Dirty Hookers, I haven’t been by in quite a while, so I’m disappointed to see that most of the fenced-off areas are empty when I ride in.
I prop my bike up on its kickstand and cross the dirt path to the fence. Then I lean on it with both forearms and continue the cry that I started back on the course.
“God, I’m a mess.”
I wasn’t expecting a response, but I get one. A tiny squeak, almost like a bird chirping, followed by the rustle of dirt. I look down, and in front of me behind the fence is the craziest animal I’ve ever seen—and I have a ferret.
It looks kind of like a mini kangaroo with the skinniest front legs known to man.
“What are you?” I gasp and wipe away a tear from my eye.
The animal looks up at me, grunts, and then looks down at my hands.
“Ohhh. You’re hungry. I’m sorry, little buddy, but I don’t have any snacks.”
“PB, leave her alone. I’m the one with the food.”
I turn to see a thin woman with a blonde pixie cut strolling through the gate. She’s holding a tub of grass and gets rushed by PB and a couple of other kangaroo-rat-birds I didn’t even know were in there.
The woman looks over at me. “Do you want to come help me feed them?”
“Oh my god, yes.” I jump up and head around to the gate, where she lets me in.
“You must be Callie,” she says, pointing at my hair. “I don’t think we’ve officially met yet. I’m Nix.” She balances the tub of grass on her hip with one hand and reaches the other out to shake mine.
“You’re the owner,” I state, noting her ridiculously firm grip. “I’ve heard a lot about you, it’s so nice to finally meet you.”
She gives me a friendly smile and a nod before turning her attention back to the animals. “I’m just getting these guys a bedtime snack before they turn in for the night. Here…” She gives me a handful of grass from the tub.
I crouch down and hold out my palms, and two of the three little guys eagerly dive in. “What even are these?”
“Patagonian cavies,” she replies. “They’re related to guinea pigs.”
I look to the side where the third cavy has shown interest now that I have food, although it still seems pretty hesitant. “Hey, sweetie,” I coo. “It’s okay, I won’t hurt, I promise.”
“She’s new,” Nix says. “We got her from a rescue in Boston…someone thought they could have her as a dorm-room pet but didn’t do their homework first.”
I look up at her. “Um, these don’t really seem like apartment-friendly animals.”
“That’s because they’re definitely not. I’m actually looking for a partner for her. PB and J here are already paired up, she just needs a mate of her own.”
“Poor thing.” Determined now to help this little transplant, I set some grass down on the ground and scoot away a bit. She seems much more willing to approach that way, and she cautiously hops over.
I grab another handful of grass and lay my palm flat on the ground. After a little more coaxing, she feels safe enough to come up to me.
“Mmm, that’s tasty, huh?” I smile.
“She likes you,” Nix observes. “So far I’m the only person she’s come up to.”
“She’s so sweet. What’s her name?”
“Jack Daniel’s.”
I stop. “What?”
Nix just scrunches up her nose and shakes her head. “Like I said. Dorm room.”
“Gross, that can’t be her name.” I peek back at my new fuzzy friend. “We can’t call you that, can we, sweet girl?”
“Do you want to re-name her?” Nix chuckles.
I gasp. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah, sure. It’s not like you could do any worse. Piper wanted me to put it up in the Pecker for a town vote, but they could do worse so that’s not happening.”
She hands me some more grass and I continue feeding the animal I shall never address as Jack Daniel’s. “You’re doing so well, you’re so brave! You’re a brave cavy, yes you are. A bravy cavy. If you had hair, it’d be wavy. Mashed potatoes and gravy.” First grade has clearly rubbed off on me.
But at the word “gravy,” she tilts her head slightly and stares at me. I can’t help but laugh. “How in the hell do you acknowledge that and not the other words I just said? Bravy. Cavy. Wavy. Gravy.”
Again, she scoots a little closer on “gravy,” although, to be fair, I think she’s just looking for more grass.
“Huh,” Nix shrugs. “Gravy it is. We’ll just keep going with the food theme. Come on, Gravy, time for bed.” She clicks her tongue and leads the trio into their enclosure, locking the little door behind them.
“So you’re not from here, right? Originally?” I stand up and brush the dust off my legs, following her out of the cavy’s area and walking towards a nearby picnic table.
“I’m not,” she confirms. She sets the tub of grass down on the ground and hoists herself up to sit on the table, resting her feet on the bench. I follow suit and sit beside her. “I actually left home right after graduation. Just me and my RV, living at campgrounds all over the U.S.”
“Seriously? That sounds amazing.” I’m dying to ask her why she left home and how the hell she ended up with an RV at that age, but it’s rude to pry.
“It was amazing, actually. I mean, you know how that is, right? I hear you’re no stranger to nomadic life.”
“I may or may not get the itch to pull up stakes and move on every year or two, yeah. But I’ve never gotten to do it in an RV. Why did you decide to settle down here?” I ask. Although I’m pretty sure I can guess; she’s dating Piper’s brother, Thayer, and he’s seemed really sweet the few times I’ve talked to him.
She knows what I’m thinking and grins in response. “Thayer is a big part of it, yeah. He’s amazing. And so is Piper, honestly. But I think at the end of the day, I probably would have stayed here anyway.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I’ve lived in a lot of places that I’ve loved. But I don’t know…this is the first place that really loved me back.”
The distant lights of glowing golf blur, as tears well up. This is so embarrassing, but I can’t seem to help it. Maybe she won’t notice since it’s dark now.
My traitorous body instead forces me into a simultaneous sob-inhale and snot-sniffle. It’s so loud, I think the people in Robin Springs heard it.
I keep looking forward, but from the corner of me eye, I can see Nix glance over at me.
“So you were just at the golf course, right?” she asks, kindly not mentioning my turn as a slime monster.
“Uh, yeah.” I wipe my wet face with the hem of my shirt. Like a lady. “Final battle in the War of the Wild Turkeys. It’s, a, uh?—”
“Oh, Piper told me all about it. She got borderline cartoon villain over it, honestly.”
“Sounds about right.”
“Did you win?”
I take a deep breath. “No. No, I definitely lost tonight.”
She shrugs. “There’s always next time.”
“I don’t know if there’s going to be a next time.”
“Well, that sounds dramatic.”
I chuckle. “I’m good with dramatic. It’s why I was great as a middle school teacher.”
“So why wouldn’t there be a next time? Different teachers fighting next year?”
“Um, I don’t know.”
“Is Finnegan still pissed that you throat punched him over at Nick’s place?”
I wince. “I don’t think so.”
“But he’s pissed about something.” It isn’t a question.
I fidget with the edge of my gross shirt. “Maybe a little.”
“I’m guessing it’s that teaching job you haven’t officially accepted yet.”
“Jesus, Piper might be worse than The Nosy Pecker .”
“She definitely is. And now we’re getting somewhere. So why haven’t you taken the job?”
I draw in a deep breath. “I don’t know.”
At that, she turns to look at me and I don’t avoid her glance this time. But maybe I should have because it’s full of judgment. “Seriously? That’s the answer you’re going with?”
“I don’t know!” I protest again.
“Yes, you do. And I know you know because I knew when it was me, even though I thought I didn’t know. You know?”
“I think so?”
Nix looks at me again, expecting a better answer than the one I gave her last time.
And she scares me a little so I decide it’s best to be honest. “I…I’ve never had to do this before. I just always moved around on my own terms and made friends along the way. But never relationships like this. If I leave, it might hurt people I care about, but they’ll be able to heal if I’m not around. If I stay…then I’ll just keep fucking up and hurting them over and over again.”
She nods in thought for a moment. “You know that’s just what normal people do, right? Fuck up?”
“I mean, yeah, but?—”
“Of course you’re going to make mistakes. And listen, I have heard enough about Leo Finnegan to know he isn’t all squeaky clean, so I guarantee he’ll make more mistakes than you. But so what? You work through it, you move forward.”
“But it’s not just me and Finn, it’s everyone here.”
“Callie, half the town is sporting a purple streak in their hair right now because of you. ‘Swallowers come together’ isn’t just a wildly inappropriate town slogan.”
I choke out a small laugh at that.
“So get your shit together,” she bumps my shoulder with hers and moves to grab the grass tub. “I’ve got to finish closing up here, are you gonna be okay?”
“Yeah, thank you. I appreciate it. I’m really glad we finally met.”
“Me, too. Come back anytime. Gravy will miss you.”
The crunch of the dirt and gravel beneath her feet gets quieter as she retreats, and I take a moment alone to reflect on everything she just said.
“Hey, Mom. I, uh, I know I don’t talk as much to you as I used to. I’m sorry about that. I’m sure Dad tells you everything, anyway. I hope you’re finally happy now. I think…maybe it’s time for me to be happy, too.”