Chapter 130 Bahira
Chapter One Hundred and Thirty: Bahira
It had been four days since Nox left to rescue Rhea, his magic and strength back after removing the dragon stone shard from beneath his skin, which held the magic of who knows how many councilmen.
Even now, staring up at the dark ceiling of my room during another sleepless night, my teeth grind together at the thought.
I don’t need magic to know that being cut off from it for long periods of time could change someone.
Make them go mad. And in a way, Nox had.
Perhaps the effects were lessened by the tonic that they gave him, but my brother had never behaved like I witnessed, and I can only hope that he’s able to bring Rhea back with a clear head, ready to tackle whatever this next phase of restoring our kingdom will look like.
With the council locked in the dungeon for their treachery, Elora and I, with the help of Max, had moved the Mirror back to its original place in the throne room.
Since Nox left, I have spent every day using the Mirror to call out to Kai.
The magic within it responded to my command, swirling and shifting like thick mist over water.
But the shifter king never appeared on the other side.
I had gotten pathetically desperate late one evening, debating the merits of calling out to another kingdom to make sure the Mirror actually works.
The fae king seemed like the safest option, so I called out for him, assuming that it wouldn’t work but unsure of what I would do if it did.
I nearly jumped back when he appeared on the other side, his black eyes staring at me with a malice I hadn’t known one could harbor for a stranger.
I made up a reason for reaching out to him on behalf of my father, something about confirming trade routes.
The male didn’t speak a single word before abruptly stepping away from his Mirror and ending our conversation.
It was better that he did, but I still found myself cursing him under my breath as I ran a hand down my face.
The truth had become undeniable. The Mirror works—which means Kai is ignoring me.
If there is a moment when you decide you’d like to talk with me again, I will make sure someone is always guarding the Mirror.
His words are a hollow echo in my mind now. Perhaps, he’s already confirmed that Rhea was taken through other means and has deemed contact with me pointless.
Be my ruin. I huff out a broken laugh.
It has been nearly three months, and it’s easy to imagine him moving on with his life, with someone else.
My mind runs rampant with thoughts of a mystery woman’s hands on his body.
Tracing the edges of his tattoos. My stomach twists at the imagined scenario, but what makes it worse is picturing her learning what each line and curve and shape mean.
Him trusting another as he had trusted me and telling them about his mother.
About Jahlee and his childhood and his fears as king.
It is selfish to feel as if I have any claim to him anymore, because I know that I don’t.
Yet my heart still races at the thought of him falling for someone else, and perhaps, that is my penance.
After all, what could be worse than finally admitting that I fell in love for the first time, only to follow it with the realization that I will never see him again.
“Tell me Kallin’s given you something,” I say as I practically barge into the queen’s dining room, my mother and father already sitting.
Steam wafts off of the food set at the table’s center, an array of seasoned chicken, warm rolls, and grilled vegetables spread out on various platters.
“Because if he hasn’t, I’m sure some light torture will get him to speak. ”
“We don’t torture people here,” my father answers, though amusement lightens his tone.
“Maybe we should.” Pulling out a chair, I collapse into it, reaching aggressively for the platter of chicken in front of me and sliding some of the sliced meat onto my own plate.
“Give me and my spear ten minutes, and I’m sure we can convince anyone to talk.
” I reach for the vegetables next, then top my plate off with a warm roll.
I can feel my parents’ stares on me as I roughly pierce the food with my fork, shoving it into my mouth as I angrily chew.
“Is something bothering you, my rose?” my mother asks, drawing my gaze to her.
I chew the food, stabbing another piece of chicken but pausing before bringing it to my mouth.
“I ran into Haylee on the way here. Why the fuck is she still allowed access to the palace?” Though the chicken is delicious, its flavor is all but lost as I replay our interaction.
Dressed in a gown the lightest shade of pink with her hair done in a coronet braid, she looked every bit the blushing bride-to-be as she strolled down the hallway followed by a detail of guards.
“Unfortunately, we need her while your brother is gone and the council is imprisoned.”
I scoff as I meet my father’s gray eyes over the table.
“Why? What could we possibly need from her?” I’m adult enough to admit that I’m hurt after finding out the woman I considered one of my closest friends since childhood has actually been pretending in order to get to Nox.
That it has jaded logical thought surrounding her.
But fucking gods above, running into her in my own home is not a mistake I want repeated.
“Kallin was smart in the order that he did things as well as what information he chose to take public,” my mother answers, her hand resting on my father’s.
“And Nox wasn’t with the public way he removed the council.
” She pinches her lips together as she thinks over her next words.
“Your brother will return with Rhea and step into his role as king without the council that the people have known. It makes us look like we’re the ones who were deceitful.
Haylee, unfortunately, is a buffer. If she’s still parading around the palace… ”
“Then it gives credibility that Nox hasn’t completely betrayed his people.
” She nods, and I lean back in my chair.
But still, this doesn’t sit right with me.
“It’s only been a handful of months since they started their public perception campaign against us, right?
How much damage could possibly be done in that time frame? ”
“Enough that we are teetering on a very thin ledge. One made more precarious with the knowledge that Kallin is still controlling some of the guards from his cell. We have an idea of a few who are truly loyal to us, but the majority…” My father blows out a breath, a finger tapping on the table.
“Kallin’s deception began far earlier than when he found out about Rhea.
Earlier than when he made the choice to leave Hadrik and I out of the decision to keep the law regarding a future king’s betrothed. ”
I knit my brows together, my food forgotten in front of me. “What do you mean?”
He takes a small drink from his chalice before continuing. “I’ve had a lot of time to wonder why a man I thought was on my side might go to such lengths to dethrone me. To tear down one child while elevating another.”
“Poor Nox, always getting the short end of the stick,” I joke, earning one of his grins.
“Kallin’s actions are not that of a man only recently obsessed. And I think it has to do with our ancestors’ decision after the war.”
“The war?” I question.
“When Queen Lucia died putting up the Spell, she did not have a contingency in place for a successor. A Void queen doesn’t just have powerful magic, she also has the gift of immortality for as long as she is queen.
Until a successor is found through the Flame Ceremony.
” I nod my head, vaguely remembering reading this.
“Why have a plan of succession when you’re all but invincible until the next Void queen comes around,” I state, folding my arms over my chest.
“Precisely. So you can only imagine how it rocked the men and women left in charge. Of course, you know a member of the Daxel line was one of her closest advisors, and he was eventually named king, but it wasn’t without protest, and the loudest voice came from that of the Keria line.”
I let out a groan. Fucking Kallin.
“Because a queen of Void Magic could be long-lived between successors, they often took multiple partners through their lifespan, and one of Queen Lucia’s was from the Keria line.”
“Are you telling me that Kallin—that Daje—are part royalty?” I ask incredulously.
My mother laughs as she shakes her head. “Not exactly. Though Void queens all descend from a single familial line, it’s not like passing the crown down through a born heir. But Kallin’s ancestor tried to claim that it was. He knew that if it went to a vote among the council members, he would lose.”
“Which is eventually what happened,” my father supplies, taking another drink. “All that to say, I don’t have proof, but there is a chance that Kallin is acting on some long-term revenge plot.”
I scoff, reaching for my own drink. “Gods help us against the wills of men who believe they are owed something they aren’t.” At that, my parents chuckle, and the mood in the room softens.
“How are you, Bahira?” my mother asks, in a way that tells me she sees more than I want her to. I bristle because of it.
“Well enough.” I drag my fork over my plate as I avoid my parents’ knowing gazes. “With my discovery of the connection between blood and magic, I might have a new pathway to reversing the loss of magic. I’ve borrowed some journals from the archives—”
“The archives?” my father cuts in, an eyebrow raised.
Shit. I may have forgotten to let them in on that little adventure.
“Yes, and before you question it, you are the one who showed me where they were, and your best friend is the one who let me in.”
My mother covers her mouth with her hand, but not before I see the smile blooming there. My father rolls his eyes in feigned annoyance, but his own grin gives him away.
“Anyway, though they talk of blood and magic separately, there isn’t much yet in the way of what exactly happens when you mix them. I meant to try it on Nox when I had gathered samples of Cass’s blood, but—”
I pinch my lips together and swallow roughly. When I glance up at my parents, I find their eyes glassy and red, Cass as much of a son to them as he was a brother to Nox and me. Clearing my throat, I push back the pressure that builds in my eyes.
“I hope that I can experiment some more, if the state of things will allow, but…” I pause, searching for the words.
“It is strange to focus on this when there is so much happening externally. I’ve been trying for so long to uncover why our people’s magic is failing—why I’ve been cursed to live without magic—that it feels selfish to keep focusing on it while Nox is trying to rescue Rhea and run a kingdom.
While you both try to figure out who on the council is innocent while making sure our people don’t revolt.
” While I’m trying to figure out how to move forward knowing a piece of me is still back in the Shifter Kingdom.
“You are a leader, Bahi,” my father says, giving a small shrug. “You always have been. Those qualities won’t just quiet themselves because other things try to grab your attention.”
“But what if I’m wrong? What if I’ve spent all this time chasing a dead end when I could have been doing something else. Something of value. Something—” Something worthy of my status. My position. The privilege I’ve been given as princess—former princess—of the Mage Kingdom.
“There is no failure in trying something only to have it not work out. The only failure is to never have tried at all. You care for your people, for your family and loved ones. But you cannot expect to be something for them if you are not first honoring yourself.”
I stare down at my plate as I wonder if I know how to do that anymore.
However, I have a feeling there will be many nights spent stuck in my own head wondering just that, so I opt for a topic change as I return to the meal ahead of me.
“So, a Void queen has returned. What are the odds that the heir to the throne would be the one she fell in love with?”
Conversation blossoms from there, the topic shifting from Rhea to Nox and his reluctance to take the throne without Rhea at his side to my father’s temporary return to said throne.
I ask if the power has gone to his head.
He answers, saying that it never left. And though there is the persistent hum of chaos surrounding me—the Spell and the Mirror, Nox and the council, Kai—I’m able to temporarily block out the noise as I laugh and eat with my parents.
When dinner is over, we get up and say our goodnights, my father’s embrace tightening around me when I try to pull away. “I am proud of you, Bahira. You haven’t just been the smartest among us but the bravest. Your instincts haven’t guided you wrong yet. Trust them. Trust in yourself.”
I don’t voice the questions that nag at me in response. Instead, I just wrap my arms around him more tightly and hope that if I never do anything else, I at least keep making my father proud.