17. Luke
Luke
I’m not sure what happens to me when Blake is in the room, but honestly, I’m tired of fighting it. I am not a crude guy, and talking so candidly about my sexual desires is not something I am accustomed to, but she awakens this side of me. One I’m getting more and more curious to explore.
“You look tired,” she comments. “Do you still have a long shift ahead of you?”
“Nope. Just ended, well technically, it ended an hour ago, but I got caught up with a patient. You have perfect timing.”
“You probably shouldn’t be drinking coffee then,” she adds with a half smile.
“It’s decaf tea. I have been having a hard time sleeping, so I know better than to add caffeine to the mix.”
“Why?” she asks with a laugh. “Too busy picturing the horror show I unleashed on you this weekend?”
“More of a fantasy than a horror show, but I’ve just been struggling to find my footing here.” She doesn’t respond right away, instead she studies me. Concern etches her face, prompting her to lean in closer. So close I can smell the hint of vanilla and honey as it radiates off her.
“Luke, I’ve never seen you like this. Are you sure you’re OK?”
There is an undeniable warmth in her gaze, a softness. It looks a lot like affection. She’s worried about me.
“I will be. I just need more time to adjust.”
“Luke, if you're even half the doctor I believe you are, they're fortunate to have you here.”
“It’s just been hard. I had a place there, you know? Credibility and people who trusted me. I haven’t been the new guy in a long time, and now…” I pause, not knowing what I’m even thinking. She doesn’t expect me to continue. She just stands up and scoots in close to me.
Without a word, she places her head on my shoulder, grabs my hand between hers, and lightly glides her fingers over each knuckle.
It’s a soft yet intimate action. An action likely to be exchanged between two people madly in love, who care deeply for one another.
It’s simple. Natural. Like she’s done it a million times.
We sit like this and drink our coffee and tea in silence, and right now here in this moment, Blake is a silent calm in my personal storm.