Chapter 46
I hit the road early to head back toward the city.
I wanted to try to find Scooter because I hadn’t heard from him in the last couple of days.
The thought of NTR getting a hold of him and doing him dirty played in my head.
Hell, even the idea of him getting locked up again and my father doing him the same as Leek ran through my mind.
With my birthday around the corner, a lot of shit was happening at once.
I figured this year I would find peace, but at the rate shit was going, I knew that day would be just what it was, another day.
With each birthday, I’ve tried to find a form of solace.
I even tried wrapping my mind around trying to forgive those who betrayed me, but a part of me felt like I had betrayed others, and I wasn’t so deserving of any peace.
There was so much harbored inside me. The secrets, lies, guilt, anger, sadness, passion, and the love that wanted to bleed from me were stuck.
I knew if I allowed myself to be free, I would no longer have control of anything.
It would be all fair in love and war. It was as if the death of Braylen declared war on the world of Beans.
The battle between the two had become so strong that in a moment of true beast fashion, Braylen tried to reign supreme.
He tried to pour everything he had between Paige’s thighs.
The thought of her sweet, creamy center lingered in my brain.
There was so much more I wanted to explore with her, but before I could do that, there were things she needed to know.
However, with the pressure of Chevy on my back, trying to help Scooter find a little happiness and my parents, she would have to wait.
When a call came through from my Pops, I considered declining, but I answered. “Dad,” I called out.
“Braylen, are you too busy to come hang with your pops, or do you have some time?” he asked.
The answer should have been that I was too busy, but it had been a minute since I’d seen him.
My father had his moments in which he tried to make up for the worst days of my life, but I was already detached.
I’ll never forget my senior year of college when they cut me off for not doing what they wanted me to do.
Instead of asking them for a fucking dime, I used the one thing I knew I was good at besides music to survive.
I’ve hustled until I got where I am, and they knew it was nothing they could offer me to pull me into their web of deceit.
I took a quick detour near Lake Hill to catch up with my dad.
When I reached the Country Club, I noticed everyone's gaze turned towards me.
Even though most members recognized me, it was my style and locs that caught their attention.
I strolled casually through the club and out the back to find my father, who was standing there with a gin and tonic.
He raised an eyebrow and his glass when he saw me. “Son.”
“Dad,” I replied.
He took a sip of his drink before he pointed to the Caddie who held a bag on each shoulder full of golf clubs. “Do you remember the game?” my dad asked.
I walked over to the caddie, taking one of the bags off his shoulders, “I’ve never forgotten.”
This was the life he wanted for me, but it wasn’t what I wanted. My father and I started at the first hole. He stared at me curiously as he removed a club from the bag. “Your birthday is in a few days. What are your plans?” he asked.
“I don’t have any.”
He teed the ball as he let off a chuckle. “Good. Come to the house for dinner. You and me, like the good ole days.”
The ball flew into the air, making a single drop. “You didn’t make that shit. You're not even close. Also, those good days you speak of never existed,” I told him as I pulled a club from the bag.
I crouched down and eyed the ball. “Tell me, Dad, how can a parent who exists in the home be non-existent?” I said as I slowly lifted and swung the club in practice before connecting with the ball, swatting it just enough to bounce off the grass, roll four inches to the left, and land in the hole.
I turned to look at him, and I could tell he had no words. “Just as I thought,” I said.
He closed his eyes briefly. “How can I make up for it. Your mother and I are trying. We really need to talk.”
I cut my eyes at him. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
My father moved closer, placing his hand on my shoulder.
“Braylen, I need you to give me a chance to explain. Every time I try, you shut me out. When did you become like this? This angry person. It’s almost as if I don’t know who you are.
Maybe your mother was right. Those Zoo folks are changing you.
Like this June Calloway. Do you know his story?
Do you know where he came from? Diamond Blanco?
What about him? All of them have a past that I don’t think you should be a part of.
It won’t be long until the crew turns their back on you. ”
People always wanted to know why I had become so cold, and the answer was my parents. The word control stuck out like a sore thumb, and anybody who thought they could control even a piece of me had me fucked up, and that was something I stood on.
“Just like you and Ma did,” I finished as I walked off.
As soon as I got to my car, my phone rang with an unknown number. I was reluctant to answer, but I thought about Scooter. “Yo!” I called out.
“Nigga, Beans, it’s me, Scooter.”
I nodded. “Man, I’ve been calling you. Where are you at?”
“Uh, yo’, what’s this address?” he asked someone in the background.
I could hear mumbling, then the person said a street name, one that was very familiar.
Once he told me the house numbers, I sped off.
The drive from the country club to that side of the Cove was about forty minutes, and when I turned onto the street, that feeling emerged.
I pulled up to the address I knew all too well.
2016 Loch Ness Dr.