Chapter Thirty-Seven
janae
Austin
June 17
“Turn this corner and go up the hill. My house is on the end,” I directed Landon. The beautiful hills and winding roads trickled calmness over my still-angry heart. We’d been in this car together for a little over twenty-seven hours, with traffic, restroom, food, and gas stops. We’d driven without a night in a hotel.
“I finally get to hear your voice again.” He smiled.
I poked his cheek. “Bet you didn’t like the quiet this time.”
“I didn’t. I’ve grown accustomed to your noises and your mouth.” He squinted. “Is that your house?”
I nodded, suddenly self-conscious. Landon came from money, and my ranch-style home was nestled in the woods of Austin. I was proud of this house that a poor Black girl from the Third Ward had chosen on her own. No one had seen it but me and the management team, who’d kept it up in my absence.
“This is nice,” he said as he pulled into the driveway. “Can’t wait to see inside.”
“You like it?” I asked, pleased with his smile. “Never know with a city boy like you.”
He tilted his head. “I should’ve agreed to come here with you when you first asked. I feel the peace already. I needed this, too.”
The house had been aired out and fully stocked after I placed a call on the way here. The front door opened to a large living space, and from the entrance, you could see the courtyard and the woods beyond. Landon seemed immediately drawn to the twilight sky, walking across the room and out to the courtyard, where he stared at the stars.
“I can even see Mercury.” He pointed in the distance behind the peeking full moon, sounding like an excited boy. “Austin was the first city I remembered seeing a sparkling sky in where I could also identify planets with the naked eye.”
Watching him admire the galaxy, I wanted to jump up and down. Austin had been the right decision for us. I joined him in the courtyard. It had been designed with a fireplace in the corner for cold nights and was partially blocked from the sun on hot days. “This is my favorite part of the house and the reason I bought it.”
He wrapped his arms around me and tucked his head near my ear. “You did good. I would’ve definitely helped you keep this if you couldn’t afford to anymore.”
I bumped my head slightly against his chest. “You can’t talk like we this couple… just to take it back tomorrow because something I do upsets you. I’m human, and I’ll make mistakes, just like you will.”
Landon’s arms tightened around me. “Then let’s use this time to decide if we can be together or not. There are no cameras, no band, no tour staff, and no fans. Just you. Just me.”
I tilted my head to see his handsome face. “That’s all I ever wanted, a chance to show you all I am, because I can only be me.”
“And I’ve come to the realization I can be a better me.” Landon suddenly picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder. I squealed in surprise as he carried me back inside. “Where’s your bedroom? We need to shower and then sleep. I’m exhausted.”
“I’m still mad at you. Put me down.” I actually loved the way he handled me, though I pretended to be bothered. “I’m not tired. I don’t want to go to bed.”
“Then watch me sleep.” He pushed open the double doors to the primary bedroom and placed me on my feet in the bathroom. “Is your shower voice controlled?”
“No. It’s just like my shower in my condo, Mr. Bougie.”
Landon flipped the nozzles on, and the four showerheads sprayed water. He tugged me to him by my wrist. “Take your anger out on me in the shower.”
Unwilling to give in to him, though my body yearned for his, I quirked a brow and touched his hair.
He grinned before he pulled off his shirt, reminding me why he’d become known as one of the hottest men in the country.
“I’m still trying to understand why you’ve been hiding all this.” I reached for the button on his pants.
He leaned down and captured my lips. His tongue snaked inside my mouth, and we deeply kissed as he pushed down my leggings. Landon broke the kiss and replied, “Because it’s only for you.”
“Perfect answer.” I removed my shoes and leggings and attempted to flee to my bedroom, but his strong arm pulled me back.
“Take off all your clothes right here,” he demanded.
“What if I say no?”
He responded by leaning against the doorjamb, staring into my eyes. I couldn’t look away, so I did exactly what he instructed. His dark gaze heated every inch of my body as I slowly lifted my hoodie over my body and tossed it on the floor.
“And those,” he said, staring at my panties.
I stepped out of them seductively, longing for whatever he had in store for me.
“Beautiful.” Landon dropped his pants and boxer briefs to the floor, and I smiled back at him.
I whistled. “Sexy as fuck.”
He chuckled as he backed into the hot and steamy shower, taking me with him. The water warmed my body, and the tension in my muscles lessened. Sighing, I curved my arms around his neck, pressing my breasts against his chest, loving the feel of my soft fullness on his hardness. Landon lowered his head and brushed his lips over mine, opening my mouth using his tongue. I relished his sweet taste and the roughness of his stubble on my cheeks. Then he turned me around, pushed me up on the marble wall, and lifted my leg. He thrust deep inside as I placed my cheek on the marble, screaming with pleasure as he pounded into me over and over. No one had been able to excite me like this man.
The shower rained over us as he thrust in and out, and just as I was about to reach the pinnacle of my existence, Landon stopped moving. “Had enough? Still mad?”
I hit the tiles. The games he played with my body. “Have you had enough? Cuz I can do this all night, and you better keep up.”
“I know.” He grinned devilishly. He began to pump slowly. “Still mad?”
“Hmm… mmm.”
“Show me.” He kissed under my ear while still moving in and out of me.
I pushed Landon down on the bench in the shower to climb on top of him and slide down his thick pole.
And I took every bit of my anger out on him.
June 18
The following afternoon, I awakened before Landon and turned on my phone. I had several missed texts and calls from the guys and Frankie. I eased out of bed, careful to not wake Landon, and sat on my sofa in the living area. My head throbbed as I scrolled through the texts.
I called Frankie. “Hey… is Cedrick with you?”
“No.”
“Good, because I didn’t want to talk to him before I’ve talked to Landon. Did Landon just up and quit Hollow Bones? Brian sent me a text begging Landon to call him.”
“From what I understand, Landon quit the band because he believes Cedrick gave you drugs. And he disappeared and hasn’t answered his phone since. I assume Landon is with you, or we would’ve heard from you by now.”
“He is. We’re in Austin, and he didn’t tell me he left the band.”
“Of course he didn’t. Landon is so afraid to lose you that he’d rather take out his anger on everyone but the one person he should be mad at. Cedrick is pissed and not talking to me. The rest of the guys don’t know what to do because they were supposed to head back to Harlem and finish the album. But hey, as long as you and Landon are all hugged up while all hell has broken everywhere else, do you.”
My temples pounded viciously. “Not that I owe you an explanation, but Landon was planning to leave me too, and he would’ve had the paparazzi not been in front of my door. We came here to get away from it all and work through all of this. I’ll figure something out to get them back together. He can’t break up the band because of me. The Hollow Bones is his heart.”
“Cedrick couldn’t sleep, worried about Landon and trying to find out where you and he had gone. He’s hurting, and he didn’t do anything to deserve Landon’s anger. I told you not to put Cedrick in the middle. But you had to have what you wanted and didn’t care how Landon or anyone else felt.”
Her tone grated on my nerves and added to my migraine. “I don’t need to hear this. I told you until you know what I’ve been through, you don’t have the right to judge me.”
“Then tell me what made you act like that. Huh? We’re supposed to be friends. What did your mother say to you, and why did Del escort her out?”
“We are friends, but I need to tell Landon before I tell anyone else. Be mad, or don’t. I’ll explain to you later. Just tell Cedrick I’m sorry, and I’ll fix it.” I hung up and rocked in place. I had to find a way to make things right for Landon and The Hollow Bones.
I pushed up from the sofa and decided to cook a late breakfast to keep my mind and hands occupied. We needed a hearty meal anyway. Landon wanted to hike around the nearby trail and Lake Travis, and I would use that time to talk about the band.
I had just finished setting the table with poached eggs, cheese grits, bacon, and toast when a shirtless Landon walked in. He glanced at the spread with hesitation before patting my ass. “Smells good.” He went to the refrigerator. “Orange juice?”
“On the table. Don’t worry, I’m boiling a couple of eggs for you.”
He nodded and pulled me away from the stove. “Sit. You’re still restless. Probably only slept a couple of hours.”
“I’m good.” Three. I’d slept three. We had more important things to discuss than my sleeping habits.
“Humor me.” Landon cocked a brow and pulled out the chair for me, then waited until I sat. He sat beside me and picked up the platter of grits. “I’ll wash the dishes.”
“Thank you.”
“No, thank you for the breakfast.” He reached for my plate and added grits. His fresh scent wafted over the table.
“How often do you shower a day when I’m not around?”
“Several times when I’m at home.” He shrugged and picked up a piece of bacon.
“If you can’t, does that bug you out?”
“It was worse when I was younger. Now I can handle it. As long as I can take a shower before I sleep, I can deal. I use soap and oils that don’t dry out my skin. Does it bother you?”
Though I had no appetite, I forced myself to take a bite of grits. “A good-smelling man will never bother me. Does it bother you that I usually take one shower and two on days when I have time?”
“No. I love your natural scent.” He frowned. “Okay, I do want you to take a shower after you’ve been out all day and before you get in bed with me.”
“I do take a shower when I get home.”
“If you’re out real late, you don’t, and then want to be up under me.” He wrinkled his nose.
I slapped his shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me that bothers you?”
“You’re mean when you’re sleepy and can’t rest. I’m trying to stay alive.” He snickered.
“I’m sleepy a lot.”
Landon got up to retrieve his eggs and put them on his plate. “I know.”
“Is that why you want me to be quiet with you, so I won’t be mean to you?”
His eyes met mine. “No. I do that to take care of you. I want to take care of you. I want to be enough.”
“You are enough.”
“I wasn’t Saturday night,” he retorted.
I picked up my cell. “Is that why you left Hollow Bones? Everyone has been blowing up my cell because you refuse to answer yours.”
He finished chewing. “It’s not your business.”
“You left because of me. It is my business.”
Landon wiped his mouth with a napkin. “I left the band because Cedrick’s decision was more than about you. He cared more about the show than you and me. He knows me better than anyone else, knows how I feel about you and drugs. He should’ve walked away from you, no matter how much you begged him.”
“Brian gave me the Xanax. Not Cedrick,” I admitted. “Cedrick didn’t make the decision.”
Landon’s eyes widened, and then he nodded slowly. “Oh, I should’ve figured Brian couldn’t resist you. He’s been crushing on you this whole time. He wanted to swoop in and rescue you. Well, it’s a good thing I quit the band and not just Cedrick.”
Placing my hand on top of his, I reassured him, “Brian doesn’t like me like that. He wanted to help.”
Landon glared at me so hard I removed my hand.
He picked up his fork. “Finish your food so we can get out of here. Please.”
“Landon, they’re your brothers. You have to fix it with them.”
“This trip is about you and me. I don’t want to talk about Hollow Bones or anything else but our relationship.”
“Why do you even want to try with me when you can’t forgive them?”
Some of the indignant anger in his eyes slipped. “You told me you wanted to share everything with me, and I want to do the same because no one has ever made me feel safe enough to do that. I’m glad those people were camped outside, or I would have made the biggest mistake of my life. I believe you’re worth losing everything, and I need to see if I’m right.” He pushed my plate closer to me. “Please eat so we can explore without you passing out because of exhaustion. We have plenty of time to hash out anything we need to.”
The hope in his expression settled my migraine and stirred my appetite.