25. Katy
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
katy
FANTASY LIFE
Hand in hand, Ben leads us through Ella’s backyard, past all the wild roses, until we reach the little bonfire at the beach.
It’s a nice and cozy little beach setup, logs stacked neatly, flames crackling low and steady.
Someone’s got a speaker going, with soft music drifting over the sand.
The sun is setting, and the ocean is calm tonight, like it knows we have enough to deal with already.
Ella hands me a blanket as soon as she sees me.
“You’re cold,” she says.
“I’m not—”
“You are,” she insists, wrapping it around my shoulders anyway.
Ben laughs and presses a kiss into my hair like this is the most natural thing in the world. Like we’ve always been a couple. “Just let her baby you. She doesn’t really have an off switch.”
I relent, and Ben helps me sit in one of the wide chairs by the fire. Then he settles right next to me, slinging an arm around my shoulders. It feels so natural and familiar. It feels like this is where I’m meant to be.
Teenage Katy would absolutely be losing her mind that this is what her life looks like. She used to lie awake picturing nights like this—a fire on the beach, laughter carrying over the water, Ben beside her with his arm around her like he chose her.
Back then, it was a fantasy I was embarrassing myself by wanting. I was sure he would never see me that way.
Except he does. And this is real.
And he’s mine.
I lean back into his chest, letting myself feel it fully, and think, Wow. She’d be so happy.
We’re all gathered in a loose circle around the fire. Rebecca’s curled up on Tyler’s lap, and Leo and Mateo are both here too, each attached to their flavor of the night—or month, respectively. That’s what Ella calls them, at least. Hopefully only behind their backs. With her, you never know.
And Ella is tucked between Declan and Wyatt on the low bench. Her back rests against Declan’s chest while Wyatt leans in beside her to hand her another marshmallow, close enough that their shoulders brush like they don’t even notice anymore.
They look…synchronized. And extremely happy. All three of them.
Which is weird. Because if you’d told me last week that this exact configuration would exist without someone bleeding, I would’ve laughed in your face.
I tilt my head, squinting at them. “Are you guys… a threesome now?”
Everyone looks at me.
Ella blinks. “What?”
“I’m just saying.” I nod toward the three of them. “You’re sitting between your boyfriend and his emotional rival and somehow it’s giving friend goals.”
Rebecca lights up immediately. “Wait. Yes. That’s exactly what I think!” She points at me like she’s been waiting for backup. “I told you we’re besties for a reason.”
I hold up a hand. “Let’s be clear. Not besties. Aligned observers. Different thing.”
Rebecca gasps. “Rude.”
Wyatt snorts before he can stop himself.
Declan exhales a laugh, shaking his head. “We are not a threesome.”
“A throuple?” Leo offers helpfully.
“Stop.” Ella laughs, shoving at Declan’s knee. “You’re all insane.”
Declan tightens his arm around her anyway, smug. “We’re cool now. I’m good if she has an additional bodyguard when I’m not around.”
Wyatt lifts his marshmallow. “Exactly.”
Ben leans closer to me, voice low. “You’re brave for saying that out loud. It’s going to be a thing now.”
“I’m pregnant,” I whisper back. “I can say whatever I want.”
Ella rolls her eyes, but she’s smiling wide and easy, and when she leans back into Declan again, Wyatt doesn’t move away. There’s no tension between them. No weirdness at all. Somehow, against all logic, they work.
Maybe messy situations don’t always destroy people. Maybe sometimes they just force everyone to build something new.
Hopefully that can be true for me too.
I lean back against Ben’s chest, letting myself sink into the warmth of him while the fire crackles softly in front of us.
For the first time in my life, I understand that life doesn’t have to be perfect to be amazing.
“I think the baby is sitting on my bladder again,” I mumble to Ben after a while. He presses a distracted kiss to my temple. “Need me to carry you?”
“I can walk by myself. I’m pregnant, not useless.”
“That’s debatable,” Rebecca mutters.
I flip her off as I stand, wrapping Ella’s blanket tighter around my shoulders before heading toward the house.
The noise from the beach fades the closer I get to the back door. Inside, the kitchen lights glow warm against the dark windows.
I’m halfway down the hallway when I hear voices coming from the kitchen.
Male voices.
Tyler and Wyatt.
I slow automatically at the sound of my name.
“I’m just saying it’s messy,” Tyler says, low enough that it’s obvious he doesn’t think anyone else can hear him. “Ben’s a great guy. He’s too good, honestly. That’s what worries me.”
Wyatt’s response comes instantly, sharp enough to make me freeze.
“Careful.”
“No, come on,” Tyler presses. “What if the baby isn’t even his?”
Something cold slips down my spine.
Silence stretches for half a second.
Then I hear Wyatt’s voice again, colder this time. “Watch your fucking mouth.”
Tyler exhales hard. “I’m not trying to be a dick.
It’s just that he’s walking into a situation he can’t fix just because he thinks he loves her.
This is just going to slow him down because a baby is a huge responsibility.
Right now, he’s projected to go first overall in the draft, but that can disappear fast if he can’t keep up. ”
“This isn’t your problem. You need to shut the fuck up about it,” Wyatt shoots back.
I stop breathing for a few seconds. The hallway suddenly feels too small. Like the walls are closing in around me.
Tyler isn’t wrong. Ben is too good. He’s loyal and selfless and willing to sacrifice himself for people he loves.
And maybe I’ve been selfish enough to let him.
My throat burns.
I back away before they can hear me, clutching the blanket tighter around my shoulders.
Out on the beach, Ben is laughing at something Mateo says, head tipped back, easy and happy and completely unaware that my entire world just tilted sideways.
And suddenly all I can see is everything he could lose.
His dream to play in the NFL. His freedom. The version of his life that existed before me, before all my chaos crashed into it.
The realization hits like a punch.
Ben would give it up without hesitation if it meant protecting me.
And maybe I need to stop letting him.
I stand there for a second too long, staring at him across the fire, already missing him and the fantasy we’ve been living.
BEN
Caroline added Katy to the Davis Family Group Chat.
My phone lights up while I’m leaving practice, and I already know this is going to be a disaster.
Caroline
Hi Katy! Ben was just telling us how great you’re doing, so I thought it might be easier to add you to the chat directly. We’re so happy you and the baby are doing well. Send us more sonogram pictures please
I wince immediately. Jesus, is that how unhinged I am too?
Ben
Mom. Chill.
Caroline
Benjamin Davis, don’t you “chill” me. I’m incapable of chilling, you know this.
Dad reacts with a thumbs up to that message because of course he does.
Katy
Thank you for checking in, Caroline. I appreciate it.
Caroline
Let us know if you need absolutely anything. We’ll see you next weekend!
I stare at Katy’s response longer than I should.
It sounds perfectly polite.
That’s the problem.
A week ago, she would’ve sent something sarcastic or funny back. She had been loving the attention.
A weird feeling settles low in my stomach.
We’d been having such a good time together. We were so good. But ever since the bonfire, something’s been… off.
Not in an obvious way. Just like a gut feeling.
At first, I tell myself I’m overthinking it. She’s probably more tired than usual so she’s been quieter. She’s been writing a lot, so it makes sense that I’ve seen her less.
And she doesn’t seem upset, just distracted. Like her thoughts are a few steps ahead of her body. But the spark in her eyes dimmed. Maybe the book she’s been writing is sad or something.
I get out of the car to pick her up for lunch. She greets me, textbook polite, but she doesn’t kiss me. She doesn’t cling to my hand like she did.
I slow my stride without thinking, matching her pace like I always do. Except this time, she doesn’t notice or smile.
That’s also new. I open the car door for her, and she thanks me, again polite but distant. It just… doesn’t feel like her.
Whatever we had going on before? It’s gone. The vibes are completely ruined. I wait until we’re buckled in and pulling out of the driveway before I try to ask her what’s going on.
“Are you okay?”
She nods quickly. “Yeah. Totally. Why?”
“Because you’ve been kinda… quiet,” I say carefully. “Which is fine. I just wanna make sure I didn’t miss something.”
She keeps her eyes on the road. “You didn’t.”
I nod, even though my gut disagrees. We drive in silence for a minute. Then two. Then three. Normally we fill space easily with music debates, dumb jokes, me pointing out what fruit the baby is this week. But now the quiet stretches, heavy and unfamiliar.
Finally, I break. “Was it weird that my mom added you to the group chat?”
She exhales slowly, like she’s been holding it in. “No. She’s lovely. I’m just… a little scared I’ll break her heart.”
“I get it,” I say quickly. “I know she seems nice and sweet, but she’s not a delicate flower, Katy. My mom is a grown woman who will love our baby like her own no matter what. I promise. I wouldn’t let her near you if I wasn’t sure of it.”
“I know.” Her voice softens. “Your whole family’s amazing.”
The compliment lands weird. Like she’s thanking me for something she didn’t expect to be thankful for. I glance over at her. She’s gripping the straps of her purse tighter than necessary.
“Katy.” I lean in slightly. “If something else is bothering you, you can tell me. You should tell me. I want to fix it.”
She smiles at me then. A real smile. Warm and familiar.
“I know.”
And somehow, that makes it worse.
By the end of the week, I start hating Katy’s laptop a little.
Which is insane because I really am fucking proud of her and her books, and I want to support her dreams.
But every time I come over lately, she’s curled up somewhere writing. And it’s starting to feel like an excuse not to talk to me.
At the kitchen counter while we eat together.
On the couch while we watch TV.
And every time I ask what she’s working on, she gives me the same small shrug.
“Just stuff.”
She used to read that “stuff” to me out loud. But now it’s like she doesn’t want me inside her head anymore.
Tonight, I’m stretched across her bed half watching ESPN while she sits against the headboard beside me typing nonstop. The room glows gold from the lamp on her nightstand. A week ago, she would’ve been halfway on top of me by now.
Now there’s so much space between us. And not just in the physical sense.
“You’re writing a lot lately,” I say. I don’t want to be an unsupportive dick. But I can feel her pulling away from me, and I need to do something about it.
Her fingers pause for half a second before starting again. “Deadlines. I want it all to be done before the baby comes.”
“Oh.” Well, that makes perfect fucking sense, and now I feel like an asshole.
Silence settles again except for the sound of her keyboard clicking softly. But my chest still feels weird. I rub a hand over it. “Is it good?”
She glances over finally. “What?”
“The book.”
A small smile touches her mouth. “I think so.”
I nod, even though something uncomfortable twists low in my stomach.
Katy belongs in this world of books and words. Meanwhile, I barely survived freshman English and still have to reread texts three times sometimes before answering them.
The thought slips in before I can stop it. Maybe she’s starting to remember that. Maybe once the excitement wore off, she realized loving me and trusting me to help raise her child are two completely different things.
My throat tightens.
Katy keeps typing. Technically next to me, but farther away than she’s ever been.
KATY
Ben’s family keeps pulling me closer like they’ve already decided I belong to them. And every single time they do, panic crawls higher up my throat.
His mom sends me baby toys. His dad asks if he likes the crib his mom bought for their house so he can start assembling it.
Ben keeps sending baby name suggestions in their family group chat to be voted on like this is happy and simple.
And the terrifying part is that they mean it.
They actually do love me.
But what happens when the baby comes and it’s not Ben’s? Or when Ben doesn’t make the NFL because of us?
What happens when all this warmth disappears? When they look at me differently? When they realize I wasn’t worthy of all this trouble?
I know how fast love can turn into resentment. I’ve lived it. And I really don’t want to live it again.
But somehow that still didn’t stop me from wanting this. From wanting Ben and wanting this family. Wanting this impossible little fantasy life badly enough that I let all of them love me anyway.
It’s the most selfish thing I’ve ever done.