CHAPTER 11
PRESENT DAY
“Jesus Christ,” she muttered to herself, slinging her carryon bag high over her shoulder while dragging her large rolling suitcase behind her.
She found her way to the baggage claim area and waited for her remaining bags, hoping her chauffeur would magically appear any second because she knew she wouldn’t be able to carry all of her bags by herself.
The heartbreak of losing Tristan had left her frozen in depression for months before her mom had literally forced her out of bed and out of her room, and before she knew it, she was on a plane to Texas Tech, which was honestly a dream come true, since their journalism school was highly accredited.
And from there she buried herself either in her books or her guitar.
She made a few friends, wrote obscene amounts of peer reviewed journals and obsessed about building up her resume for when she finally graduated.
Tessa dated a few guys, most of them casual, until Joseph.
She had met him when she first moved to NYC years ago.
He was British, and tall, and charming, and very smart.
He had re-lit a spark within her that she hadn’t felt since Tristan, and although the spark that Tristan ignited was a full-blown forest fire and Joseph’s was a humble little stick fire, it at least kept her warm and out of the darkness.
Until that cozy fire started to dim and shrink, and suddenly it was chilly and getting darker by the second.
And the owner of said fire, Joseph, didn’t care to put any extra logs to bring the fire back to life.
And that was how Tessa found herself single, again, at 30 years old.
She had thought she’d be married with a kid or two by now, but she instead found herself alone in an unfamiliar city, fresh off a breakup from a man who had the enthusiasm for life and love of a wet blanket, and still thinking of her ex after 10 whole fucking years.
An ex who, by the way, seemed to have the entirety of Kansas City in a choke hold.
“Miss Smith?”
Tessa looked up at the very kind older gentleman before her, whose smile was warm and eyes were gentle.
“Are you my ride?” She asked with a sparkling smile, and he immediately melted under her blue eyes.
“Yes ma’am, my name is Mark and I’ll be taking you to your residence.” he said with a light tone, “Are these all of your bags?”
“No, I’m waiting for two more. Oh! There they are.”
Mark was a textbook gentleman and took care of the largest of Tessa’s bags, walking her briskly through the airport until they got outside to the awaiting SUV. He opened her door, put her bags away, and offered her water once he got into the driver’s seat.
“You ever been to KC?” he asked, glancing back at her over his shoulder. She relaxed into the back seat, grateful to be off that stuffy airplane and the chaos of the airport.
“No, first time,” she said softly. “I’ll be staying for a few months.”
“Well, lucky you. You’re in the greatest place on earth.”
“Is that so?” She asked with a teasing smile. “I’m coming from New York City, you know.”
He only smiled and scoffed at her. “Can’t even compare! Our people, our food, our teams, it’s all the best.”
Tessa giggled and crossed her arms comfortably, watching the lush greenery begin to show itself from the highway. “Well, where can I go to get good food?”
“You’re going to want to try all the barbeque you can,” he said instantly, “I’ve actually got a folder up here for you that has a bunch of details about food and night life and things to do. You’ll never be bored. What brings you out here anyway?”
Tessa paused for a moment and considered his question.
For a minute, their conversation had diverted her attention from the fact that she would be face to face with her first love whom she ran away from with her tail between her legs a decade ago.
Her face got hot from the reality of what she was about to walk into.
“I’m um…a journalist and I’m supposed to be writing an expose on the Titans.”
“No shit,” he said, his eyebrows shooting to his hairline in surprise. He looked at her through the review mirror. “Do you get to meet them?”
“Yes,” she breathed the word heavily. “I’ll actually be spending quite a lot of time with them.”
“Alright well I want autographs,” he said with a mischievous smile but serious tone. “Kelly and Matthews. On their jerseys.”
Her heart skipped again at the mention of Tristan.
“I’ll get right on that,” she said with a smile.
That night, Tessa sat alone on the couch of her rented townhome.
It was in a high rise on the Kansas, Missouri border.
It was sleek and modern. Comfortable enough but devoid of any kind of character or coziness.
She liked her space to feel lived in and somewhat eclectic, and this place did not reflect that at all.
But she was grateful her team had found her something safe and even a touch luxurious.
It would be more than fine, but it did add to the fact that she was completely alone out here.
Brinley had tried to reach out several times throughout the day, but Tessa had yet to return any texts or calls.
She just simply wasn’t ready. She loved Brinley and remembered her well from when they were roommates.
Brinley was high energy and bubbly and go go go.
And Tessa could be like that too, but right now she was far from it.
Right now, she was tired, and emotional, and painfully uncertain about how this was all going to play out.
So instead of answering Brinley’s calls and letting her drag her out to some kind of Kansas City club scene to celebrate her arrival, she was eating a to-go order of ribs and mac and cheese from a local restaurant alone on her couch.
The food was delicious, the couch was comfortable, the twinkling lights of downtown shining brightly through her window was enchanting and charming.
But instead of feeling any semblance of happiness, she was sick to her stomach with anxiety.
Would he say hi to her? Ignore her? Does he hate her? Still love her? She was simply going crazy with all the uncertainty. And as if right on fucking queue, her mom called.
“How in the hell do you always know when I’m a wreck?” Tessa asked into the phone.
“Because I grew you in my body,” Allison said without skipping a beat. “You and I share a heart and a soul. Same with your brother.”
“It’s more fun to believe you’re a witch.”
“What’s going on? You unpacked?”
“Yeah,” Tessa said, pulling her feet up onto the couch and taking a small bite of the cookie she ordered with dinner.
It was delicious, but her stomach was in knots from anxiety, and she put it down as quickly as she picked it up.
“Almost everything unpacked, but I’m so nervous about tomorrow.
I’m not sure I’ve ever been this nervous in my life, how pathetic is that? ”
“Not pathetic at all,” Allison answered with a stern tone.
“What you’re walking into is frankly something you never recovered from.
You’ve ignored it for 10 years. Stuffed it down.
Busied yourself with anything you could so your mind didn’t drift into his world for even a second.
And now here you are, unexpectedly about to face him and he has no idea. ”
“I thought you called to make me feel better,” Tessa said dryly, “You’re adding to my anxiety.”
“I’m simply validating what you’re feeling and also letting you know that if anyone can face this head on, it’s you.”
“Maybe I should just go back to NYC. Tell my team I’m not doing it and find another publication.”
“Tessa you have got to stop running!” Allison’s exasperated voice put a dagger through Tessa’s heart.
“I did not raise you this way! You are strong and brilliant and capable. This is a huge opportunity. You should be honored they want you to profile such a highly successful subject like this. Your publication will get more attention than you’ve ever dreamed of simply because of how big of a deal this team is.
Now grab this issue by the horns and face it head on! ”
“God damnit,” Tessa sighed. “Fine.”
“Don’t let some boy take away your dreams.”
“I’m not,” she said defiantly. “But he’s also not just some boy.”
“I know honey,” Allison’s tone was softer now. “He meant a lot to you, you’ve been trying to find the same spark ever since, you guys broke off your relationship with very intense feelings for each other okay, I get it. I totally understand why you’re feeling this way.”
“But?” She asked, waiting for her mom’s rebuttal.
“But you’re better than this. I want you to wake up tomorrow morning, put on your most perfect outfit, and stand in front of him like the confident woman I know you are.”
“Okay. Thanks mom.”
“And no wine tonight! Don’t want Tristan seeing you for the first time with the hangover shakes.”
“Ugh, why do you always know what I’m about to do before I do it!”
“I already explained that to you. Love you my girl. Call me tomorrow with an update.”
Tessa said her I love yous to her mom and spent the rest of the evening staring at the bottle of wine she so desperately wanted to obliterate and going over in her head what her first words to him would be. Needless to say, she didn’t sleep much that night.
Tristan sat in the auditorium at 8:00am sharp, sandwiched between Phillip and Chris, another teammate.
His black coffee was scalding hot, his donuts soft and fluffy, and his adrenaline at an all-time high.
It was their first practice of the season.
They had already completed camp and were getting ready for their preseason games.
The regular season was just about to start, and they were hot off a Super Bowl win, and Tristan wanted another one so bad he was ready to kill for it.
“Oh nice, donuts,” Phil said, taking one of Tristan’s donuts before he could even realize what was happening.